to expect nursery to change my 14mo before I pick her up

[CrazyRainbowLady]

She's in cloth nappies. They have a rule that they change nappies every 3 hours, her changes are usually at 10.30 and 1.30 according to the communications book.
She gets picked up at 4 and I usually run errands or pick up my older dcs from after school clubs etc.
I've asked them several times to please change her before I pick her up as we keep getting leaks from her nappies after pick up, but it rarely happens.
AIBU?

This thread has totally surprised me. We have a regular pick up time from nursery too and DS is always just changed, just in case, as they say.
I never asked for it because we normally head straight home but ladies at nursery said that if there's a "set" pick up time they tend to change nappies just before that.
If it was important to me, I would certainly ask politely if they could do it.

We are lovely to all. We accommodate wishes if and when we can, of course we do. We just dont do the "expecting" thing. It becomes out of control and unworkable.

YABU. You're the parent, you change her.

I dont have "contempt" for anyone. I just wish parents would be more reasonable most of the time. We look after 30+ children. Your child is of course important but if you want such an exceptionally high level of care then my advice would be to choose a nanny instead.

Some parents can be so fussy and have some very unreasonable requests. They forget you are on a 1-3 ratio and not just there to jump to there every whim.
I had a mum once that requested they have a clean nappy on for going home each night but mum would at arrive anytime between 4-6. So if we did it at 330 and she didn't arrive till 6 she would moan. In the end we change child when she was due and told mum she was welcome to change her, herself when she arrived. Mum pulled her face and never did change her!

I think sometimes parents forget that we are looking after more than just their baby. And sometimes situations arise that need to be delt with before a nappy change that isn't even due!

I like your style Tinks, stoically defending your corner.

I think you need to change her op, if it's not the policy of the nursery to.

Shocked by the YABU responses. Needs of the child should come first. My nursery change every 2.5 hours or sooner if required (e.g poo, sensitive skin). I change DD before we leave nursery as we have a bit of a drive home and I like to make sure she will be comfortable in car. Nursery staff (who are fab, my DD adores them) always offer to do this for me but if they are busy, I take her to the changing room and do it myself. Wouldn't fancy having to do it in car this time of year, dark and cold outside. YADNBU!!

I don't think asking your child to be changed 30 mins before normal change time, 2 and a half hours after the last change and just before a journey home (where nappy always leaks) is asking too much to be honest.

Phew, thank you chilly. We adore the children always. But like you said, the ratio makes it impossible to please every parent every day. A 1-3 ratio when looking after children can sometimes be very challenging.

I'd challenge every parent that had 3 kids not to agree with this. We are not "super human" we have one pair of hands.

Tinks my nursery is a breastfeeding friendly nursery so mums often pop in to feed and play during the day, does your nursery accommodate this? I only ask because you say you operate a hello/goodbye at the door policy, I'm just being curious that's all.

Do you work in a nursery twofalls? do any of you who bang on about this work in very busy nursery at this present moment where ofsted continually change the requirements? Directives are sent out practically daily.

Tinks your last message is totally reasonable. I get that. It's just the "parents leave the door open". "Parents don't say goodbye", "we love the children, it's the parents we could do without" type comments throughout this thread I was referring to.

Our nursery doesnt cater for babies. It caters for ages 1.5 to 4.

And why is that unreasonable twofalls? Im being very honest and not "flowering" things up.

Oh and another point ofsted. Hate children being made to come away from an activity they are absorbed in for a nappy change that is 'due' I can't believe that some nurseries are changing children every 1-2 hours. Is that to please the parents?? As I can't see it being for the good of the child.

Being a nurse, I sometimes tend to find relatives more of a challenge at times than the actual patient. I have friends who are primary/secondary teachers, and one who works in a nursery....they love their jobs and the kids but can, at times, find the parents to be a little difficult. This is something we sometimes discuss when the subject comes up.
However, I would never (and believe my friends wouldn't) ever take to a public forum and completely slag off the relatives or parents, call them precious or likewise.
It's all very well having an opinion, and its human nature to end up a bit miffed when working with members of the public but thinks you're not coming across very well....quite volatile and unprofessional tbh. Yes your main concern is for the children and I can clearly see from your posts that you do love them...I only hope you manage to pipe down this awful opinion you have of the parents when they're stood right in front of you.

Thanks Bowlersarm too

I felt like I was swimming amongst such precious people. Glad reasonable came to the rescue

V4 always leak for me over 2 hours so gave daycare two part system as pretty bomb proof - did give fitting instructions with diagram that's stuck behind changing table and it's worked well.

I often change dc though when I pick him up

Duck... Im out of hours now and don't "need" to speak in a professional manner.

I haven't read the entire thread, but gosh I'm surprised at the answers here. I am unfamiliar with nurseries in the UK, but in my part of the world they wouldn't dream of handing you back your baby without a nappy change.

I do my job purely in a vocational manner. I work with children because I adore each and every one of them. I do switch heads to speak to the parents "professionally".

After I leave work, Im very allowed to speak in an "honest" capacity.

All these "expectations." And then people wonder why Nurseries are so bloody expensive.

So coyacan do you send your baby to nursery in a dry nappy? That's just been change before you arrive?