Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed with fussy eaters?

210 replies

FromRussiaWithLove · 05/04/2015 09:39

Am I being unreasonable to be annoyed with people who are fussy about their food? As in eating things separately, this can't touch that, not eating mushy/solid/green or whatever? Gets me so frustrated. Just bloody eat it! So many people out there would give everything for a fraction of it and yet you're here being awkward! Just needed to get this one out...

OP posts:
limitedperiodonly · 05/04/2015 13:24

Today I am cooking gammon in honey and ginger. Salmon Wellington. Sausage meat. Mashed swede and carrot, peas, roast potatoes, stuffing, yorkshire puddings. The only thing that everyone will eat on there is the roast potatoes.

Dawndonnaagain I'd eat all that. I suppose you're dishing up now so it's too late for me to come round Smile

I don't get bent out of shape by fussy eaters though. The mere sight of piccalilli and beetroot makes me queasy.

We used to scrape our school dinners into the pig bin at primary - they don't do that any more, do they?

I was nearly sick when I saw the baked beans mixed up with the custard and I can still remember it.

EmeraldThief · 05/04/2015 13:27

I bet "selective eating" and food phobias and the other lame excuses for fadiness that are being trotted on here don't exist in third world countries where food is scarce. Would you even have these issues of you were actually starving I wonder?

Grow up!

MrsCs · 05/04/2015 13:28

Totally agree Emerald, childish attention seeking, OP YANBU

OnlyLovers · 05/04/2015 13:30

No, YANBU. It's tedious and babyish. And if someone's cooking for you, it's ungrateful and downright rude.

ProfessorPickles · 05/04/2015 13:31

Emerald - what an ignorant person you are. These eating disorders are often linked with autism, I suppose they're just putting it on to be awkward then yeah?
I think you are the one that needs to grow up. M&s

ProfessorPickles · 05/04/2015 13:35

I have had my eating disorder my whole life meaning I have only ever had the same three meals every day.
I am NOT happy about it and I never attention seek.
It isn't babyish, it is a genuine eating disorder.
I do not cause a fuss, I don't expect anyone to provide special meals for me.
It's other people that make it an issue, I have been laughed at and ridiculed for not being able to eat chinese food at a restaurant even though I never said a word about it myself. I was asked to try something, I politely declined and they kept hounding me to try it over and over despite me saying no.
Many people do it and it's extremely frustrating

ToadsJustFellFromTheSky · 05/04/2015 13:36

EmeraldThief so you think autism, sensory processing disorders and eating disorders are all "lame excuses" are they? Hmm

Quite frankly, if anyone on this thread needs to grow the fuck up, it's you.

Your post is quite frankly borderline disabilist.

ToadsJustFellFromTheSky · 05/04/2015 13:39

X post with ProfessorPickles. Well said.

Alisvolatpropiis · 05/04/2015 13:42

Emerald

Third world countries have mental health issues which first world countries do not. Does that make them less or more real to you?

ToadsJustFellFromTheSky · 05/04/2015 13:44

I have no clue why I'm even replying to this thread. It's obvious that the OP only stared this thread to be inflammatory. This thread is their first post and they've disappeared from the thread.

So everyone agreeing with the OP, you're agreeing with a goady fucker. Well done.

Micah · 05/04/2015 13:48

Does this extend to vegetarianism or ethical eating?

I am "fussy", in that I prefer free range/organic meat/milk/ eggs etc. Most of the time eating out I will eat vegetarian.

However I don't make a fuss. I will just politely refuse the meat and eat vegetables, if there's no vegetarian option- ie at others houses.

I appreciate its a luxury being able to choose, but I do have the ability to choose, so I choose animal welfare.

TelephoneEggGnawingMachine · 05/04/2015 13:51

Do you think weve scared the OP off, or perhaps this was a "light touchpaper & retire" situation. Because that's what it looks like.

limitedperiodonly · 05/04/2015 13:53

I have some sympathy with EmeraldThief with her dad. Fussy eaters can end up controlling your life - whether they mean to or not.

DH went through a stage of 'healthy eating' - it wasn't particularly healthy, it was just what he decided after talking to his bonkers personal trainer and reading claptrap like Mens' Health.

Basically it was slabs of grilled protein with salad or grilled vegetables. I humoured this for quite a while but then decided after too many days asking him what he wanted me to buy, only to get the vague answer 'something light' to answer: 'Okay, so shall I get you a fucking Aero?' and knock it on the head.

It was boring for me and I think he was moving towards an eating disorder and very controlling behaviour. We had a really restricted diet. So I just bought what I wanted and cooked it how I liked it.

That said, he doesn't have sensory issues or any other difficulties. He was in the grip of a fad and he is single-minded when in that mood.

I understand that people do have sensory issues and some others simply don't like things - even the thought of them without trying - and that's okay.

OnlyLovers · 05/04/2015 13:55

So everyone agreeing with the OP, you're agreeing with a goady fucker. Well done.

It wasn't the OP who said food phobias etc were just attention-seeking and may be made up; I didn't find her post particularly goady. And, barring actual health issues, I am happy to agree with the OP that fussy eaters are irritating.

thornrose · 05/04/2015 13:58

Goady fucker alert. Don't let them get to you.

Foxyloxyatehennypenny · 05/04/2015 14:05

I bet "selective eating" and food phobias and the other lame excuses for fadiness that are being trotted on here don't exist in third world countries where food is scarce. Would you even have these issues of you were actually starving I wonder?.

