AIBU to complain about these mothers?!

[Lindsay81]

AIBU to complain at the gym reception about mothers that bring their >6 year old sons into ladies changing rooms, despite there being signs to say this is not acceptable over this age AND family changing rooms being available?

After my workout I shower and change. I don't linger over this or choose to dry my hair completely in the buff (LOL) but nor do I want to cart all my stuff into one of those cubicles. I dry myself and get dressed. This is quite difficult to do with a 10year old boy's eyes nearly popping out his head due to him staring at you. I feel I should in some way keep my towel pinned to my sides with my elbows, while simultaneously attempting to pull my underwear on, resembling some sort of demented T-Rex.

Are you a mother that does this? If so, 1) Know that I detest you and 2) WHY?! Go into the family changing rooms!

AIBU to complain, especially about the ones that do it weekly?

At our pool the signs say children aged 8 and over should be in the appropriate changing room. As my ds is and was small for his age I took him into the ladies for a while longer but sent him into a cubicle to get changed. It was all kids at that time of day anyway as it was lessons, no adults swimming in any event.

To me, and I know you'll not have meant it that way, but that last sentence just dismisses all the girls that would be using the facilities, and their right to privacy, you don't know what age the girls are or how they feel before you walk in the room, and if your ds is 8/9 then it's possible that there are girls of that age already changing, it's not an uncommon age for puberty to start.

If it's only children, and there's no naked men, could you have taken him into the males and supervised in a cubicle there? Not being arsey btw, just wondering why it isn't an option.

I agree with you almond- women and girls are only allowed to have things until men want them- then they are expected to give them up.

I think this thread has moved from the original scenario though.

Op was talking about a specific club, implying membership, with well signposted rules about over 8yo changing.

I read that as a rule the mums involved had signed up to on joining.

She also said there WAS available family changing separately. So this is a different scenario to all the exceptions pps have added here. If the facilities ARE AVAILABLE then of course YANBU to expect them to be used. This is regardless of visible or invisible disability, membership fee, parental paranoias, facilities being available or not in other places... If the facilities are present, ffs use them.

If it's only children, and there's no naked men, could you have taken him into the males and supervised in a cubicle there? Not being arsey btw, just wondering why it isn't an option.

Interesting point. I did this the first time my DS went to swimming lessons when he was 'too old' for the female changing area. I don't now.

BUT, if a Single Dad was taking his 8yo girl swimming and for the first time she had to use the female changing area, would it be OK for him to accompany her? No. it would not.

Again, no adults changing in either situation, only children.

Girls should be allowed the space to change without boys and vice versa.

I will ask our swimming school if girls over 8 are expected to dress in the female changing area and are in effect not allowed in the male changing rooms if brought by a male parent.

Having read this thread I was in the adult area of the changing room of my gym today, there are two cubicles in the adult area and one in the family area. I usually just change by the benches in the adult area as do most people who use the gym. One of the cubicles was in use and I was the only other person in there. I'd just had a shower when a woman came in with her son who looked about 8. She left him in the family area but came into the adults area to change using one of the cubicles so both were in use. She kept calling him in, he came in 4 times while I was trying to dress. I'm not prudish in any way. She finished getting changed then said to her son that she needed to send a work email then they would go in the pool. They both sat on the bench I was changing at. I decided I'd had enough and asked her if she could take it elsewhere saying that she was in the adult area. She huffed and from her body language made it very clear she was pissed off coming back a few minutes later to put her phone away. I said thank you too her and she just sniffed at me again, so I said, look this is the adult changing area, you were using a cubicle so your son couldn't see you but maybe I didn't want him to see me either. She finally looked at me saying 'I wasn't using the cubicle so my son couldn't see me'. I feel really uncomfortable about the whole thing. Her son was gawping not in a dirty way more in a curious way but I was just trying to get dressed after a shower before work and she was all harrumph at me for asking her after several chances to go away.