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AIBU to not offer my daughter's friend something else for tea?

156 replies

matrix11 · 07/07/2015 17:36

Daughter has a friend over for tea, done a simple tea of wraps with southern fried chicken, dips, bread sticks, grapes, grated cheese, nice selection of salad, nothing fancy but your basic salad, i am sat in the next room listening to her moan how she does not like anything there, apart from the cheese.
I am not going to get up and offer her anything else i am sick to the back teeth of having friends over who won't eat anything except for pizza, chips, crisps or chocolate.
I always try to do a nice simple but healthy tea, not just for mine but for friends too but they always moan, i avoid things like cottage pies, chilli etc when friends are round as i know its wasted, i would go mad if i knew my kids were ungrateful with what they were given, when i was growing i loved going to my friends and ate whatever was put in front of me.
It's not just a one off either, it is most of their friends?!

OP posts:

KoalaDownUnder · 07/07/2015 17:38

How old are they?

They sound bloody rude, anyway. I'd never have carried on like that as a guest at someone's house.


hhhhhhh · 07/07/2015 17:39

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DoreenLethal · 07/07/2015 17:39

Gawd I'd not stand for that! I'd be in there, whip her plate away and give her bread and water.


pollyisnotputtingthekettleon · 07/07/2015 17:39

Would agree ,...plenty of choice there. I have a DF who cooks tea, if they dont want it will cook something else even when DC had the choice in the first place ! Take it or leave it here too.


AuntyMag10 · 07/07/2015 17:39

Yanbu what a rude girl. No manners at all. This fusspot is probably pandered to at home that's why she can be fussy so freely at someone else's without a thought.


rubyslippers · 07/07/2015 17:39

Actually I think YABU (a bit)

Loads of kids are fussy eaters - I would much rather ask the parent of their kid has any likes or dislikes and cater accordingly

The odd pizza is not a big deal IMO

Alternatively let her moan and her parents can feed her when she come home


KoalaDownUnder · 07/07/2015 17:40

Have you met any of the parents, and do they seem ignorant?!

I just thought these manners were drummed into kids at home. But maybe not anymore. Sad


Frusso · 07/07/2015 17:40

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Uhplistrailer · 07/07/2015 17:40

That sounds like a good selection of food there. She must be really picky if the cheese is the only thing she likes.

I wouldn't offer anything else either.


MammaTJ · 07/07/2015 17:40

My fussy pair would've happy with that! YANBU!


mousmous · 07/07/2015 17:40

you provided a good selection and they will not go hungry.


DeidreChambersWhatACoincidence · 07/07/2015 17:41

Yadnbu. It sounds a lovely meal. How incredibly rude.


ollieplimsoles · 07/07/2015 17:41

God if I thought my child was behaving that way at someone else's house when food had been laid out to them I would be horrified and so embarrassed!


YeOldTrout · 07/07/2015 17:42

I under 8yo then I think YABU.


Justmuddlingalong · 07/07/2015 17:44

If the tea you provided isn't suiting her, there's no point in her being there for tea. Time to send her home.


LazyLouLou · 07/07/2015 17:44

As a kid I would have loved to be offered something like that.

I had one friend whose mum only ever offered beans on toast: I hate baked beans and don't like anything poured over toast, sit whatever it is next to the toast and I will be happy Smile

Another used to cook up lovely stuff, like liver and kidneys, mountain of creamy mash. Now I loved it, but my friend stopped inviting me: her mum made it as a special treat and my friend hated both.

Thinking about it I don't think parents ever get that right!


Theycallmemellowjello · 07/07/2015 17:44

How old is she? Not U to not make anything else, but if you're in the next room then I wouldn't judge her for saying she doesn't like it - I doubt she realises she's in earshot. She can't help her tastes.


LashesandLipstick · 07/07/2015 17:45

Why didn't you ask her what she wanted? Hmm whenever I had friends over my mum would always ask to avoid this very issue


pollyisnotputtingthekettleon · 07/07/2015 17:45

My DS -suffered- pizza at a friends as he hates cheese .... bless didnt want to fuss.


morelikeguidelines · 07/07/2015 17:46

Can I come for tea? Sounds lovely !


matrix11 · 07/07/2015 17:51

She is 9, very nearly 10.

Her mum is lovely and i don't think she will be happy with what she has eaten, i will let her mum know when she comes to collect her, that she would not eat anything i laid out for tea.
I have just cleared the table and asked what she ate, said she was not hungry so ate a bit of grated cheese!
My youngest daughter had a friend last week who only ate a squeeze yoghurt and an orange, i told her mum too.
I just do not get it, are kids really that fussy now or just rude!

OP posts:

Theycallmemellowjello · 07/07/2015 17:52

"said she was not hungry so ate a bit of grated cheese" - actually that is a rather diplomatic response (especially for a 9 year old), not rude at all.


MrsDeVere · 07/07/2015 17:54

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MayPolist · 07/07/2015 17:54

I usually run it past the child to make sure they like what i have planned for tea.
They are GUESTS


Hulababy · 07/07/2015 17:54

Sounds like plenty of choice. I assume the wraps were DIY so she could have chosen to have just plain cheese if she didn't like the chicken.

I often did DIY type meals for dd and her friends. We called it a rainbow salad big plater of salad, veggies, olives, bread or wraps, some cheese, cold meat, etc. Most children could find something they liked.

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