To think less of my friend? (And to ask what puts you off a person)

[MonkeyPJs]

I have been friends with a woman for a while now, but recently, while in a cafe, she was awful to the wait staff after the service was a little slow (it was busy) talking to them like they were sub-human, and being rude and demanding. It was embarrassing! Ever since then I've thought less of her, and now not so sure I want to be close friends with someone who can be so unkind to others. She's always been nice to me, though.

AIBU to think less of her because of this one event? She wasn't having a bad day to my knowledge, and was perfectly pleasant to me both before and after talking to the waitress - as if nothing were wrong.

If IANBU, is there anything else that makes you think less of someone like this?

Same as the OP - why in the U.K there's so much pathetic snobbery about hospitality staff is beyond me.

Also, people who don't like reading books I've little time for and certainly would never be friends with.

I think being unfailingly polite to waiting/serving staff is the sign of a true gentleperson (is there such a word - you know what I mean)

The book thing on MN is very funny.

People who separate/divorce and then go on and on on FB about how wonderful their new partner is and how they have never felt love like this before . These people often have DCs . How does that make them feel about their parents' relationahip?
I once went to a wedding (work colleague) where the reading said something similar . They have 4 children from previous marriages between them .

Sunny, yes, yes to trampy nest hair you wouldn't blow your nose on!

People who set up false equivalences (eg only baby names that are currently not used much can possibly be beautiful).

Irrationality that won't own up to being irrational in general, really.

Eg - Sunny's Harry Potter thing I'm sure she'll admit is irrational - a rational stance might be not having time for people who read any children's books. (Not one I agree with, but defensible).

I have plenty of irrational quirks and views, but I try to own them.

I don't mind if other people don't read books - but I find I have little in common with those who don't read much. It's a useful indicator of whether I'm likely to get on with someone.

People that don't vaccinate, people that rate / read fifty shades, gone girl, ugh da Vinci code. People that don't call them selves feminists. People that use alternative medicine. Seriously all of the above educate yourselves.

I had a drink with an educated, professional woman neighbour the other night who was complaining about her difficulties in career progression due to having her baby. She then came out with "I'm not one of these feminists, you know hating men.. But.."
Where do these views come from ?!!
I really went off her immediately. I wanted to educate her but I know she would get defensive.

It's such a shame to read on here that so many people would dismiss me based on things so peripheral to who I am and what I could offer a friendship in their lists of things they don't like.

In my OP I was talking about things that revealed something about someone's character, not their interests. I have loads of friends with different tastes to mine, as wouldn't the world be so boring if we were all friends with people with the exact same tastes as us?

Do some of you think that your character is somehow defined by your interests? I don't think it is - whether or not I am a good person and a good friend isn't dictated by whether I've read Gone Girl or not

overseasexpat, the irony of demanding people educate themselves when you are using 'people that....'

Rudeness generally, specifically when you're talking to someone and they take a call on their mobile, keep on talking for ages while you sit like a lemon. How is somebody at a distance more important/interesting than someone sitting right in front of you? What's wrong with calling them back later? AIBU to think that taking the time to visit someone in person should make me more important than someone sitting on their bum at home?

Men who flirt with waitresses. Their not interested they are doing their job

They are not interested! Not their :)

Cockbollocks I know someone like that. She's quite disturbingly vindictive, one girl she fell out with is a nurse and she spent half an hour in my company discussing ways she could get her struck off by reporting her. The pleasure on her face as she thought of ways she could ruin this other persons life was genuinely freaky and ive since distanced myself.

A very thin friend who was going to go to a fancy dress party as another woman she didn't like, other woman is overweight and she was going to buy a fat suit and get a wig to look like her
She didn't do it in the end but I've never felt the same about her since

Ovaryhill - wow! Part of me wishes that she had, can you imagine the shick on folks faces - she'd probably have shot herself in the foot with that one!

Yes she def would bam, it's just cruel, I can't understand why someone would even think about doing that,

I had another friend who was overheard at a party saying 'what do you take in your vodka x,, coke or lemonade' x was fourteen
Because I pulled her up on it she slowly but surely isolated me from a big friendship group

I couldn't be friends with purdiepie for a multitude of reasons. This is a good thing for all concerned.

Indeed, Prettyinblue. Though I don't think she's on MN to make friends, really.

Purdie said Haveigotviews, YABU. You have got to be lying when you say you have friends. Are they prize cunts, too?

The irony of this made me !

Crabby, your obsession with me is startling. I'm flattered.