...to ask those that had an 'easy' and 'amazing' birth how the hell they managed it?

[stumblymonkey]

Hi,

I'm shamelessly posting here for traffic.

I hear these stories of women who have had 'easy' births or 'amazing' birth experiences.

Are they urban myths? Or reserved for child #16 when your vagina is stretched to water slide proportions?

Did anyone have a great birthing experience with DC1 and if so.....what do you think you did, if anything, that I could steal?

Luck, positive mindset and a doula.

I am a petite 5ft3 with narrow hips and I pushed out a 9lb1oz baby naturally. It wasn't perfect, but it was a very positive experience overall, and especially compared with most people I know.

My labour was very quick and terrifyingly intense. I was fully dilated and having absolutely terrifying double peaking contractions within 4 hours of the very first signs of labour. Getting to hospital in that state, and getting through triage at hospital was brutally uncomfortable, and most of my pushing was done flat on my back on a bed as they fished me out of the pool because they wanted to do continuous monitoring. Not ideal. I was pushing for between 2 and 3 hours and was struggling for energy and motivation by the end. BUT, I went through the whole thing feeling pretty calm and confident that I would do it and that it was all ok, all under control and

I had two wobbles- one when I was in transition (as I realised later) and needed to get up and into the car to get to hospital. I remember insisting I couldn't do it and I didn't want to go. And near the end of pushing, when he kept moving back up the birth canal after every push, I remember saying 'is there not a way we can just get him out?'.

I keep saying that my experience of birth is a complete contradiction- at once the single most painful and terrifying and overwhelming experience of my whole life, but also totally doable.

Obviously I was fortunate to not need any intervention, but I also credit two things. While I was pregnant I read only one book, Ina May's Guide to Childbirth. It was so calming and reassuring, and the birth stories in it stayed with me and just gave me this mindset that what will be will be and childbirth is positive and doable. And then on the day my doula was there constantly reassuring me that everything that was happening was totally normal and good and that I was doing fine and would get through it. It meant I just surrendered completely and focused totally on the moment rather than letting my brain take over which I KNOW would have resulted in me overthinking, panicking and labour probably slowing down. The end result was I got through the whole thing with no pain relief whatsoever. 9 hours in total and it was over before I knew it although there were individual moments that seemed interminable at the time.

I also went to an antenatal yoga class run by another doula which involved a lot of talking and relating of real life birth stories. That also helped me to go into labour very calmly.

That's lovely Lilly, me too about the last bit especially

Mind you I had a land and water birth too and I think I got a better view with my bog standard high hospital bed second birth - maybe because I put the emphasis on lots of immediate skin to skin on my birth plan, as with DD they rather took her away to tidy her up and wrap in a blanket and give to DH, after a fleeting but lovely few moments with her on my tummy in the pool. I didn't let them have DS for about half an hour so I'm sure he put on a few oz's from BFing before he got weighed (I was tandem feeding them from birth of DC2 so he probably got more milk than usual for a newborn)

So, definitely make your preferences known for those moments straight after birth. Whatever has gone on before that point it can often be a lovely time with your baby.

Had an ELCS calm tranquil and wonderful

Luck. I went from 2 to 10 cm dilated in one hour. Not too much pain. 2 pushes and 10 minutes later did was born.

Luck is definitely a factor but I am convinced that the pregnancy yoga and breathing techniques I learnt helped greatly (and I'm not a hippy dippy type, never done any yoga before I got pregnant). As did staying on my feet, swaying with the contractions and being at home until the last minute. I gave birth in a birth centre rather than a hospital and although i was knackered and felt like my insides had fallen out and been stitched back in afterwards it was a very positive experience.

I wouldn't say my first child was an "amazing" birth but it was relatively easy. I have quite a high pain threshold, hate to make a fuss about things (I was apologising to the midwife for "bothering her" even as she insisted on doing an internal and revealed I was 10cm dilated) and kept very fit and active throughout the pregnancy. The baby was in the right position, it was too late to take any painkillers that might have slowed labour down so after momentary panic, I just got on with it.

I did feel awesome after it was over - completely worth it for the endorphin/adrenaline rush that came then .

