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AIBU?

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Original poster

Hen party snub

138 replies

Antonia87 · 20/06/2015 13:27

I am currently organising my Hen Do and really think it would be hilarious to hire a butler in the buff to serve drinks and organise games. However, one of my long time good friends has stated that she wont be coming if we do hire one as its tacky and against her principles. I was rather offended as I thought everyone would rather enjoy it and its not like hiring a stripper. I'm sure we will be more embarrassed than him!

OP posts:
OwlsEscapade · 20/06/2015 18:11

I would decline too. I am not a prude but I can't stand the tackiness of it.

LauraDec · 20/06/2015 18:21

My friends hired one for my hen and we all loved him! He was so nice.

I had a really mixed group with all my mates and mum, mum in law and aunts. We'd hired a cottage and had food catered for one of the nights. To my surprise this guy turned up. He was just so lovely and amazingly hot. We played games and he had to pour me shots for every question I got wrong. He whispered in my ear he'd make the next lot water as he could tell I wasn't handling the pure vodka well. He danced and partied with us and told all my lovely friends and family all about himself. It was great. I'd totally recommend Butler in the Buff.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 20/06/2015 18:24

It wouldn't be my thing either but I wouldn't decline. It's your hen night your choice and all about you.
It's not about other peoples principles. It's your day.

reni1 · 20/06/2015 18:26

But a resounding YES to the cocktail maker party idea, OP, what a fun thing to do.

MitzyLeFrouf · 20/06/2015 18:31

Cocktail maker - excellent idea

Cocktail making class - have been to one, it was dull

Nanny0gg · 20/06/2015 18:38

It's not about other peoples principles. It's your day.

This is true as long as others' views are taken into account and no-one is offended or upset because someone declines the invitation.

Pipbin · 20/06/2015 18:40

I don't know if I could accept a drink from someone if I could see his penis - not including DH.
In fact I have no desire to see anyones penis, drinks or otherwise.

MitzyLeFrouf · 20/06/2015 18:44

They have an apron covering their penis. It's just their arse on display.

Pipbin · 20/06/2015 18:48

OK, i don't really want to see their bums either tbh.

Floggingmolly · 20/06/2015 19:02

I don't know if that makes it better or worse, Mitzy!! Why would a bare arse add so much to the ambience? It'd put me right off my drink.

MitzyLeFrouf · 20/06/2015 19:03

The ones I saw were quite orange. And I don't want to be mean....................but one of the bums was clearly past its Naked Butler best.

hotfuzzra · 20/06/2015 19:05

Omg I really fancy a shitload of cocktail s now!

CrispyFern · 20/06/2015 19:13

I'd rather go somewhere where there was a tasty drinks maker, than a guy with his arse hanging out.

cerealqueen · 20/06/2015 19:15

If you'd be Ok with your DP hiring a naked girl to serve drinks and titillate him and be seen as an object, then yeah, go for it Hmm

notnowImreading · 20/06/2015 19:21

I went to a hen do where we had a butler in the buff. It was mortifying. He had a spotty arse and talked about his romantic troubles and his arguments with his mum all night (he was about 21) and everyone ended up feeling like his very uncomfortable great aunt and giving him sound advice.

BerylStreep · 20/06/2015 19:23

I think tacky too. I'd probably go, but would be cringing inside.

CaptainHolt · 20/06/2015 19:29

I know a butler in the buff, he is not a good conversationalist. He boasts about how all the women are begging to shag him Hmm.

I can't get my head around paying people to take their clothes off. How is that fun? It's not boring to get your kicks making strangers do weird things for cash.

pictish · 20/06/2015 19:32

A cocktail maker sounds great! I'd love that!

I hate Carry On films btw. All that ooh err missus and fnarr fnarr nonsense leaves me cold.

ReginaBlitz · 20/06/2015 19:34

Wow aren't you all a barrel of laughs! Go for it op if your friend is boring who wants her there anyway!

WaferInMyCoffee · 20/06/2015 19:40

I think I would find it a bit awkward. But I'm not a prude and I do enjoy a "show". It's the up close and personal that I wouod find awkward, but I would probably feel like that about loads of things - ive been to a do with a magician who went round tables and I really didn't enjoy it, up close and personal, pick a card, I found it awkward and anxiety inducing, that is my personal issue of course but I can understand the feeling of not wanting to be involved if something like that is happening.

A show on a stage though, magicians or naked people (naked magicians?!!) I wouldn't have a problem with and would enjoy.

WanderWomble · 20/06/2015 19:53

I think it's tacky and a bit gross. I'd decline too.

stillnotjustamummy · 20/06/2015 20:03

We hired one! He was a charming chap. We then felt really bad when we saw him dressed afterwards to go home and realised he was all of 19 or so and we were old enough to be his mum. Hmmmm.

FarFromAnyRoad · 20/06/2015 20:05

Is it a 'tackle out' situation? When you say 'in the buff' - it's what? Schlong flapping in the wind?
No no and a million times NO.

Considering that the average meat and two veg looks about as appealing as the last turkey in the shop on Christmas Eve I can't even begin to think why anyone would think this a good idea! Grin

Gabilan · 20/06/2015 20:09

"Wow aren't you all a barrel of laughs! Go for it op if your friend is boring who wants her there anyway!"

Why the "you're boring" taunt? It strikes me as a kind of peer pressure. "Like this or we'll say you're boring". In which case fine, I'm happy to be boring. I'm happy that I'm not comfortable with objectifying anyone, male or female. I'm happy that my sense of humour doesn't revolve around having a naked butler serve me drinks. I'm happy that I can sometimes be silly and sometimes be serious, and that none of that revolves around paying someone to be naked.

If you want to call me boring, fine. My idea of fun obviously isn't yours. You have fun doing whatever it is you think is fun. Me, I'll go and find out about natural horsemanship; or bats and osmosis; or I'll read a Terry Pratchett novel; I'll ponder the ontological status of the electron or wonder what's on special in Lidl. Live and let live. It really would be boring if we were all the same.

Nanny0gg · 20/06/2015 20:15

or I'll read a Terry Pratchett novel

Now that's a plan!!