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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be mad at my asshole boyfriend

180 replies

Whatthecrocodilehat · 11/12/2015 20:04

Been really busy today with poorly baby.
My BF has been texting me and my answers have been short as I have been quite stressed cleaning up projectile vomit all day and doing a trip to hospital.
Basically I didn't ask BF about how his day was and how he is.
When he mentioned that, I said sorry and asked him how he was.
He then goes on to tell me that he had fallen off the roof at work, broken his wrist and gouged his leg down the bone. When I phoned him in a panic he didn't answer so I text him again to ask what the doctors have said.
He said that they said that his misses should always ask how he is so he doesn't need to make up stupid stories.

AIBU to be fucking livid and go over to his and give him a fucking kick in the nuts?!

OP posts:
Whatthecrocodilehat · 12/12/2015 17:38

He is not jealous of my daughter.

OP posts:
Hissy · 12/12/2015 18:11

So you have history of abusive relationships? Which makes you MORE vulnerable to abusers in subsequent relationships. You don't get less vulnerable ever... Unless you do the therapy/groups/hard work to undo the damage that led you there in the first place.

You think you know someone cos you went to school with him? Right oh, I bet all your friends thought your abusive ex was lovely too, because they DIDNT know him in a relationship context. You don't know this guy, not even now.

Did you know that it takes on average 2 years for an abuser to make themselves known? They can usually hold 'playing at normal" together for about a year, but then there will be little traces that in hindsight you'll spot, but not at the time.

He has played a very cruel joke at best, but at worst, he's teaching you that he needs to be uppermost in your mind. Let me tell you clearly, no normal man would do this.

You have delegated your baby's overnight care to a man you don't know well, who has played a very cruel joke at best or is at worst punishing you for caring for your baby.

I'm sorry love, but I feel sick at this situation. You have not done a single thing in your life to recover and put the past behind you, or to give yourself the tools to protect yourself in future.

You are, I fear sleepwalking into a catastrophe. Now with a baby who you now say settles better for a bloke who's been in your life as a partner for months than with you.

With respect. Wtaf do you think you are doing here? You would have to be brain dead to not see that the odds you are playing here are totally stacked against you.

If your child is sick, fuck the Christmas shopping! You have not had a child free day for 3m? And now is the right day to have one? Really?

Whatthecrocodilehat · 12/12/2015 18:18

I'm sorry but what the hell do you know about what I have and haven't done about my previous relation ship? Nothing.
What do you know about my current relationship? Nothing.
So are you saying that fathers are not adequate to look after sick children? Because he is not her biological father I should never leave her in his care ever. Even though he is the one who had stuck around, pays for her, takes her to baby group, clothes her and didn't even think twice about accepting her as his own? He is more than capable of caring her for her for a few hours while I am 5 minutes up the road doing some shopping.
Some people have known their children's real fathers for less time that I have known my boyfriend, should they not be trusted to look after their children either?

OP posts:
JessicaRuby · 12/12/2015 18:43

You have not done a single thing in your life to recover and put the past behind you, or to give yourself the tools to protect yourself in future

Do you know the OP personally Hissy? Hmm

Outcomesthebunnyofdeath · 12/12/2015 19:14

WOW !

This appears to be one of those threads that drags all the LTB merchants along with their baggage. Not just the standard LTB merchants though, but the one's that live their lives through others problems on forums. Is it a power thing ? I don't know, but its pretty ugly.

Loons !

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