Mean to not have asked him to get off? At the park

[Pyjamaramadrama]

Took ds to the park, it was on the way back from somewhere and getting dark so was only spending 15 minutes there at the most.

The park had completely emptied apart from one little girl. It's a big park, lots to do. Ds headed straight for a single swing, there are other swings but this one is a bit different.

The little girls parents called her to go home all within 60 seconds of us arriving. The little girl started crying that she wanted to go on the swing again before she went and stood by the swing ds was on. She stood there all arms crossed and grumpy faced waiting for him to get off.

For a second I thought I might ask him to let her have a go but thought better of it as she had the whole park to choose from.

Her parents stood there for 2-3 minutes before calling her away.

Ds is the most sharing child you could meet really he's always the one standing at the bottom of the slide letting all the other kids go first, he's always very patiently waiting for toddlers to decide if they want to go down the slide and stopping bigger kids from bashing into them so I thought sod it he's having his turn.

Thanks all.

Worra I see what you're saying although I stand by what I said, ds drives me insane at times but he generally is very considerate to other kids often at his own loss and it's been something that been picked up by teachers etc so not me bring blinkered.

I'm not taking it too seriously, I do like to chat on here though about the little things in life. I'm probably normally a people pleaser and end up feeling a bit resentful.

Sharing = everyone getting their turn, a bit like a queue.

Teaching your child to be a doormat, and that they don't matter just as much as everyone else = telling them to get off the swing the moment someone else says they want a go (obviously in the context here, that they've only just got on it themselves).

I am not sure if you are doing that wilfully, zzzz.

I didn't say sharing affects self esteem. Try reading my posts again.

turns, exactly. that involves actually letting each kid have a go. not immediately handing over having not even had a play

My DD had great self esteem yesterday. I kept getting her off the swing to give other kids a turn and then later told her how kind and nice she was because other wee kids like the swing as much as she does. (I have to lay it on thick). She was beaming and clapping herself.

The wee girl in the OP was about to go home. So probably couldn't wait 5 mins and just wanted a wee shot before the OPS DS had it all to himself. Much twisting of this going on.

I wouldn't have considered it, it's a swing who cares! try not to get involved in kiddy swing dramas!

Great! Another different scenario that proves a different point!

Do wee children have tiny tummies?

Zzzz I think the point about self esteem is that if you're always giving and others are always taking it can cause resentment.

This is only a tiny example but things have happened at school where ds have given things away due to pestering, or as said in op he's stood at the bottom of the slide because all the others were pushing past, he's had a child shoving him because he's waiting for a toddler to get off the bottom, all of which he shrugs off.

But if it keeps happening that those who shout the loudest get their way it does end up getting old.

Nomama the actual scenario, yes.

You are getting somewhat over angry about this minor issue.

Yes heels. It's a kiddie swing drama not a life changing situation where you could either rescue the girl from a life of selfishness by teaching her a lesson or ruin your DS's fragile self esteem by showing him that he always comes second in life.

I'm not angry, fanjo. What gave you that impression?

I am overly interested, waiting for an appointment. But not angry!

Your sarky words maybe?

I get that she was going and didn't have time but I am absolutely certain that she only picked that swing because another child was on it.

I think this because she was quite happy then immediately her parents said home time she started wailing and stomping about having another go on the swing. The fact that he parents then stood there staring expecting ds to get off spoke a thousand words.

If she was my little girl she would have been told to either come now, or pick something else to have a last go on. Don't think it would have mattered what your ds was on that would have been the one she wanted. You were not only NBU but hopefully taught the little girl something too.

Sarky = angry on MN?

I shall remember that, thanks!

The only unreasonable people here are the parents who allowed their 4/5 year old to try to guilt and tantrum another child off a swing they'd just got on, when she'd already had a go.

I agree with you op.

Life's a bitch kids get used to it.

Good. You remember it

Fanjo

OP's kid was going to be there for fifteen minutes. FIFTEEN.

The girl had probably been there for a while.

Why should OP accommodate a little girl just wanting to throw a tantrum?

I don't care whether that child was 3 or 4. At that age, Many kids are already being taught lessons in life. Had I been the parent, I would have taken her away BECAUSE she stood there grumpily rather than wait patiently.

You don't have to oblige because it's a "wee little girl". So what? Are cute little girls any better than OP's son?!?

YANBU. The child had already had a go on the swing, your son had just got on it, and her parents were about to leave anyhow.
They should not have stood there for several minutes trying to make you feel guilty about not pulling your son off the swing after a few seconds, simply because their child had decided to have a whinge.
Most kids whinge and plead for just one more go when you say you're leaving the park. You can't just give in to them all the time, particularly if they're whinging for a go on something that another child has just started using.

Not going to the swings and slides is on my things to be thankful for list every day. Every fucking day for 7 years. I should have a medal.