AIBU to be uncomfortable with friends getting naked on holiday??

[Notlookingforwardtothis]

We're due to go to Spain in June with another family to a shared villa with a pool. Both families have 2 dd, roughly aged 12 and 14. The other day my friend mentioned that she and her husband like to sunbathe and swim naked when on holiday. I'm sure my horrified face gave away my reaction to that comment! AIBU to ask that they wear swimsuits around the pool area?

Oh come on Only, we're British! We don't do mass nudity. It's not uptight to find the friend a bit peculiar for wanting to do this - it's actually a bit odd to suddenly spring it on another family that you're sharing a villa with. And bloody rude.

And ftr we're naked a lot of the time at home. But I wouldn't answer the door without putting some clothes on, nor would I expect my guests to want to be around our nudity.

It's hardly mass nudity, is it, one couple?

What is this 'we're British, we don't do nudity' rubbish, anyway? What, none of us? I've 'done' nudity before and I could have sworn I was a Brit. I'd better check my passport ...

It's perfectly OK to sunbathe naked en famille. It's a bit blinking odd to book a holiday with friends before ascertaining if they're OK with it. I think your friends are being unreasonable if they insist on it.

Only maybe you could go to the villa instead of the OP?

Well we don't really. It's generally considered to be rather niche :o

i shower in the dark and look at the ceiling whilst i do body issues a go-go

my children would be repulsed at seeing my friends naked and i wouldn't want to see my friends husbands dangly bits swaying around getting a suntan. yuck.

Sounds like she might prefer that!

But actually, although I have no problem with my own or anyone else's nudity, on balance I'd probably rather holiday with my partner and friends than someone else's, regardless of who if anyone swims naked at any point.

we are very happy with nudity (my little one sleeps naked most of the time and I often have no top on in bed)

This is hilarious, btw. No top on in bed?! How brazenly continental!

odd, I don't want to be gratuitously argumentative but honestly, I don't think nudity is considered that niche.

kenny, you say it yourself; you have issues. You're probably not that representative.

it's fine that they want to be naked on holiday, but should mentioned BEFORE you booked your holiday, then you could make an informed choice.

I hope you have fun anyway!

Call me old fashioned but I would be uncomfortable for a middle aged man to be striding around the pool, with his meat and 2 veg swinging in the breeze in front of my teenage daughter.

It is highly inappropriate. And frankly just unnecessary. I would also suspect a rather unsavoury hidden agenda. They will probably get a frisson of excitement at parading naked in front you all.

Rather unpleasant and shouldn't be encouraged.

how does one dive into a pool topless? aren't there boobs everywhere and doesn't it hurt?
sorry just often wondered and this seems a good thread for the question :o

No stealth it doesn't hurt at all. It's actually much more comfortable than being bound up in bits of cloth and plastic.

I'm a naturist and have enjoyed hols in several naturist spas in Germany and Scandinavia.
However, I would definitely ask friends BEFORE we book a holiday, if they were ok with nudity.
Maybe your friends misread your attitudes and thought you wouldn't be bothered. However, they should have specifically asked.

Oh god. I hope they're at least in good shape and ahem, keep their personal grooming up. I don't care about people going naked but if I have to have them in my line of vision they should at least not be unpleasant to look at. I say this after a long ago holiday in Germany where I saw far too many naked people who had clearly spent the last twenty years drinking kolsch and stuffing down bratwursts... Nothing worse than fat, sunburned arses... amongst other awful sights.

Surely what your friend means is that her husband swims naked when they're alone?

I would definitely cancel. If they can't agree to put some clothes on when they know not doing so will make you uncomfortable, what else will you disagree on? Reasonable time to go to bed? Who buys food? Ground rules for children? Sounds like a nightmare holiday.

Only lovers- do not need to get a grip. It's just not acceptable at all in our culture for adults outside the family to be naked around children. It is creepy and that's my opinion that I'm giving to the OP!

"I don't want to be gratuitously argumentative but honestly, I don't think nudity is considered that niche."

Only nudity, per se, certainly isn't niche. It happens all the time in the privacy of one's own home. I do not have a problem at all in my children still occasionally seeing me naked. Never have done.

But nudity 'in front of people who are not immediate family' YES that is very bloody niche, frankly.

And nudity from unrelated middle aged men in front of teenage girls and young children, moves way beyond mere 'niche' into something rather arrogant and exhibitionist at best, and deeply unsavoury at worst.

I don't care what they do in Germany. Communal nudity has never been an accepted part of contemporary main stream British culture.

I'm not someone who is personally comfortable with being naked in public, but it would never occur to me that there was anything 'unsavoury' or exhibitionist about friends being naked on a shared holiday, with or without children. Or that they should check with me first.

YANBU
It is not the norm in the UK
It is not the norm in Spain
It is not the norm to not discuss this upfront before booking

And regarding teens and nakedness - it is totally the norm for them to be self conscious and embarrassed - it's a biological chemical part of development

Who wants to go on holidays and be confronted with some middle aged bits and pieces??!?

No thanks

are they scandinavian/german? if so, totally normal to go around naked in the sun. whole families do it. relax.... it's just bodies...

erm

It is perfectly normal in some parts of Scandinavia to let toddler play naked on the beach. As for adults going around naked in the sun???? Not so sure about that.

Topless fine, but stark naked? no.....

Yuk. Absoloutely not something I would be comfortable with. I would definitely suspect some hidden agenda. I cannot believe they think this is acceptable in front
Of teenage girls. Hiw old are their children op?
Any teens know would be horrified at this, and if it was my own DD she would simply refuse to go!

Its totally normal for teens to be embarrassed, ashamed and self-concious?

Only in our distorted corner of the world....and then only recently.

The vast majority of UK teenage girls have body image issues. A majority of them have already tried dieting. In Sweden, girls with body image issues are in the minority and the number who have tried dieting is half that in the UK.

I am obviously not saying this difference is all down to us having a much less healthy attitude to nudity and bodies in general than our counterparts in Sweden, but I am sure it is a part of the picture.

It's just not acceptable at all in our culture for adults outside the family to be naked around children. It is creepy and that's my opinion that I'm giving to the OP!

You simply do not have the only or final say on what's 'acceptable' in our culture. There are people who would disagree with you and neither is absolutely stone-cold right or wrong. It's a matter of opinion, not one person laying down a specious law.

creepy?

arrogant and exhibitionist at best, and deeply unsavoury at worst.?

hidden agenda?

These are the OP's friends, FFS. Even she didn't go so far as to use words like that. How dare you all? Just because it's not your cup of tea?