To not move on the train?

[TheCatsMeow]

I was on a very busy packed train with my friend and DS. DS was in a sling, we had the buggy and I was feeding him. We were standing by the doors (no one offered us seats!) trying to feed a screaming baby, penned in by others standing. There was no where we could go.

People tried to push past us to get out the doors and nearly sent DS flying. I firmly asked if they could use one of the other doors and I literally couldn't go anywhere. Cue mutterings and dirty looks!

We couldn't collapse the pram there wasn't room to do and as no one had offered a seat we couldn't move anywhere! WIBU to ask them to use another door?

[BIWI]

I wasn't blocking the whole train, there's loads of other doors

But on a commuter train there generally isn't much time to get down a carriage and into another one to exit via another door!

You are being incredibly unreasonable, and also seem to think that the world revolves around you because you have a baby!

It's tough travelling with a baby and all the paraphernalia that comes with one, but you have to work out a way to do so that will work with other people who are travelling with you.

And apart from anything else, blocking the door is a safety risk.

[lunar1]

I bloody hate train travel and will avoid it at all costs, and this is one of the main reasons. It's so easy to miss a stop because of people doing what you did. On a train as busy as you say there is no way you could get to another exit in time. Depending on the train you could force someone to travel for an hour past their stop.

[CultureSucksDownWords]

I really want to know why the friend couldn't have helped? And if you accept that you should have folded the buggy before getting on the train. You could also ask the platform staff where the priority seats will be on the train and get on that carriage. Then demand ask for a priority seat.

[Bubbletree4]

Yabu to block a door. I'd have worried that if I walked through the carriage to avoid you that the train would pull off and I'd miss my stop. Generally if you are forced to block a door, the etiquette is to get off yourself to allow people off and then get back on.

That said, I'd try to avoid train travel at busy times with small kids and kit unless essential. Bloody nightmare.

[TheCatsMeow]

If i were seated on the train and seen a mother struggling to feed her child standing up first of all I would have offered my seat, or asked a nearby passenger if they would mind (if you don't ask you don't get!) i would probably of helped fold the buggy too, ask if i could do it for you or help you with the bags or baby to do so. theres nothing worse knowing that you are being a hindrance but not being able to do anything about it

Thank you. I always try to help anyone when I can, whether that's someone with a pram or just with heavy bags. That's what being nice is.

How can people not understand it's easier for an able bodied adult to walk to another door than it is to move everything on and off with a baby? When I'm blocked in?

I think people are inconsiderate. I wasn't standing there for the fun of it. Is it that hard to just have patience?

[BringMeTea]

A classic AIBU. You WERE BU. Many, many people have told you that OP. But still you demur. Why bother posting? Genuine question.

[seagreengirl]

YABU if I couldn't get off a tube at my stop I think that I would have a panic attack. There's no time to push through a crowded carriage. And if, as you say, the carriage was not crowded why didn't you go and stand there, and leave the stuff with your friend, you would have got a seat in no time. Your friend sounds a bit useless.

[lorelei9]

FirstMum "I'm shocked by some of the responses on here, you would think you'd never had to run for a train before"

but the door being blocked by people could have been holding them up from making their next connection ..?

OP, you'd have been better off asking the people in front of you to step off the train to allow the others space to get off.

I can see we are all creeping round the subject so I'm wondering, was it one of those horribly delayed trains from this morning? I presume you didn't get on a packed train or rush hour train for any reason other than a crucial one e.g doc appointment.

[goodnightdarthvader1]

Because the train might move on before they can get off.

You haven't explained:

• why your friend couldn't help you
  
• why you didn't find the buggy before being on the train
  

I'd also be interested to know where you were going during rush hour.

[MrsJackAubrey]

I think you've been given your answers, Cats, and you just don't want to accept that you were being unreasonable (very). YOU were being inconsiderate ffs.

You sound, as you say yourself, rather as though you think you are indeed 'the cat's meow'.

[goodnightdarthvader1]

Fold the buggy*

[Walkingintheraindrops]

I think it's just one of those things OP. They can be tricky. I can understand why either sides were irritated.

[lorelei9]

OP, you also haven't explained about the empty aisle and why you weren't standing there.

[Shutthatdoor]

It's hardly a marathon to walk to the other end of the carriage!

It would be for me!

You had your friend with you. Why did they not help you?

You are becoming more unreasonable the more you post

As for your post about having the audacity to have a child..... grow up!

[TamaraLamara]

I really want to know why the friend couldn't have helped?

I fear we'll never know, as that question has been raised repeatedly but soundly ignored by the OP.

[Walkingintheraindrops]

My buggy/ pram doesn't fold. Most don't do they? Only the old fashioned strollers. My bugaboo does collapse, but it a similar size collapsed to its usual size

[Funinthesun15]

i would probably of helped fold the buggy too, ask if i could do it for you or help you with the bags or baby to do so. theres nothing worse knowing that you are being a hindrance but not being able to do anything about it

The OP had a friend with them. Why they weren't helping is beyond me!

[lorelei9]

Walking - the OP did say the buggy folds.

I know what you mean about some collapsing to a very similar size but surely no one would use those on public transport.

[TamaraLamara]

OP's pram/buggy presumably does as she mentions being unable to collapse it due to space issues, not a non-collapsible design.

[kali110]

No no yanbu. You're blocking the doors and potentially letting people miss their stops, but yanbu
You were blocking the doors, yabu to ask others to use another door when that means they could end up missing their stops.
It's awkward trying to juggle everything, but you can't ask other people to find other ways off the train just because you are there.

abled bodies i really hate this.
Op you do realise people with disabilities don't walk around with stamps on their heads don't you?
I have disabilities however you couldn't tell looking at me!
I certainly wouldn't have managed to get off the train in time if i'd been on it with you!

[goodnightdarthvader1]

I suspect OP thinks her friend should HAVE to help, because everyone should make way for mums.

[Jux]

If the gangway was so clear that people could easily get to the other door, why weren't you standing in it? You'd probably have been offered a seat then. You would also have to stow your bags somewhere else, and your folded buggy.

It does look like you were making a bit of a meal of it, and expecting far too much from busy commuters.

Travel later, when the rush is over.

[SuperCee7]

Most pushchairs fold. If you're going to be using public transport, you get something that folds.

As yes OP, if the train is as busy as you claim then it is too much to ask for someone who has already struggled to make their way to the doors through a crowded train to then turn around and head back along the carriage to other, most likely, equally crowded doors. YABU

[TheCatsMeow]

My friend was holding bags that didn't fit on the buggy we had no room to fold it. If people hadn't pushed on behind us we would have had.

We were going home, like most other people

[Firstmum24]

And for other commuters not to realise that theres a big buggy blocking the door - il just make my way to a clear one - they must be high!!! i avoid buggies when i can - unless theres a mum in need.
But of course its your fault - and you must wrestle the baby and buggy and bags combo when the uncumbered commuters can't display empathy.