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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

list of sexual partners

289 replies

maxxytoe · 27/06/2015 21:44

so i was over at my friends house earlier this evening. I don't know how we got onto the topic, but she keeps a list of her 'sexual conquests' in the notes on her iPhone Hmm in chronological order
She claims this is normal and everyone has a list
I am confused
Should I have been keeping tabs? Grin

OP posts:
TheLastPickleInTheJar · 28/06/2015 09:37

"Why do you shag people you can't even remember the names of?"

Makes no sense at all!

I agree with a pp that this thread has comforted me somewhat. I can't remember my number. I can't remember all my past partners. I've felt ashamed in the past. Why? Because our patriarchal society tells us that we should, that's why!

I think I'm going to go with 'more than the Queen, fewer than Madonna'. Thanks for that one! Not that I think anyone will ever ask me now. I haven't had that conversation in rl since i was about 18!

LibrariesGaveUsPower · 28/06/2015 09:52

That Queen/Madonna thing is from Four Weddings and Funeral. Grin

Why do people shag people they can't even remember the names of- I couldn't care less if people remember the names of people they've slept with. I do think it's odd not to remember, but to care enough that you won't remember that you keep a list. I mean, there isn't going to be a test. If you don't remember, you don't remember, what's the point? Confused

OhMrGove · 28/06/2015 10:29

I don't think my phone has enough memory space...

Melonfool · 28/06/2015 10:42

I had a mental list til it got over 20, then I made a decision not to keep track any longer. So, no list, and no idea how many, couldn't name them all, probably don't remember them all

Had a bf once who had a paper list, was a bit odd when I found it.

beedeepullen · 28/06/2015 10:44

does she have a list of how many times she has been to the sexual health clinic too??

because some one who has had too many partners to remember by mind may have caught a STI or two (geese I feel sick)

keeping a list is not normal.

there's a name for girls who sleep around and I am sorry to say but she sounds like a slag!

she may regret when she is older dropping her nickers more than Dr-Dre drops a beat

CrystalHaze · 28/06/2015 10:47

Careful you don't hoik your judgey-pants up so far that you accidentally throttle your good self, BeeDee Hmm

formerbabe · 28/06/2015 10:48

there's a name for girls who sleep around and I am sorry to say but she sounds like a slag!

How charming! Is there a name for men who sleep around too? Or is it just women that you have an issue with?

Garlick · 28/06/2015 10:49

Shock "girls who sleep around"???!!! Grin

The 1890s called to say they've gone home without you.

keeptothewhiteline · 28/06/2015 10:51

beedee- so I take it you have only had sex within marriage?

BreacaBoudica · 28/06/2015 10:52

Beedee - take your goose and DFOD. Who says women who have slept with a lot of people don't have safe sex?!?!?!

Ouchbloodyouch · 28/06/2015 10:53

beedee I've lost count. Deal with it! Fun times and safe times were had!

DarthVadersTailor · 28/06/2015 10:54

Even if I wanted to keep a list I couldn't genuinely remember exactly who would be on it (more to do with being off my face in my youth rather than volume) but as a grown adult why would you want to anyway? Sure if you're a young teen you might do this but an adult doing this just seems weird.

YANBU.

Bunbaker · 28/06/2015 10:56

It's the first I have ever heard of such a thing. Besides, when I was young, free and single mobile phones hadn't been invented. I think these things were called notches on your bed post in those days Grin

HesterShaw · 28/06/2015 10:58

It was "More than Princess Di, less than Madonna"

and she should have said fewer.

Loved his response "....and I'm just some git who has only slept with nine people..."

Garlick · 28/06/2015 11:08

why would you want to anyway?

In my case, because I'd realised I was starting to forget them Grin I wanted each to have his own small, treasured space in my memory - or at least on a list - but that went pear-shaped in between H1 and H2. Oh, I had a good time ... as far as I remember.

LibrariesGaveUsPower · 28/06/2015 11:09

So it was Hester, I stand corrected.

abearcalledpaddington · 28/06/2015 11:12

I dont think it has anything to do with self esteem or respect really, i wanted to do it, i wasnt in a relatioship with anyone and as far as i knew neither were any of the men i slept with.

fastdaytears · 28/06/2015 11:13

beedee are you for real? I really hope you don't have DD to hear that. What the hell is the difference between a girl who "sleeps around" and a boy. Who is the OP's friend hurting with her varied sex life.

And as for the STIs ODFOD. What a horrible thing to say. There is nothing at all to suggest that she's not using protection and getting checked. IME the people who take risks are of the it-won't-happen-to-me-I've-only-slept-with-x-blokes brigade. If you're active with multiple partners or short term partners then you're not going to be complacent with condoms are you?

Wideopenspace · 28/06/2015 11:23

Wow! I find it unbelievable that there are women on here that think the 'slag'/STI type comments are ok.

Why is deciding to have sex with a consenting other person any mark of lack or self respect or morality? I'd say judging someone else by that measure points to a flaw in your moral code.

GlitzAndGigglesx · 28/06/2015 11:37

Another dumb fuck who thinks it takes multiple romps to catch an STI. Have a listen to Can't Hold Us Down then apologise for the slag comment

ShipShapeAhoy · 28/06/2015 11:38

because some one who has had too many partners to remember by mind may have caught a STI or two (geese I feel sick)

I can't remember all my sexual partners and I've never had an sti. You do realise you can sleep with just one person and still catch an sti?

reallywittyname · 28/06/2015 11:42

Ok so apart from all the judging, does anyone else think it would be FAB to find one of these in a trolley? Grin

Example
"No. 8, Dave from sales, naice thaighs"

Roussette · 28/06/2015 11:44

There's nothing wrong with geese, leave them alone Grin

I've had numerous sexual partners too many to remember and I have never had an STI. Ridiculous comment.

Garlick · 28/06/2015 11:44

Grin witty

"11. The Yoni Massage bloke."

Wideopenspace · 28/06/2015 11:45

"25. The one who kept his socks on"

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