To be angry at suddenly becoming old?

[jimijack]

Well tbf it feels like it has suddenly happened.

I used to be gorgeous (I did!!) Gorgeous long blonde hair, 8 stone, trendy, could eat anything, always out here & there. Job I loved, people around me equally you'd & gorgeous.

Now.
I am almost 45. I'm fat, frumpy, short very greying hair, I have a moustache, bushy eyebrows, can't remember when I shaved my legs last. I don't recognize this person in the mirror.
I look forward to the Aldi magazine, my wheelie bin gets out more than I do & I've had to change jobs. Much less enjoyable, challenging and mundane.

How did this happen?
I LOVE my life, I am very fortunate, I just hate me & what has happened to me.

Time has gone nowhere, really fast.

No one warned me how exquisite my orgasms would become in my 40s and 50s!!!

Ahh, yes Like..totally get that. When I am out wearing my huge sunnies..I tend to get noticed..long blonde hair and big boobs..Such a difference compared to my face bared to the world :( I hate that it makes such a difference to ME!

I'm a feminist but I really miss male attention. Just doesn't happen anymore.

Well I'm 50 very soon.
Yeah of course I look older than I did when I was 20 30 etc.
However that doesn't mean I look a shambles.
I don't aim to look 'young' just good.

I have Babylage done, my hair is long but I keep it styled every 5 weeks. i have Lvlashes HD brows, good make up and just as important I have a make up lesson every 6 months by a make up artist to keep up with trends, the seasons and what looks my face can take. I have a pedicure and manicure every fortnight. I have threading done when necessary to keep those pesky hairs away
I make sure I have my health and dental checks done regularly.

Although I obviously don't look as good as I naturally did at 20 with a little effort I don't look too bad.

I agree I am 50 in a few months and I look older that doesn't bother me but I don't look bad! All the women in my family are still the same shape so I hope I don't get much different They are a bit thicker around the middle but mostly the same. I was skinny with big boobs now I'm not skinny!

I have to admit, my fifties have been a bit of a shock. I was feeling quite smug about it all until then but post 50, the signs of ageing accelerated and started hitting me from all sides. I'm now bracing myself for my sixties

But as others have said, I'll also consider myself very lucky to have made it that far - none of my grandparents did.

Oh thank you very much Hanging in there Am going to have a chop at my hair tonight :)

I raise you on looking like your mothers: I look like my blimming dad with makeup????

I'm 34 and have noticed wrinkles coming this year. Not too bothered, I've never been one of the pretty girls, always been hairy, plain and plump! Alway got by on my wits/personality so ageing doesn't bother me really.

I don't understand this invisible age thing, I notice everyone equally and probably chat more to older people!

Yes I don't agree with the invisible thing at all

A woman becomes 'sexually' invisable to the vast majority of men once she reaches a certain age, usually around mid to late 40's.
They just don't take any notice of you anymore - now that might be a bessing to some women but I miss that attention. I suppose it's the same for us though, I'm 47 but I'm more likely to notice a good looking man in his 30's than I am a man in his 50's. It's just nature. Of course we still talk to people, but it's all very safe & boring now

Not read the full thread yet but will later.
I do recognise how you feel, 51 is rapidly approaching, maybe I should decide what I am going to do when I grow up..

I've been invisible to men for several years, maybe longer. They just look straight through me even though I think I still scrub-up reasonably well. I don't think it's just about sexual attractiveness either because teenage girls do exactly the same thing. It's a very strainge feeling!

I'm 48 in a couple of weeks and I can't believe it as I'm sure I was in my 30s like, yesterday! The good thing is at least all your friends are ageing at the same rate! But maybe give yourself a pamper hour once a week where the time is just for you to devote to making yourself feel good xx

And I agree with LikeICan - I find myself ogling men in their 30s then having to slap myself as I know I need to start looking at older men! I must be a cougar, I suppose! Xx

I have always preferred slightly older men. Even now in my 50s.
Mark Harmon from NCIS for instance.
Young men don't do it for me.

It doesn't bother me that I am invisible sexually, I quite like it that way. I still walk past some men and have that piercing connection of the eyes, that's enough for me.

I am glad I live in a place with a big social scene full of people in their 50s and 60s all it seems still interesting and interested I wasn't really talking about becoming invisible sexually to men younger! I mean I am just as likely to notice the hair/dress/smile of someone of any age. I have a few single friends 45 -55 range and when I go out with them they seem to have no shortage of admirers and are always going on dates I can't keep up with their antics at times!

45 is still young! I am 41 size 10 dye my hair bright red and am a goth. I will never change myself to please others. I am very lucky that everyone i dont know eg when i first started this job thought i was a max of 35. OP you can change all of the tings that bother you. We all have to age and its about oleasing you not others and doing what feels right for you!

I think I need to join you on a night out, noddyholder! I suppose a good policy would be to look for a man a good few years older then you will always be the younger woman! (I got dumped by my 50-year -old husband after 27 years for a 32-year-old. I'm 48 I a week or so and that was painful!). Xx

Think I'll come & live where you are noddyholder