I've had two lovely water births at home. Easy, calm, one long labour, one short. I had gas and air for the first, nothing for the second. Did some hypno breathing. I never felt the pain was beyond what I could handle. I honestly couldn't feel a thing when pushing. I think breathing properly is everything.

Third, I had to go to hospital which was awful. Still had an easy, quick birth, but much, much easier and happier at home.

I was always upright for the births, never lying down. I imagine I would have hated that.

I'm lucky, I know. But yes, it is possible to enjoy giving birth. I'd love to do it again.

My first birth was pretty traumatic, but looking back I was so fearful and not at all informed about what my body was doing, I spent the whole labour fighting every contraction, not even wanting to push! My poor back to back DD became completely wedged and was forceps delivery after 2 failed epidurals.
My 2nd DD's birth was the polar opposite, everything that happened, I went with it, stayed active/upright, completely got in the zone! I read everything i could about birth psychology/physiology stuff, and I can honestly say I had no feelings of fear or dread. Yes it was painful at times, but I felt like I was working towards something, like it was a process. I used G&A, and felt quite lovely and drunk aswell...bonus! In a weird way, I enjoyed it. And yes I understand how hippy I sound. I dont care!

Genetics, luck, size of baby (mine were 5, 12 and 6, 12)
Arrived at hospital after waters broke, they tried to send me home. I refused. They did an examination and rushed me to the labour ward wondering how I hadn't broken into a sweat....2 hours later DD was born, no stitches etc.
DS was in an even bigger hurry. Less than 2 hours. No stitches etc. He came out so fast he span round and the midwife had to catch him. All (midwife, student midwife, student observer, student nurse) round the bottom of the bed gave a little scream, they were so surprised. What can I say, I love to entertain.......

My second - planned c/s - was pretty easy!!!!

Luck and good support during labour

Mine were all CSs - the worst bits were the spinals & getting moving afterwards (& having resolutely unsucky babies, but that was disappointing rather than painful)

However I remember vividly one woman I saw on OBEM. She had several children already, & I don't know how long she was in active labour, but she literally never made a sound throughout (on screen) & the baby appeared as if by magic.

I did envy her

I think that a lot of it is to do with expectation.
I'd been to NCT classes for DD1 and thought anything was possible. Tiny baby, unproductive labour for days, exhausted and begging for drugs then epidural. Not great.
With DD2 I expected hours of agony and misery and actually it was overall a positive experience; managed on gas and air, only 17 hours.
For some people a 17 hour labour on gas and air may not have been positive. I felt like an earth mother compared to the first one.

Luck, staying active in labour and staying focused, not panicking.

DC1 was my hardest birth - 6.5 lb, induction, epidural, the lot. Felt like a wreck afterwards.

DC3 was the easiest despite being 10.5 lb - beautiful water birth, I knew what to expect and how to manage things, no pain relief and an awesome midwife (and easiest recovery). But baby was very overdue and I narrowly missed another induction - could have been a very different story!

Its sheer luck and nothing else. Its just luck.

Even the body that is perfect at birthing will get a baby that gets stuck, moves, has a nail sticking out and so on.

I definitely don't think size of baby means much. I had 4 easy births.
Ds: waters broke 10 am. Contractions started around 3, but no one believed it was anything serious. By 7 I demanded a V.E. though I was coping well breathing through & using relaxation techniques, I felt that those strong period pains were more than the early labour the mw insisted I was in. Turns out I was 5 cm. The rest is a G&A & pethidine induced fog, but ds was born just after midnight.

Dd1 was waters going at 5am, her born 10.20, fairly quick, but slow enough for those endorphins to build up.

Dd2 1st home birth. Pretty bad SPD & floppy pelvis meant that 1st contraction to birth was only 2h. So quick I lost control due to sudden intensity of pain & no pain relief either, because it arrived when I was pushing.

Dd3 2nd home birth; this was an annoying labour where contractions felt like cystitis rather than anything else. I distinctly remember thinking after 3 hours of that: sod it, I'm not having this anymore, I'm pushing this baby out! 2 pushes later she was born.

My favourite labour was dd1. I felt 100% in control & pethidine induced fog. I coped well with the pain. Used gravity (kneeling), which made pushing so much easier. I also experienced that post birth high in a way I never experienced again.

