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AIBU to be a bit disapointed - Ring related

165 replies

Greenkit · 15/08/2015 14:04

Ok so my snooping has brought up something which has disappointed me and it's my own fault I guess.

It was our 20th Wedding Anniversary this week and as its either china or platinum I bought DH a platinum disk of the album which contains our song. He presented me with a beautiful platinum eternity ring. We also went away for the week and had a lovely time.

While we were away we spoke about our presents and I said how lovely the ring was and how expensive it probably was, as I had looked at platinum rings for him but in the end settled on the disc, which still cost ?100. (I didn?t tell him the price).

Anyway, I know where he bought the ring from and today I had a look on the website, it was ?119, which isn?t the disappointing bit as price just doesn?t matter. But it?s a white gold ring, not platinum, which he kind of led me to believe, even if he didn?t say the words.

So AIBU to be a tidy bit disappointed, even though I love the ring?

OP posts:

EatDessertFirst · 15/08/2015 14:06

YABU. And a bit bratty. Sorry!


TheFallenMadonna · 15/08/2015 14:07

I thought platinum was 75 years.

He could have given you a mug...


googoodolly · 15/08/2015 14:07

Does it really matter?


TobleroneBoo · 15/08/2015 14:07

Maybe you shouldn't have looked it up?


foslady · 15/08/2015 14:09

Yes - YABU, he went out the way to buy you a gift that you love.......or did until it was the wrong metal......severely unreasonable


YUDOTHIS · 15/08/2015 14:09

Jesus fucking christ I'd love to have your problems


laffymeal · 15/08/2015 14:10

It could have been a lot worse, he could have got you a teapot Grin


TheHormonalHooker · 15/08/2015 14:11

20th is china, 70th is platinum.

YABU and a bit of a brat imo. Sorry.


FabULouse · 15/08/2015 14:11

This reply has been deleted

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TheFallenMadonna · 15/08/2015 14:12

Have you already done silver, ruby and gold? An accelerated anniversary thing?


LaurieFairyCake · 15/08/2015 14:13


What's the point of a platinum anniversary without platinum?

It's a very cheap ring, is it rolled gold ie. coated ?


Fourarmsv2 · 15/08/2015 14:14

Apparently platinum is the 'modern' 20th present. No doubt inspired by jewellery companies ;)


Hipotle · 15/08/2015 14:15

YABU. Stop overthinking the (literally!) materialistic aspect and celebrate the things which actually matter. The relationship, the fact you were given a lovely gift, the fact you had a lovely holiday. You're ruining it for yourself.

And in the nicestish possible way, there really are a LOT worse things which could happen to a person check any newspaper if further detail needed so I reckon this is a count your blessings moment tbh.


HermioneWeasley · 15/08/2015 14:15

As others have said, 20 years is China, so technically you've been upgraded


laffymeal · 15/08/2015 14:17

It's my 30th anniversary next month, can anyone tell me what "thing" it is so I can look forward to getting nothing to do with it from dh, disclaimer we ignore anniversaries


CiderwithBuda · 15/08/2015 14:17

Happy Aniversary. It was our 20th this week too.

TheFallenMadonna - 20 years is traditionally China but the modern interpretation is Platinum. I found that on an American website and am embracing multiculturalism!

Op - I kind of see where you are coming from. I got DH really good knives. Not platinum but the same colour. I am having the diamonds from my old engagement ring (I upgraded a few years ago) made into either an eternity ring or a pendant. I'd like platinum but given that the trend for platinum for this or any anniversary is not set in stone I will be happy with white gold. It looks pretty much the same after all.

If DH had said "look I'd like to get you platinum but can afford something nicer if I go for white gold" what would you have said?


Sodder · 15/08/2015 14:17

YABU. I wouldn't give two fucks about it TBH.


NerrSnerr · 15/08/2015 14:17

What a dick only spending £119 on a gift that you love. I'd leave him.


MustBeLoopy390 · 15/08/2015 14:18

Yabu, in the end it shouldn't matter about the gifts. Just enjoy being together. IMO it seems people get so caught up in the materialistic side of it all and forget the real meanings.


WorraLiberty · 15/08/2015 14:18


I'm in floods of tears here on your behalf Thanks xxxxxxxxxx


Greenkit · 15/08/2015 14:18

Thank you for the replies. I guess it does make me sound a brat, but I am not I promise, my first engagement ring cost about ?50, I am not one to wear lots of rings etc. Im jeans and t-shirt kind of girl.

The ring is lovely and I do love it, my 'disapointment' is more he could have told me it was white gold, instead of allowing me to think it was platinum. I wouldnt have cared, I dont care.

He could have just put me straight is all.

20years is Old: China - New: Platinum

OP posts:

Enjoyingthepeace · 15/08/2015 14:19

Married twenty years, and you are posting something like this?

Yes, it was a bit odd that he allowed you to believe that platinum.

But more odd that the following day you went online to check out how much he spent.

Twenty years you say? The mind boggles about the tensions that you two must have experienced over the years.


TheHormonalHooker · 15/08/2015 14:21

Lists of wedding anniversary gifts vary by country. The traditional and modern U.S. versions were compiled by librarians at the Chicago Public Library.
From Wikipedia

The OP has got her knickers in a twist over something that a group of people working in a library decided. Ridiculous!


clam · 15/08/2015 14:21

30th is pearl.
40th is ruby.
50th gold.
60th diamond.


ilovesooty · 15/08/2015 14:22

I find it difficult to comprehend why it matters if you love the ring.

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