DM being U

[Fairy13]

DM exhausts me with her constant neediness.
Today she asked me no less than 10 times not to jump off the arm of the sofa. When I fell off and bumped my head, she had the audacity to tell me that i was the one being U!

She then utterly refused to remove the t shirt from my baby. She claims it was sewn on and impossible to remove but really? I'm convinced if she just applied herself better she would manage it.

Lists of other unreasonable actions include not letting me Hoover my own face, not letting me draw on the walls with liquid eyeliner I stole, and not letting me eat the earth in the garden.

The final straw came when she wanted a wee without me sat on her lap. I'm afraid this was the end for me and I flipped my shit.

Is it time to go NC?

SIBU, I suggest you lie in the floor and scream. That'll teach her.

I had great enjoyment telling mummy "everyone is looking at you and think your a bad mummy" when she wouldn't make it time for daddy to leave work so I shouted and cried.

She then said she didn't care.

Shall we go NC together?

From the oldest Gruffalo (3.5)

Great work gruffalo.

My mummy is a sensitive soul. She was very embarrassed when I shouted 'mummy did wee wee' to the whole cafe at the farm the other day.

Human, I am very skilled at throwing myself on the floor and screaming. I did this just the other day in the co op. My mummy is a very stubborn creature. She threatened to leave me there!

What about when you need something NOW?

Low contact would be a more sensible option.

Your mummy is EVIL. You need to LTB.

The problem is that you're not making ENOUGH fuss and noise. Roll on the floor more. Bang your arms. Scream LOUDER.

But before you go (although, you have every right to move on and find a better one)... Are there any examples of her being better? Has she ever fed you? Changed your nappy? Kissed you goodnight?

There are some evilfuckingmummiies out there... and I wouldn't want you to go to a worse one!

i think you need to phone ss and tell them how mean she is not letting you slide down the stair bannisters, eating choccy until you're fhick and smearing dinner up the walls. she's very bad mummy !

I clearly explained to my mummy that I was shouting at her because
"she is not a nice mummy" but she never changes.

She just never listens to a word I say!

My mummy wouldn't let me touch everything in the supermarket and she pulled my arm. She said that there was someone coming the other way with a trolley and I hadn't seen so would have got squashed so I cried as I think I'd rather be squashed as it sounds fun.
She keeps putting sauce on my pasta and I hate sauce I said it was dirty pasta and I didn't want it I wanted clean pasta. She put butter on my toast and I cried as I said I wanted jam not butter and she said both and I said no, not both just jam and then she wouldn't let me play with the cushions on the sofa which I think look better with a bit of jam on them!
My mummy is really mean.

My mummy wouldn't let me touch everything in the supermarket and she pulled my arm. She said that there was someone coming the other way with a trolley and I hadn't seen so would have got squashed so I cried as I think I'd rather be squashed as it sounds fun.
She keeps putting sauce on my pasta and I hate sauce I said it was dirty pasta and I didn't want it I wanted clean pasta. She put butter on my toast and I cried as I said I wanted jam not butter and she said both and I said no, not both just jam and then she wouldn't let me play with the cushions on the sofa which I think look better with a bit of jam on them!
My mummy is really mean.

My mummy wouldn't let me touch everything in the supermarket and she pulled my arm. She said that there was someone coming the other way with a trolley and I hadn't seen so would have got squashed so I cried as I think I'd rather be squashed as it sounds fun.
She keeps putting sauce on my pasta and I hate sauce I said it was dirty pasta and I didn't want it I wanted clean pasta. She put butter on my toast and I cried as I said I wanted jam not butter and she said both and I said no, not both just jam and then she wouldn't let me play with the cushions on the sofa which I think look better with a bit of jam on them!
My mummy is really mean.

My mummy isn't as stupid as her tablet computer is though. Bloody thing, will go toddler on it now!

My mummy isn't as stupid as her tablet computer is though. Bloody thing, will go toddler on it now!

Apologies. Bloody tablet.

Apologies. Bloody tablet.

Apologies. Bloody tablet.

Having a problem with your tablet, RackofPeas?

rack I think your mummy needs to invest in a new tablet.

fatmomma
I cannot think of a single example at the moment of when my mummy is nice. Sure, to the naked eye she's being entirely reasonable and kind, but you don't knownher like I do.
Just this morning she tried to change my pooey nappy! Clearly she needs more practice as when I got up and walked away mid change there was shit everywhere.

Then the stupid woman brought my milk in the wrong cup. I clearly stated I wanted the blue one. The one she used was quite clearly not blue enough. But would she listen? Would she fuck.

I think she needs to get up earlier, maybe she'd be more productive. I had to wake Her up at 5.20 this morning, the lazy woman was still asleep!

Oh I hear you. My ridiculous mother has this idea that I should walk in front of moving traffic. Even more ridiculous is the idea that I shouldn't push my baby sister's pram in front of moving traffic. What harm's a minor road accident going to do?

Shouldn't. I SHOULDN'T walk in front of moving traffic.

I feel your pain. I've been rehearsing for BGT - and all she does is try to scupper my chances. I mean seriously - what is wrong with practising parkour in the lounge.

My mummy got me another new hoover toy for my birthday. You'd think she'd be happy I liked it and used it for several hours running but she refused to change the batteries when they ran out...until the next day! She said she can't afford to replace four 'C' batteries (whatever that means) several times a day but I know the batteries just materialise in the box on top of the freezer so that's a load of shit.

Of course, I screamed and screamed to show her jut how U she was being.

And I know she never even liked the stupid vase that fell off the window sill with no help from me

My "D"M refused to change the DVD for the umpteenth time yesterday after I'd watched the one that was in for about 5 whole seconds. I hit her over the head with a DVD and she had the nerve to put me on the naughty spot.

She also insists on changing poopy nappies insisting I'll get a sore bum otherwise. (I know she just likes to see me suffer.) And she refuses to let me eat Weetabix, chocolate biscuits and crispies for every meal.

I'm interviewing for a new mummy today...

My mummy is the worst. She wouldn't make it time to pick my bog brother up from school. I should be able to pick him up when I want not just the end of the day.

Then she wouldn't let me buy all the chocolate that I could reach. Silly woman it's obviously put down low so that I can reach it and have it.

Finally I threw the biggest tantrum ever because she wouldn't let me play with scissors. They look like so much fun but mummy said they're dangerous and not for toddlers. She clearly knows nothing and is just making it up to spoil my fun.

Your right crazy, after all did they not watch the ninja girl on BGT - I know she was quite old (10?) - but she had really cool knives and everything. Mine is just a spoilsport.