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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

New nursery expects all potential pupils be potty trained, even the 2 year olds.

472 replies

FundraisingPTABitch · 06/12/2015 22:14

That's it really. I'm new to this part of town, and so is this nursery.

When I enquired with the admin about this policy, they said every potential pupil must be potty trained.

AIBU to think this nursery can just fuck off? I will potty train my little child when both the child and I are both ready.

Ludicrous. Irresponsible! Elitist!

OP posts:
hibbleddible · 06/12/2015 22:15

Yanbu. Most two year olds aren't potty trained.

Are there other nursery/childminder options?

DingbatsFur · 06/12/2015 22:18

They probably don't do nappy changing. The pre-school groups here a few years ago took kids from 2 years 11 months provided they were toilet trained.

DPotter · 06/12/2015 22:19

Yes quite ridiculous !

BlackeyedSusan · 06/12/2015 22:19

bit shit if you have achild with special needs then. both mine have additional needs that made potty training later than two.

clareash99 · 06/12/2015 22:19

quite normal rules, in my experience.

SellFridges · 06/12/2015 22:21

My mum ran the playgroup in our village in the mid-80's. Even then any attendee had to be potty trained. So they could start at two, but only if they were trained. I don't think it's a new thing.

Snossidge · 06/12/2015 22:21

They can expect children to be potty trained, but they can't insist.

Artandco · 06/12/2015 22:23

Seems fine. Children can be trained by 2, almost all used to be. You don't have to train your child by 2 years of you don't want, but then you can't choose that nursery. Have to choose which you want

HeadDreamer · 06/12/2015 22:23

I think they probably don't want two year olds. From what I can remember, very few at DD1s nursery were potty trained at 2. Some were still in nappies at 3.

HeadDreamer · 06/12/2015 22:24

I mean those that just turned 2. Many are trained sometime between 2-3yo.

catkind · 06/12/2015 22:24

More to the point, discriminatory? Don't think they'd be allowed to offer the free hours on that basis, which is interesting seeing as they are apparently trying to target firmly at the preschool market. What's the supply and demand for preschool places like where you are?

Out2pasture · 06/12/2015 22:25

please explain how this is ludicrous? most children can be toilet trained around the age of two.
how is it irresponsible? surely stating what they are willing to deal with is very responsible?
elitist....soooooo only a certain segment of society toilet trains their children?
is this a joke or am I being dim and not understanding the innuendoes of the post.

zzzzz · 06/12/2015 22:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

honkinghaddock · 06/12/2015 22:25

They cannot insist children are potty trained. To do so would be discriminatory.

PrinceHansOfTheTescoAisles · 06/12/2015 22:27

Crazy. My ds potty trained just days before starting preschool because they had that rule but he was 3 years 3 months and DEF not ready sooner than that.

Dd started about a year earlier but still was over 2 and more like 2.5 by the time she was reliable.

Presumably if they're taking kids on the 2 year funding, we aren't talking about preschooly "nearly threes" but kids who have literally just turned 2?

LagunaBubbles · 06/12/2015 22:27

you don't have to train your child by 2 if you dont want

You can decide to train by 2 all you want but unless the child's neurological connections are developed it would be pointless.

jipjap · 06/12/2015 22:27

What a load of shit. Pardon the pun!

Ineedapiginblanket · 06/12/2015 22:30

They are going to be clearing up a whole lot of accidents!! After 7 yrs working in early years I learned that children can be toilet trained at 2 but they usually are not reliable at 2 and need lots of support to stay dry and clean!!

One to one at home, maybe fine but in a setting! Lots of wet carpets and furniture.

jipjap · 06/12/2015 22:31

Both my DC were trained (day and night) from 2.5 and by 3 were fully trained with no accidents. I know of a 6 yo who is still wet and has no diagnoses for SN. Tis strange. Please would the wise ones on this thread explain.

ReallyTired · 06/12/2015 22:31

What is your definition of potty trained? Most children can be properly toilet trained before their third birthday. Most people I know trained their children at some point between 30 and 36 months.

I attempted to train dd at 23 months, she understood what was needed, but could only give 5 seconds warning. I kept her nappies and allowed her to use the potty when she choose. She was out of nappies both day and night at about 2 and half.

TwoSmellyDogs · 06/12/2015 22:33

They cannot insist children are potty trained. To do so would be discriminatory

Now you're just being silly. They don't have to accept adults as pupils - is that discriminatory? What about rats? They have feelings too you know.

Discriminatory!

Clayhead · 06/12/2015 22:38

It's discriminatory against children with additional needs who may not be trained at that age.

Snossidge · 06/12/2015 22:38

Excluding a child due to continence issues is discriminatory TwoSmelly, just like you can't say "oh we don't take children with hearing impairments at this school/nursery".

LikeASoulWithoutAMind · 06/12/2015 22:39

It is discriminatory.

There's a whole range of reasons why some children might not be potty trained at 2 or even 3.

littleducks · 06/12/2015 22:39

This is the way it used to be. It is fine for typically developing kids.

But it meant that children with SEN were missing out (hence the discrimination comment) on preschool provision. So the rules were made clear and it isn't allowed anymore.