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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be mad at my asshole boyfriend

180 replies

Whatthecrocodilehat · 11/12/2015 20:04

Been really busy today with poorly baby.
My BF has been texting me and my answers have been short as I have been quite stressed cleaning up projectile vomit all day and doing a trip to hospital.
Basically I didn't ask BF about how his day was and how he is.
When he mentioned that, I said sorry and asked him how he was.
He then goes on to tell me that he had fallen off the roof at work, broken his wrist and gouged his leg down the bone. When I phoned him in a panic he didn't answer so I text him again to ask what the doctors have said.
He said that they said that his misses should always ask how he is so he doesn't need to make up stupid stories.

AIBU to be fucking livid and go over to his and give him a fucking kick in the nuts?!

OP posts:
lorelei9 · 11/12/2015 20:51

Sheba - exactly!
and OP, even if he is brilliant with your LO, so what? he's just demonstrated that he;s happy to be a complete arse to you with no reason whatsoever.

WhereYouLeftIt · 11/12/2015 20:52

"He's not my DD's father."
So not tied to him then ...

I'd be rethinking the relationship TBH. Not because is was a crap 'joke', but because the thrust of it was that he is the centre of the universe and you exist to bow down before him. Fuck that for a game of soldiers.

BeanGirls · 11/12/2015 20:53

I'd tell him to go fuck himself

2ManySweets · 11/12/2015 20:53

Hear hear sheba

ShebaShimmyShake · 11/12/2015 20:54

And not only did he pull this nasty stunt, it was obviously intended to get you to waste your precious time phoning him instead of attending your sick baby, so that he could passive aggressively ignore you and worry you further.

Fantastic dad, my fat arse.

DonkeyOaty · 11/12/2015 20:55

I would put him back in the sea, tbh.

"Jokes" like that aren't funny - he was testing you, wasn't he. And we all know how he'll use this against you in future.

So. Yanbu to be furious. Yanbu to tell him to piss off permanently.

DonkeyOaty · 11/12/2015 20:57

Or, what Sheba said

SpellBookandCandle · 11/12/2015 20:57

This man has told you who he is, believe him.

TaliZorahVasNormandy · 11/12/2015 21:07

He got whiny at you and told you a cruel lie to make you worried because your worry was with your baby.

That isnt a fantastic father. Someone who was a fantastic father, would also be worried about the baby and would contacting you to find out how YOU are and he wouldnt give a single thought to himself.

Raise your standards, for you and your daughter's sakes.

LilaTheTiger · 11/12/2015 21:08

My DP tried something like this ONCE.

My daughter had had an op and wasn't recovering well, I was worried and getting no sleep.

He unfortunately came down with flu. While I was worried about post op bleeding and debating going back to A&E he decided to lie on the floor and tell me he couldn't feel his hands Hmm

He got VERY short shrift and sent back to bed. I occasionally chucked some meds and water at him, but he soon learned my kid was A1 PRIORITY.

He's unlikely to pull such a stunt again Grin

Oh, you need to bin this dick. He wants to be your number one, let him get away with it and he'll push and push til you don't know who you are any more. Good luck.

AvaCrowder · 11/12/2015 21:15

Who is he a great father to? Not your poorly baby after this. Does he have dc? I can´t imagine a parent doing this.

antimatter · 11/12/2015 21:21

He is attention seeking immature person.

99percentchocolate · 11/12/2015 21:27

He comes across as jealous of your baby. How long have you been together? He is only going to get worse and will escalate his actions.
I have a very bad feeling about this man.
My gut is saying you need to keep him away from her.

Sprink · 11/12/2015 21:35

LilaTheTiger, why does your DP get to do it and stick around but you advise OP to dump her DP?Confused

InSpaceNooneCanHearYouScream · 11/12/2015 21:37

What 99percent said. Run a mile from this prick.

AnyFucker · 11/12/2015 21:38

well, as much as we would love op to dropkick this twat right into a poor quality pizza establishment, it is unlikely

so lila gives good advice, really

give him his warning...he does this again, he is history....but mean it

TheLowKing · 11/12/2015 21:38

He sounds like a total loser.

Original poster
Whatthecrocodilehat · 11/12/2015 21:45

Yes he does have a child and has raised my DD as his own since she was 4 months. I don't want to make any rash decisions while I'm still so angry but I am taking on board all that you're saying.

OP posts:
1frenchfoodie · 11/12/2015 21:47

Sorry, going to buck the trend and say it was a draft, poorly judged wind-up, no more. He may be a waster but this one anecdote doesn't tell me that.

Claraoswald36 · 11/12/2015 21:48

But he's not there with you helping with the baby? Why?

Baconyum · 11/12/2015 21:48

How is he a good father? Does he pay a good amount of cm? How often does he see his child? What does he do with them when they spend time together?

Original poster
Whatthecrocodilehat · 11/12/2015 21:49

Because he's at home with his child.

OP posts:
Claraoswald36 · 11/12/2015 21:53

My dp is at home with his dd but it wouldn't stop him fussing over my dc and I if we were sick and checking on us frequently

InSpaceNooneCanHearYouScream · 11/12/2015 21:55

Has he shown any actual concern for your DD now he knows how poorly she's been? If it was a genuine stupid mistake I'd expect him to be round yours now with flowers, chocs, a teddy for your DD and a very grovelling apology. If not- go with the drop kick

Original poster
Whatthecrocodilehat · 11/12/2015 21:56

He has been checking in, of course he has. It's just because i forgot to ask him how he was that he did the stupid thing. He would be here if he could but hand foot and mouth is very contagious so I've told him to stay at home as we don't want 2 poorly children.

OP posts: