To think servants could show more gratitude

[QueenOfTheAlley]

I went to a lot of trouble catching a mouse for them and took it home still alive so that they could play with it before eating it.

Servant1 picked me up to put me outside so I dropped the mouse at Servant2's feet. It ran behind the cooker and she chased me out of the house yelling.

If that's all the thanks I get I don't know why I bother!

Everyone is out to get me. They try and trick me with their sweet words, delicacies and caresses, but I know it's all a cunning plot. That strange sucking machine wants to eat me, the postman harasses me every day, the bin men are devils and it will take me at least a week to get over the plumber's visit. The other day a female human infringed my territory and brought a strange crawling beast with her, it gurgled and dribbled and who knows what it would have done if I hadn't scarpered. Occasionally I let the lady of the house rub my tummy, and if she's really lucky, I will drool on her. But I'm fairly sure she's in league with the sucking machine.

I've slept rough in Leeds after leaving my first home because of those barky things, so I'm well hard ... but if they bring that horrid noisy thing near me, I have to attack their leg & rake my claws down it to make the point. I don't like resorting to that, but they don't get the message.

The Vax one they had was so awful I was completely traumatised & hid in the wardrobe all night where there was no litter tray, so they changed it for a Miele 'pet-hair' model, with a paw-print on it; it's a lot quieter, but I'm still prepared to maim them if they come near me with it.

oooh.... I quite like ours , you get a nice massage and those nasty little crawly itchy bity things get sucked up also .. Ok call me a purrvert if you must , but I also quite like it when she-slave sucks my tail up in it..

Ours isnt noisy though..