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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To spend some of the kids' Christmas money on a meal out?

339 replies

Happythistime · 27/01/2016 17:34

Can't decide whether this sits right with me or not.

We are thinking of taking the kids to the Rainforest Cafe at the weekend. It is super expensive due to its central London location and themed interior. I want us to go and not wince at the prices and I know the kids will love it so am toying with using a little bit of their Christmas money that they've received from relatives to go towards the bill.

I think that if Christmas money I had given to a child went towards a nice day out, be it a meal or a show or something similar I'd be happy with that. Usually we just put their gift money straight into savings as they have more toys than they need. A bit of me worries though that people would see it as me and DH profiting from their xmas presents. We would obviously pay the bulk of it and only put a bit of their money towards enabling us to go and enjoy it without feeling resentful at the prices. AIBU?

OP posts:
imwithspud · 31/01/2016 23:29

Meh, dd's both got £20 ELC gift cards off a family member for Christmas. Dd2's first birthday is coming up in a few months and I'm considering using her gift card to get her a present or two from there. She knows no different and I'd rather put it towards something she will get a lot of use out of rather than spending it on a toy for now which probably won't get used a lot for the sake of it.

No idea what dd1's (3) gift card will go towards, there's nothing she really wants toy-wise and she has enough clothes. She also has a toys r us card from her birthday which we've only spent £5 of on a peppa puzzle she wanted. Unless we can think of something sooner I have no qualms about spending the cards on gifts for her next birthday.

Any cash they get gifted goes into their isa accounts. As they get older and start being more aware and understand the concept of money/gift cards more then they will gradually get more freedom with it. But now, whilst their blissfully unaware, we control their money because as parents we know best.

Marniasmum · 01/02/2016 00:05

so imwithspud your dd will be paying for her own birthday presents from you? I think what you and the Op are doing is pretty shabby.
Op Have looked at the adults menu, and for 2 adult meals it will be at least £ 50 or £60 for the 2 of you!
Do you think a 15 yo would let you spend their b/day money on a family treat? No, so you are essentially taking advantage of your kids naivety
imwithspud spend the vouchers but put the same amount in their ISA.

crispytruffle · 01/02/2016 00:09

I wouldn't do it. I am their parent and I make sure they are fed, I would't feel right about my children paying for their own meal.

Marniasmum · 01/02/2016 00:11

Has she said it is just the kids meals, or everyone's?

imwithspud · 01/02/2016 06:02

Jesus, anyone would think we were taking the gift cards and exchanging them for drugsHmm

AutumnLeavesArePretty · 01/02/2016 07:25

That just highlights the fact why I no longer give cash or vouchers to children, parents seem to think it's actually their gift. Getting somebody else to pay for your childs present then presenting it from you is very low.

RufusTheReindeer · 01/02/2016 07:42

marm

I beg to differ, my friends two teenagers quite often put their money birthday and pocket money towards family treats

They are very switched on, generous young men

My children on the other hand...Hmm

I used to recycle birthday presents when my children were very young, so something that was bought for ds1 and had been forgotten about would be guven to dd or ds2

multivac · 01/02/2016 07:44

Who said people are 'presenting it from' themselves? I always make it clear whence the gift/treat.

And so now you no longer give vouchers/money, you actually have to think about what the child might really enjoy, ALAP. You have to make a decision on their behalf, in effect, on how to spend money you've set aside for them. Hmmmm........

Marniasmum · 01/02/2016 10:06

Rufus I quite like being called 'marm' I hope you are curtseying too!

Muskateersmummy · 01/02/2016 10:21

Marnia ... Op has said it will paid just for the dc meals, they will pay for the adults.

RufusTheReindeer · 01/02/2016 12:25

Oops sorry marn

I am indeed curtseying and doffing my cap Grin

TubbyTabby · 01/02/2016 13:44

i wouldn't. its their money.
if you want the meal for you and them, you should pay for it yourself. them's the breaks of being a parent, i'm afraid.

KakiFruit · 01/02/2016 14:26

Stealing! Oh my god, I'm howling with laughter here.

OnlyLovers · 01/02/2016 17:48

Oh, I somehow missed all the nutso comments about it being stealing. Grin Grin Grin

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