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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask you about the subject (object?) of your most memorable bonkers sex dream?

188 replies

EscapePea · 01/05/2015 21:17

I hasten to add that I'm not looking for gory details, just weird people cropping up! Mine is Angus Deayton. We had a years-long and happy affair in a dream lasting perhaps ten minutes. I still do a double-take when I see him on TV.

OP posts:
FishCanFly · 05/05/2015 15:54

I had a strap-on and screwed one girl i went to school with. I'M NOT GAY in anyways...

ToastMakesMeHappy · 05/05/2015 15:55

Phil Mitchell from eastenders Blush and no I do not fancy him in real life! I blame the pregnancy hormones for that one

FishCanFly · 05/05/2015 15:57

Oh, and when i binge-watched Sons of Anarchy boxsets, it was Clay/Ron Perlman who used to visit me at nights Blush

blushingbooty · 05/05/2015 15:59

In the middle of a threesome, turned into a man shagging 2 other guys. Pretty sure I was pregnant a little bit later in the dream.

ScotsWhaHae · 05/05/2015 16:09

My father in law.

That was awkward.

Harrietsferrets · 05/05/2015 18:01

Vladimir Putin - very flexible, very inventive, exceptional stamina and what he could do with his hands was very very very ........... interesting

lunalelle · 05/05/2015 19:14

I feel much better now there are three votes for Vladimir...

AmberNectarine · 05/05/2015 19:18

I had a sex dream about Bob Monkhouse once when I was a teenager. He was crying so I had sec with him to make him feel better, in the sixth form common room, as you do.

I made the mistake of revealing this to my teenage mates. Still gets mentioned occasionally, 15y later...

Flyinggeese21 · 05/05/2015 19:41

Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall! It was completely x rated and I'd never thought about him that way before...

DilapidatedGlamourpuss · 05/05/2015 23:54

My dissertation supervisor, who was a little guy of about 70 who was obsessed with Arsenal. I did an MA in English, so if the dream involved us narrating our own sexy happenings, with the help of a Kindle and then acting them out. We kept having to stop to turn the page on the Kindle to know what bit to do next Confused

I stupidly told my DP, who told all our uni friends who are still laughing about it 5 years later... My supervisory meetings were so cringe after that Blush

fishandlilacs · 06/05/2015 11:42

When pregnant, David Walliams. When I thought he was gay too.

helenahandbag · 06/05/2015 13:04

I'm weeping at the Bob Monkhouse pity sex Grin

motherofmonster · 06/05/2015 13:53

oh dear... im almost afraid to say.

A highly charged sex dream with the mad professor guy from back to the future where i was tied to a table and experimented on Blush

netty7070 · 06/05/2015 13:56

I am actually honking with laughter at this thread. Toast! Harissa! Grin

DowntownFunk · 06/05/2015 20:11

Did he spunk in your hair flyinggeese?

No need to dignify that one with an answer Grin

TiggyCharlotteElizabethDianaD · 06/05/2015 20:19

I posted a thread about one I had. After the lady had led me through the house to the bathroom to show me her rising bread dough, she took me into the bedroom. She proceeded to give me a special treat! She started to attach straps to her feet that held small rubbery finger-like spurs, about 2 inches long, on the back of her heels. The dream sort of stopped before anything happened.

I think I need help.

TiggyCharlotteElizabethDianaD · 06/05/2015 21:14

Thread killer isn't it?!

MrsToddsShortcut · 06/05/2015 21:34

I had a dream the other night about Peter Capaldi who I have never ever before considered in any romantic fashion at all!

He was a very considerate, loving, romantic partner and I woke up feeling all weird and thought about him all day before the strange post-dream haze wore off.

Rather hideously, I also once dreamt that I was having an extremely torrid and passionate affair with David Cameron ShockConfusedBlush!
We were in my school and he was married to Ffion Hague. We kept exchanging lust filled glances before sneaking off to have sex

God knows where that came from. In real life I'd rather vacuum out my own eyeballs and use them to make soup than have sex with him...

beanlovesb · 06/05/2015 22:21

when I was much younger I dreamt I was Christina Aguilera having sex with Damon Albarn. I had a massive girl crush on Christina at the time and was obsessed with Damon Albarn so it was a pretty amazing dream! also when I was teenager, J from 5 Blush

Flyinggeese21 · 06/05/2015 22:50

Downtownfunk, no but he did lots of other things... in a greenhouse!

(Hair reference because of his curls? Or am I being dim?).

BazilGin · 06/05/2015 22:54

Liam Gallagher. It all started with him being terribly upset about something and he was just sitting in this black chair, crying.
I spare you the details, but needless to say, I cheered him right up!
We ended up having steamy, but very tender and loving sex in said chair. I woke up with an orgasm. Best sex dream ever that was! Unfortunately, that was about 12 years ago. He never visited my dreams since.
Sorry for TMI.

DowntownFunk · 06/05/2015 22:56

According to Mumsnet folklore ejaculating in his sleeping (sleeping as in fast asleep) partner's hair is his kink.

Theoldcauliflower · 06/05/2015 23:18

Pavorotti and yes he had his tenner outfit on!!! He was bright red, huffing and puffing to! Blush

Quietattheback · 06/05/2015 23:21

Jeremy Kyle! Ack! Ack! Ack... although he was an extremely good kisser.

lunalelle · 06/05/2015 23:25

Shortcut - I am trying to picture what a 'lust filled glance' from Cameron might be like Shock

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