Something no-one told me, though I should perhaps have known, having calved a lot of heifers and witnessed the same thing. You are more likely to tear if you are significantly overweight as fat can be stored in the pelvic canal. I now live on Norway and one of my friends was encouraged both to lose weight and to walk for 30 minutes every day. I wish I'd received the same advice.

Other than that, don't pre-plan too much. You have no idea what you will need, so think about it, but don't set your mind too firmly against anything that might ultimately help.

Good luck.

Yes it can be easy, my first (and only) child arrived in little over 2 hours in a MLU, I had pethidine and Gas and air. It wasn't overly painful and I was home at lunchtime, could have gone home earlier but there wasn't a spare midwife to check me out so to speak. However I did suffer Spd badly and still suffer 2 years on so I would have rather a painful birth than the ongoing pelvic problems but hey ho.

For me what I did was the following, it isn't genetic in my family to have a quick birth as nobody else did. What helped I don't know or whether it was a combination of everything.

I did not worry about the birth at all – at the end of the day it’s not a lot of time to be in labour no matter how long yours lasts as just think of the amount of hours in your lifetime – it’s not any length of time really! Keep active and upright, use the ball and walk around, let gravity do it’s job.

Before labour from about 37 weeks every other day I had used perineal massage and evening primrose oil, also took raspberryleaf tea from 34 weeks – whether it all helped I don’t know but it didn’t do any harm – look into it and make your own mind up, I am only telling you what I did and not implying you should. I also took superdrug’s own version of Pregnacare throughout as well as Omega 3 as recommended by the midwife. I think I was taking about 5 pills every day for the last couple of weeks as well as Tumms for acid reflux – I felt like I rattled!!

I did do a blog post about my experience as I didn't come across many positive stories:

teamstokey.blogspot.co.uk/2013/07/our-new-arrival.html

I had both my children at home. I used hypnobirthing and didn't use any pain relief other than a paracetamol! The contractions are intense but I was very relaxed (the hypnobirthing and bring at home helped me but it isn't for everyone) I'm not particularly 'free love' but really did enjoy the birthing experience. I'm 5'2" and DS1 was 8lb1 dd 7lb13.
I send you easy birth vibes x

I love telling my birth story

Taken in a week overdue - they examined me with a view to induce me, but I was already a few cm dilated.

I was moved down to the labour ward where I slept peacefully til morning. I had gas and air through the morning, but mostly dozed. Did the pop master quiz on radio 2. Asked for a mince pie after too much gas and air. Screamed once and was told to calm down. Pushed 3 times and thought I'd done a poo... in fact I'd delivered an 8lb 13 girl.

Walked to the shower after tea and toast.

. Pushed 3 times and thought I'd done a poo... in fact I'd delivered an 8lb 13 girl.

That is the dream. 1st baby?

I have had four fairly easy and somewhat amazing births - all four labours together are just under 6.5hrs and all were straightforward. I had 3 home deliveries which were textbook. I do think that a lot of it was down to luck and also that I had no set birth plan ideas so nothing that happened would have made me feel that things weren´t going to plan and stressed me out. But mostly luck.

Luck I suppose!

First DS took about 12hrs with just gas and air, took a few hours of pushing which was exhausting and he got a little stuck on my pelvis, but once I shown a different position he came quite quickly and I had no complications, I felt very lucky as all my other NCT buddies had much harder births.

Second DS was a record breaker and left my head spinning! 2hr 15min labour, I had only been at the hospital for 20mins when he quite literally exploded into the world with the first push, the midwife was sceptical I was even fully in labour because my waters hadn't broken and I was so zen (my pain coping mechanism is just to go into my own little world and shut everything out), but just as she advised she was going to do the first internal examination the urge to push kicked in and he practically surfed out on a wave of amniotic fluid, wee, meconium and goodness knows what else! The midwife barely managed to get her gloves on to catch him it was awesome. I certainly think the midwife will remember it for years to come lol

Hypnobirthing. At home. In a pool. Was relaxed, calm and in control.

I think if you feel in control and calm, then the experience will be a positive one, even if things don't go as planned. I know people who've had emergency c-sections and still described it as an amazing experience because they'd done hypno classes and didn't feel scared.

Would thoroughly recommend.

Just pure luck.
Was very different for different births.