To be scared of death?

[dragdownthemoon]

I am terrified of what happens after death. I have nightmares about it, I have panic attacks when I think about it. I don't want to be a ghost cursed to wander the earth alone or trapped in a hell dimension, or just all alone in the dark. No one knows what happens when we die and I am terrified of what will happen. I tried to talk to DH about it, he actually laughed at me and says he has no concept of why on earth I could be bothered by this.

Does anyone else get freaked out by the thought of what happens when we die? I am tormented by it and there is no escape, death is coming to us all

who am I to presume to judge what God may or may not do?

How did you decide to be a christian without engaging your judgement? At some point you needed to judge him in order for you to say 'this is the religion for me', and god was quite happy for you to do that and he also knew that you would need your own sense of right and wrong to become a christian, but now that you believe, you appear to think god requires you to turn it off. Do you see how that looks dangerous to someone on the outside. Although I don't think you actually have disabled it, as we see in my previous post where you have used that well formed and sound sense of right and wrong to 'adjust' what the bible says.

but something that should start to naturally occur in more abundance once you become a follower of Jesus because you are hopefully using him as a role model.

How come non-believers are able to be kind and good without a religion? If I start being casually racist I would be following his example? Why is it okay for Jesus to be casually racist but not me?

who am I to presume

Think of it like this, you meet someone and start dating, they seem nice, you see them being kind, they treat you and everyone well, you feel confident to let things develop and you later go on to marry. Later you find out that they drowned a load of babies, you confront them and they say 'who are you to judge me!' you decide that it doesn't matter because you're sure they had a good reason.

What part of that little story is logical? How is it different to if god is the partner?

I am still lurking, reading and absorbing this v interesting thread.

To me faith is something you either have, or you don't. Full stop.
No amount of reasoning will 'give' me faith, just as no amount of arguing against it will convince somebody who does have faith.

I can say how faith can be v comforting (or scary) and am sometimes a bit envious of somebody having this reassurance. Having said that, to me it does seem a bit like a nightlight can be comforting to a child: nothing has really changed, but appears less frightening.

I have no idea where 'we' or the universe came from or whether or not there is a 'soul', but I don't need to. I just AM.
I truly don't know whether that makes me thoroughly enlightened or a bit of a dim windbag

I can make more sense of the rather random amazingness and cruelty of the world but accepting it as random rather than as part of some 'plan'. Unless we are pets to some alien overlords who keep us as pets and treat us a overindulgently or cruelly as some people treat animals…. No God figure required.

just as no amount of arguing against it will convince somebody who does have faith.

I think this sort of discussion probably did sow the seeds of change for me back in the day I was a christian. It happens slowly though and the real thinking is done away from debate. That's not the main reason I enjoy a kickabout here though, it is just interesting and I do like arguing. I often hear believers question why we spend time trying to convince people they're wrong as if we are trying to convince ourselves on some level but I enjoy robust debate about any issue where I feel secure in my reasoning be it anti-vaxers, werewolf believers, sexist thinking and so on.

Interesting to hear your motivations headinhands, and I have a lot of respect for the way you have handled your journey from faith to atheist.
I have lost half of my family to a fervent flavour of christianity- many years ago now, and we do have some strays that have returned to the fold
so religion is something I have to live with every day. That and the disgust of having religion the carte blanche to indoctrinate in every state school.
Learning about religion has only soured my taste.

Are you content with you and everyone and everything around you just being a load of atoms that have randomly clustered together over time and that there is no real point or meaning to this?

suggest- yes I am fine with that. Are you lacking in your life?

Fine. No am not thank you

Do you know much about atoms?

Does anyone else here're watch The Big Questions on BBC1, 10am every Sunday morning. Today one of the things they're discussing is religion in state schools and also asking the question 'does satan live in all of us'? They have a wide variety of people in the audience so debate is never dull!

Yes, I often catch some of that headinhands Today I think they were discussing whether it's always/ever right to engage with terrorists on the bit I caught. Generally is an intelligent level of interesting debate I agree.
Only watched a bit as was then off out to my Quaker Meeting - which is liberal and diverse enough to be my kind of faith community. As I said before I think I can still appreciate some of the things that faith and faith communities can offer through life, but have personally increasingly rejected the supernatural aspect. IMHO it's not essential. You can still have a useful/helpful faith without it! People have said some pretty amazing and helpful things to help one another over the centuries (mixed in with much craziness of course - you have to use some discernment!) - and continue to offer much loving kindness to one another today, both within faith communities and outside them (perhaps in other communities like this one right here!)