DH and I are invited to a dinner party tomorrow evening. The hostess is somebody we've known for a long time, although we don't see as much of her as we used to, and her new-ish partner.
Until today, we thought that it would be six for dinner: our friends, us and another couple DH and I know well and like.
We discovered today that another couple are invited. The female half is horrendous. Around five years ago, I got to know her slightly through a community activity (I won't say what it was for fear of outing myself). She'd taken umbrage at something I'd said to somebody else (which wasn't horrible: I'd asked the other person to do something they'd previously agreed to do, but hadn't done) and sent me a really spiteful e-mail full of insults and saying that she'd only asked me to be involved in the activity because she "felt sorry for me" and "thought I didn't have many friends".
I showed the e-mail to a couple of close friends and they couldn't believe the venom. (FYI I have lots of friends and I am very popular, but I don't think that logic or truth matter much to this person.)
I was really shocked and upset by it, so I've avoided this person ever since. As any sensible woman would. This person later had an affair with her then best friend's husband, so, you know, nice woman.
I don't think that I can sit at a table with this woman. I loathe her too much and her presence will spoil the evening. However, I think it would be rude to cancel on our hosts at such short notice.
What would you do? Also, any tips for coping strategies?
AIBU?
Hellish upcoming dinner party: WWYD?
Nettletheelf · 05/06/2015 12:05
I love this thread!
Then walk off and spit in her starter. 
That would be quite tempting!
Oh my. You are going to have one hell of a night OP. I really love the idea of pretending you have forgotten who she is
Honestly, smiling, being polite and enjoying yourself will have her tripping herself up at all corners.
Also, if she does bite in your direction I think you should belt out the classic MN line of "Did you mean to be so rude?". That will finish her off just nicely 
Oh I'm so glad you are going.
Could you 'accidently' trip her over, then rush to her aid with over the top "oh you are sooo clumsy, I hope you aren't hurt" whilst smiling sweetly at her?
Or 'accidently' spill food/red wine on her, whilst sending her many apologies over your clumsiness.
I'd never actually do these myself but I'd support you if you do.
Or put your coat on with a huge flourish, accidently punching her in the face.
What time is dinner OP? Need to make sure I'm settled with 
and 
for kick-off
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
I'm thinking of cancelling my night out tomorrow, just so I can get all the live updates here have this 
tonight and stay sober tomorrow
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.