Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

hi maybe i am aibu or i need to vent dp rant

203 replies

creamponies · 09/11/2015 15:04

hi just joined today,
been with my dp for 4 years, i do love him but he is a bit twisted. can be quite cold, doesn't really express but he does love me in his own way ish. we have no kids but there are issues in are end.
so my rant is i love holidays yes cant afford them but will scrape any money for it .
oh i love the freedom and seeing new or old places. anyway not by the want of trying i love him to either to "whisk" me away or either go half's or whatevers so in 4 years i have brought him twice. and we had a nice time he had a couple of exs before me and they were usually either dumped him after the holidays or him to them (sick i know).

he always had a decent excuse of why he cant go or book for the last 6 months i couldn't really take time off as i started a course or when he was sick and i supported him he owned me a weekend away at least. we had the conversation we have to do this or that or go here or there and his responses is we will. Well i introduced a timeline i wanted to go away on the bank hoilday weekend in august. and he said he was "looking" for a holiday break i wanted him to book me a place as he be moany and i don't want to go to b and bs either.

the date came and passed said everything is booked out blah blah i forgave him but expressed you have bank holiday weekend in October the week before he said he couldn't do that week as he work things but the week after would be Halloween and you to the weekend away. I said yes of course anything it would have been great us out on halloween together. We dont live together and we rarely have intimacy time together . and i have refused to have it in my house as it was always in my house.

so i kept asking him have you booked it yet? he said to me im still looking. so i said well you want to hurry up and he mentioned about this place and i said yeah i go there where is the hotel? he told it was a b and b and i went to him sorry i dont do b and bs. well at half 3 on friday he told me that he didnt book it and it was all my fault. as he dont do hoildays and i had loads. i said yes but not with my dp im sick of going with my friends i wanted to go with you.
he siad im saving up for a house? im like a house for you but i wont be living with a man that wont or either take me away we havent spoken that weekend spend Halloween on my own. On Monday he rang me and siad i take you away for new year and i said no either you book something for this week or the next but i wont be hanging out with you unless you book a weekend away in the next week or 2. his best offer was a few weeks after Christmas and im like no because you come up with a different excuse by then since then we havent spoken to each other he hasn't even text hello i dont know im running out of patience. how can he be so cold and im like the bad wolf that all i wanted was for him to take me away as i paid for the last holiday

OP posts:
firesidechat · 09/11/2015 16:39

eccentric

Has the spell checker gone awol?

SoupDragon · 09/11/2015 16:39

If you want a holiday book a bloody holiday. It's not rocket science.

OurBlanche · 09/11/2015 16:43

Oh, Soup... she did, but with mates cos he didn't do it for her, at least not in a not B+B!

Keep up, there's a dear Smile

[apologises before hitting the Post button, really doesn't want to piss a SoupDragon off, but the moment was there and I just had to take it... Grin ]

Sodder · 09/11/2015 16:47

After reading five pages of this, I've concluded that putting a ship in a bottle would be quicker than trying to decipher this thread. Confused

As far as I can ascertain, the Op is pissed off because her boyfriend lives with his mother, insists on having sex in a car and will only take the OP on holiday if they stay in a B&B.

73dexter · 09/11/2015 16:47

I've never been whisked away or had sex in a car Sad

Arkkorox · 09/11/2015 16:47

I feel like I want to buy your do a pint and congratulating him on surviving 4 years with you....

Arkkorox · 09/11/2015 16:48

Dp not do Hmm

PegsPigs · 09/11/2015 16:48

He's just not that into you. LTB.

Vixxfacee · 09/11/2015 16:57

The best thread I've seen on here for ages.

BarbarianMum · 09/11/2015 16:57

For all those calling him a "mummy's boy" the guy has recently (we assume) been in hospital for 6 months. I imagine that would result in many single people ending up back home with their parents. Notice the OP's living with her mum and no one's slagging her off for it.

ExitPursuedByABear · 09/11/2015 16:58

Is there a spell checker on here?

Sallystyle · 09/11/2015 17:04

Book your own holiday
Stop moaning when he does book you a holiday
Grow up about not having sex in a house
Leave him because you are clearly unhappy
Don't resent someone for visiting them in hospital and think it makes you deserving of a holiday

NotTheSpiceOfLife · 09/11/2015 17:04

Well I've been whisked away AND had sex in cars. Then again, I am a bit of a slag ConfusedGrin

KitKat1985 · 09/11/2015 17:09

To be honest sex in cars isn't all it's cracked up to be. Rolling your naked arse onto a gear stick lever is an awkward experience.

NeedsAsockamnesty · 09/11/2015 17:09

op are the issues you are talking about learning disabilities or anything else that may impact on how you express yourself?

Weathergames · 09/11/2015 17:13

Yeah but that's why you get into the back and have sex on the back seat - surely?

3sugarsplease · 09/11/2015 17:24

You don't do B&B's but you also don't get your leg over...

Maybe your should ditch your high accommodation standards in aid of a night of hanky panky Grin

emotionsecho · 09/11/2015 17:29

This is about as clear as mud and as far removed from a relationship as it's possible to be.

creamponies · 09/11/2015 17:32

omg never in my life reading forums. never in my whole life that a post from English to be translated into English. that has to be a mm classic.
he had a rotten accident about 2 years and he nearly died a few times

i was there for him. T here to show my support to him. in all that time his family who were not very pleasant at most.

weren't too nice to me. i visited him every day i spent 2 hrs travelling on public transport just to be there for him. spent a fortune just getting his favorite treats, buses, IN ALL that time that i saw him in hospital never once asked me did i got home ok? have i got enough for the bus fare as im not (working) and he needs this and that and get it for him. but they did find the time to tell me why you didnt visit him during christmas week err hello there was no buses running.

IM bout 15 years younger to him im in my early 30s he is in his mid 40s. We are not married but he does behave that he is in a married person tbh.
I went out for a year before i was introduced to his parents. he still has single satus on facebook. i love him but according to his ex that he tried to cop off after he had his accident can be a bit twisted that bit (broke my heart) he said he was depressed i gave him another chance.

im just jealous my friend is going out with someone within 6 months they have been around Ireland and other countries i barly made to the next town with him

OP posts:
firesidechat · 09/11/2015 17:36

Is there a spell checker on here?

There used to be, but I've been on a break, so maybe it's gone.

Gruntfuttock · 09/11/2015 17:37

"We are not married but he does behave that he is in a married person"

What? Confused

firesidechat · 09/11/2015 17:39

I mean this seriously op, the lack of a decent holiday is the very least of your problems.

SlaggyIsland · 09/11/2015 17:39

I'm a bit dizzy after reading that... it's given me brain blur.

creamponies · 09/11/2015 17:39

just to clarify this he has never booked me the b and b. as he knew i would not stay there. i like the idea of just checking in and that it you can go as you please. The idea of staying in someone bedroom is like yuck. i have booked and paid for the holidays although we had a good time he didnt like the area that we stayed. So i said you can book it.

OP posts:
PatriciaHolm · 09/11/2015 17:40

Oh FFS. Life is too short. You're not happy, he's not happy, move on. Unless you like having all the dramaaaaaaa to talk about....