Shock To answer your question yes, I would. However, perhaps that's something to do with being made to eat my own vomit because I couldn't finish a plate of food. I often threw up because I was so full. I had to eat it all until that plate was clear of food vomited on or not. So yes, in my case I would still have "issues", be a "selective eater" and have a "lame excuse" for being "faddy".

Fifis25StottieCakes · 05/04/2015 14:07

When i was a kid i would only eat mash, rosties meat and yorkies on a roast dinner. Went of for years until i was pregnant with my first and went out for a carvery lunch. Maybe it was guilt but i put all the veg on my plate and ate the lot. I love veg now but tomatoes and cucumber i cant bear the site or smell of them, cant eat anything with them in or even if they are in something i cant pick them out and eat the rest of it.

limitedperiodonly · 05/04/2015 14:07

I don't think it matters what the OP's intentions were.

Fussy eating is a favourite MN topic. Just because we all say the same things every time it comes up doesn't stop us saying it and taking the thread whichever way we want.

I'm here because I've just put the medium-hottish lamb curry in for dinner. My fussy DH will eat that, though he'd prefer it to be made with fish. But the shoulder of lamb was reduced and stashed in the freezer and fish is extortionate at Easter, so 'tough titty Fishface'*, as I said to him earlier.

  • It's a Life of Brian reference, which is my favourite Easter film.
Dawndonnaagain · 05/04/2015 14:10

bet "selective eating" and food phobias and the other lame excuses for fadiness that are being trotted on here don't exist in third world countries where food is scarce. Would you even have these issues of you were actually starving I wonder?

Actually they do, and do you know what, children do starve. There have even been one or two cases where autistic children in tribes have starved to death. So, before telling those of us that actually know something about these issues, may I suggest you do the research.

ToadsJustFellFromTheSky · 05/04/2015 14:15

It wasn't the OP who said food phobias etc were just attention-seeking and may be made up;

I never said it was Confused.

I didn't find her post particularly goady.

Maybe she isn't goady. Like I said though, she's either a newbie or a name changer and has also flounced from the thread. Might be innocent but I find that suspicious.

Then again, maybe we've just scared them off.

And, barring actual health issues, I am happy to agree with the OP that fussy eaters are irritating.

But why are they irritating? How does it effect you? I can understand if someone was going around making gagging sounds every time you ate something they didn't like or made a big song and dance about their food (but really that's just rude behaviour and being selfish rather than being fussy).

But if someone just quietly gets on with it then why does it irritate you? I linked to another thread earlier on where the OP is a fussy eater but wouldn't dream of telling people what they can and can't eat or make a song a dance about what she doesn't eat. She also wouldn't dream of dictating where people can eat and she would always go eat out with people and find something she did like on the menu and just enjoy the company. If she couldn't find anything she liked she just wouldn't go. Why is someone like the OP of that thread annoying to you? It doesn't effect you.

Also, you don't know why someone is a fussy eater. They may well have health issues but just haven't told you about them. How do you know whether someone has health issues or is just being "irritating"? You never know what people's issues are or what might have happened in their life. A bit of sympathy rather than judgment might be nice.

OnlyLovers · 05/04/2015 14:20

Toads, what I meant was 'It wasn't the OP who said food phobias etc were just attention-seeking and may be made up; I agree that those posts ARE goady, but I don't think hers is'.

It affects me when people make gagging sounds and/or a big song and dance about their food, or complain about what I've cooked. These things have happened to me plenty of times.

And people who quietly eat what they want and don't make a fuss about it, no, they don't annoy me personally.

But I do find the wider concept of fussy eating irritating, yes, which was the original question, and I don't feel I need to apologise for that. How many threads are there on here about things that annoy people just because they do?

SauvignonBlanche · 05/04/2015 14:24

bet "selective eating" and food phobias and the other lame excuses for fadiness that are being trotted on here don't exist in third world countries where food is scarce. Would you even have these issues of you were actually starving I wonder?

I know several children with autism who have to be tube fed as they will not eat despite being perfectly capable of doing so and would otherwise starve to death so the above remark is ignorant shite.

ToadsJustFellFromTheSky · 05/04/2015 14:24

OK, so it's not fussy eaters that annoy you, it's rude and selfish behaviour that annoys you Hmm.

DrCoconut · 05/04/2015 14:25

DS1 is 16 but has huge eating issues due to his autism. DS2 eats normally so it's obviously not due to their upbringing. DS1 is very suspicious of wet foods which rules out sauces, gravy, beans, spaghetti etc. He also fears foods touching and unless they are very familiar safe choices won't eat things which tastes a bit of something else. I ended up putting him on packed lunch because school insisted on putting all his food together and then pouring gravy or beans over it. Or custard on the pudding. They had to give him all the components of the meal to make it balanced apparently and from their point of view them doing this and him eating nothing was better than giving him a chance to eat something. He always left it all when he might have eaten it seperate and plain. So being a pain is one thing, but some people have profound issues with food.

EmeraldThief · 05/04/2015 14:26

Yes, some fussy eaters may be on the Autistic spectrum but a large number are most certainly not and are just stuck in an eternal state of arrested development. My dad isn't autustic amd neither are any of the other fussy eaters I know, they behave that way because they've been indulged all of their lives and allowed to get away with it. My dad was a mummy's boy, who my Nana pandered every whim to and my mum, for her sins, carried that on after she married him.

Nothing goady in the OP at all. It is frustrating eating out with and catering for fussy eaters.