stalked by school!

[Brioche201]

Last Friday DD was off sick. I start work at 9.30 so got her up and dressed and dropped her round at my parents.When I got to work there was an email on my work email address (which I have NOT given out to them as a contact address), an emaul on my personal email, messages on my mobile and home number and DH's mobile! All before 9.15 wanting to enquire as to DDs whereabouts!! Now DD gets a lift to school every day with another child from the same village (we are 4 miles away from school) so pretty obvious that she hasn't befallen an accident on the way.Infact the secretary would have asked the other child if DD was coming
I am thinking of complaining to the school, as I think it was pretty rude to try to contact me by so many different means especially my work email wanting to know her 'whereabouts'.WTF !!

For example I do not need 7 texts over days telling me about a staff training day. I get it, the schools shut! Nor do I need multiple about opening evenings or that some lucky pupils have been selected to visit some football ground or about inhalers for sports day and nor does The auto dialler have the right to ring me repeatedly until 9pm that night about a lateness until I block the fucker completely. If I don't want the school to have my mobile number then I have the right not to give it.

Don't get me started on the drop everything and rush down with paracetamol for a headache. His grandmother lives next to the school and is a contact ffs.

I think it is brilliant your child's school cares so much about her safty (and perhaps about covering their own backsides - rigtly) that they checked where she was with you, her parent and did not take the word of another pupil.

I am very surprised you are bothered by this and if you had not wanted them to use your work number, you should not have emailed them using it.

Our secondary certainly call if you haven't contacted them.

Do the school know that she comes in with another child? When they are in KS2 and above staff often have no idea how a child gets to school each day.

There are only 50 kids in the whole school, so yes they know!

work email address.

I really don't understand you're ire. You got an email. The whole thing was way moře inconvenient for the school.

Secondary should be calling you too, although the numbers of cba parents are higher, so it's not always possible.

My eldest two are at secondary school
And we get a txt if they don't turn in for registraion

So if it's a legal responsibility, what about secondary schools? they never contact to say your DC isn't at school?

To be honest, I wouldn't know, because I let them know before registration, if my child is off school.Don't most people?

You seem to be deliberately not letting the school know what's going on with your child. Why would you do that?

They do, I certainly remember my mum getting texts and calls from our high school to ask why we weren't there. The system was a bit shit and used to keep phoning even if we'd phoned in. That was annoying.

The secondary schools around here absolutely do contact parents to track down absent students.

I work in an infant school. Generally we expect to hear before 9am if a child will be off sick. Admittedly it's not always possible but the secretary would be phoning well before 10am any absent children's parents simply to check that all is well. I have two boys at primary school and would much prefer they tracked down absent children than left it til the parents contacted them; DS1 gets the bus to school and I'd be eternally grateful that school were chasing him if he hadn't turned up.

Secondary here. Text on first absence by roughly 9:15-9:30

Yes I have contacted them on work email, it doesn't mean I want to hear from them on it.

Why not? What problem does it cause?
Moreover how are the school meant to know that?

I know they are coming from a place of good intentions, but really a bit of common sense is needed!

The crux of the issue here is what time they expect to be informed by. 9.15 is after registration. They don't want to mark your child absent without consent or good reason so try to contact you to find out. I suspect you will find cut off time is 9am or something.

We have a phone line with an answer machine - phone up, leave message job done takes all of 30 seconds. Could easily have been done at some point prior to work arrival.

The using none provided contact details eg work email is a bit off in my personal view but I am also of the mind of even though I have a mobile it doesn't mean you can talk to me 24/7. Another one that gets peed off with all the guff schools send out about jumper day, cake day, maths day, reminders for wellies for forest school blah blah blah

It is not X's responsibility to tell the school. Some parents would complain if the word of a child was taken.

"Oh no we didn't realise your daughter got run over - no she didn't come to school but we didn't bother alerting you because Lacie-May said she had a cold and wasn't coming to school so we took her word for it".

"what about secondary schools? they never contact to say your DC isn't at school?"

Oh yes they do. I always email school if DD isn't going to be in. In the past they haven't been quick enough off the mark to read emails and I have had texts from school asking where DD is. It's a jolly good thing that they do this because I don't take her to school and I would want to know if she hadn't turned up.

Why couldn't you have rung or emailed the school before you set off?

Schools can't win
If they don't provide information they are accused of poor communication
If they send lots of texts and try and keep people in the loop then that's too much as well
What the fuck are they meant to do?
One parents over communication is another parents not enough information
I feel sorry for school
Staff

I'm very impressed that they went to that extent to locate your child's whereabouts. Excellent.
Goes without saying that they should have been informed. My son is only in Reception so I'm pleased posters have highlighted the fact that we need to inform school early.

This brings back memories of being a school attendance officer. I had to start calling all unauthorised absences by 10.30 each day. I dreaded it!

Parents were often really defensive and sometimes rude. I had to try every contact detail we had, school policy.

See my post ^^. That is a secondary school!

Yes, the common sense (and courtesy) to know you're creating someone work if you don't let them know in good time

"Stalked" is such a horrible word as well - the subtext being that they are doing it for a nasty spiteful reason.

I am totally gobsmacked that you think the school shouldn't have contacted you about your missing daughter at work. Should they have waited until your coffee break or would you expect them to wait until you had annual leave booked before being told that your child is unaccounted for. I just can't believe that anybody would think the school was out of order here.

(And likewise, my dcs' secondary school contacts us without fail by 9.15 if the dc hasn't arrived.)

I know they are coming from a place of good intentions, but really a bit of common sense is needed!

Yes, common sense is needed on your behalf.

Phone in on time and stop expecting them to take the word of another child.

Dd's secondary had random truancy sweeps. They were obliged to give details of all unauthorised absences and they were visited by attendance officer plus a police officer!