To not move on the train?

[TheCatsMeow]

I was on a very busy packed train with my friend and DS. DS was in a sling, we had the buggy and I was feeding him. We were standing by the doors (no one offered us seats!) trying to feed a screaming baby, penned in by others standing. There was no where we could go.

People tried to push past us to get out the doors and nearly sent DS flying. I firmly asked if they could use one of the other doors and I literally couldn't go anywhere. Cue mutterings and dirty looks!

We couldn't collapse the pram there wasn't room to do and as no one had offered a seat we couldn't move anywhere! WIBU to ask them to use another door?

[TheCatsMeow]

Wow. There were people in front of me so I couldn't just get off at each stop. Also how am I supposed to carry a buggy, a baby in a sling, a pram bag, my own bags and feed a baby at the same time?

People with kids are viewed as an inconvenience and it's sad. Instead of able bodied adults walking 5 metres down the aisle it's more acceptable to ask a busy mother with a crying child to repeatedly move.

Damn me having the audacity to have a child!

[OooohHorlicks]

But no-one would ask you to move if you weren't in the way

[LeaLeander]

So you've got a screaming child on a train, AND an open buggy, AND are refusing to let others pass, and you seriously wonder who is being unreasonable in this scenario?

Why couldn't you step off the train to let others pass, fold your buggy while you are out on the platform and step back in when the outbound passengers clear?

[whois]

Don't be such a wet blanket. Why on earth didn't you just ask for s seat?? You've got a bloody baby people would hardly refuse you.

But you are being really U not to have collapsed the buggy.

[LeaLeander]

You managed to get on the train with all that kit so why couldn't you get off with it as well, and make yourself and your belongings more compact?

People who take up more than their fair share of space while causing a blockage in traffic and a disturbance are indeed considered an inconvenience. We ALL are busy and your form of busy-ness does not trump anyone else's.

[MoMoTy]

Also how am I supposed to carry a buggy, a baby in a sling, a pram bag, my own bags and feed a baby at the same time? **

Why couldn't your friend help? Sorry but really that is your own problem. **

[KakiFruit]

OP, it's parents like you that make others view us as an inconvenience. The world is not you and your child, it's everybody. Please listen to the people in this thread...

[lorelei9]

Cat, I realise there's a lot of answers here but I'm still wondering - did people have time to get back to the other doors? you describe a heaving train so they won't have seen you till they got to you.

The people in front of you should have got off the train too from the sounds of it.

but I am still mystified why your friend didn't collapse the buggy. Also, you being a busy mum with a crying child doesn't trump the needs of others who are also on the packed train for a reason....you don't get on a horribly packed train unless you have to, they aren't there for fun.

[TheCatsMeow]

To be fair, if there were people between you and the doors then it doesn't sound as though you were the only ones at fault. The onus is on the people closest to the door to step out and let people off but I know from experience that people instead do a strange leaning thing that gives the impression that they're making an effort but in fact makes no difference to space.

This is what happened I was penned in. I couldn't go anywhere!

[chillycurtains]

Kakifruit I think you are right.

Yes, OP, YWBU. There were two adults and one baby. So your friend should have moved the buddy of the train then back on to let people out or you should have folded the buddy before you got on and your friend could have carried it on and off. It is not acceptable to get people to go the whole length of the carriage because you were not organised enough. The stopping time at stations vary so much at some stops you would not have time to walk the length of the carriage before the doors shut to move off again.

[TheCatsMeow]

You managed to get on the train with all that kit so why couldn't you get off with it as well, and make yourself and your belongings more compact?

Because idiots who didn't understand there was no room piled on behind me so I couldn't back out.

[Sirzy]

What did you plan on doing with the pram if someone offered you a seat then?

I often end up standing on trains with Ds as he uses a special needs buggy so unless we can get the accessible space with a folding seat next to it (which is normally taken by an empty pram with no sign of the owner!) I have no choice but to stand next to him even if there are lots of seats left?

[Snowglobe1]

YABU.

[TheCatsMeow]

It is not acceptable to get people to go the whole length of the carriage

It's hardly a marathon to walk to the other end of the carriage!

[TamaraLamara]

All those people getting off must mean there were empty seats

Begone with your logic!!

None of this makes sense. Friend/you couldn't/didn't fold buggy before getting on train although baby was in sling. People were getting off train yet no addition seats/standing room became available.

[SuperFlyHigh]

OP you said you had a friend with you so don't go all precious on us about doing it all yourself.

Most people I see when there is a buggy at rush hour (rare) do help actually, move down etc but it's give and take or you have to move a buggy.

foldable travel buggy and/ or sling are to what to use in rush hour and don't give me the excuse that you don't realise how busy a train is during Rush hour.

[chillycurtains]

Time to end the thread OP. You don't want to accept most people will not agree with you so this going round in circles with you refusing to listen. Pointless original post.

[TamaraLamara]

Damn me having the audacity to have a child!

Oh stop it!

[TheCatsMeow]

People were getting off train yet no addition seats/standing room became available.

Others got on at other doors and took seats.

[Yokohamajojo]

Well you are not the only one with a child in the world you know! We've all been in stressful situations with our children but the fact is that it was two of you and one baby! seriously, the baby wouldn't be harmed if you gave it to the friend to hold while you collapsed the buggy. It really could have been dealt with better by you!

[Pootles2010]

I thought you said there was you & your friend? So two of you to carry all that.

Damn me for having a child - Do you think you're the only person on MN to have a child?

I know its awkward in these situations, but on a busy train everyone has to get on with it - one person can't block the whole train.

[ShowOfHands]

"Gosh it's busy today, isn't it? Would you mind just moving into the carriage for a second while I fold this buggy and make some more room for us all?"

"Hello. Isn't it nice today? Would you be able to help me fold my buggy please?"

"Morning. Could I ask a favour?"

Something like that next time maybe?

[TheCatsMeow]

one person can't block the whole train. I wasn't blocking the whole train, there's loads of other doors