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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to expect nursery to change my 14mo before I pick her up

235 replies

CrazyRainbowLady · 28/01/2015 19:13

She's in cloth nappies. They have a rule that they change nappies every 3 hours, her changes are usually at 10.30 and 1.30 according to the communications book.
She gets picked up at 4 and I usually run errands or pick up my older dcs from after school clubs etc.
I've asked them several times to please change her before I pick her up as we keep getting leaks from her nappies after pick up, but it rarely happens.
AIBU?

OP posts:
orangeone · 28/01/2015 19:37

Whilst I agree that if you have to run errands after school you should probably check her nappy at pick up and change it as necessary, I disagree with all posters saying nurseries should only change nappies at certain times. Just assume child has nappy change at 10.30am but then does a poo at 10.45am. Is it reasonable to assume child then has to stay in poo filled nappy until the next change time at 1.30pm? I know nurseries have lots of children to look after but they are being paid to provide basic care to child and it's not basic care to leave child in dirty nappy for 2 hours so they end up with terrible nappy rash just because nappy change time is set in a routine at certain times....

Crazycatlady27 · 28/01/2015 19:40

YANBU
If you have requested that she's changed before you collect her at 4 then they should do that.

Tinks42 · 28/01/2015 19:45

Of course the child isnt left in a shitty nappy. That is done as soon as its detected Grin The other is a "standard" changing rota.

And, no, crazycatlady there's isnt a "should" about it.

Mrscog · 28/01/2015 19:45

Bloody hell - just use a paper nappy, they last over 12 hours!

Nolim · 28/01/2015 19:48

Change her at the nursery

WeAllHaveWings · 28/01/2015 19:48

Nursery will be too busy at pickup time to start changing bums (unless its a pooey one). You mentioned cloth nappies (I never used with mine), are they more prone to leaks? could you use a disposable for the 1:30 change?

Lorialet · 28/01/2015 19:55

If they do yours for 4 o'clock then they're going to have to everyone else's (unless you're expecting preferential treatment for some reason). YABU.

Crazycatlady27 · 28/01/2015 19:55

Actually 'Tinks42' if a patent requests a child to be changed before they leave then they should be changed. I work in a nursery and would never ignore a parents request like this. If they are to busy at 4, then they should make an arrangement to change her before they get too busy.
I had a parent ask if their child could have an extra change as they have a long journey home and they regularly would fall asleep in the car sleeping through till morning. I made sure this was done everyday, 15 minutes before collection.

If they are this regimented about the changes, then I wouldn't be surprised if a child is left in a soiled nappy until the routine change time.

Goldmandra · 28/01/2015 19:56

I've worked in nurseries and as a childminder and I have always made sure that children were changed relatively close to pick up time, just as I would if it were me taking them out somewhere. This was fully expected of all the nursery practitioners I worked with.

Changing nappies is part of the job and it needs to be done often enough that the child remains dry and comfortable. If I picked up a child at handover time whose nappy felt full or soggy, I would always offer to change them before they left. It's just what you do.

If you have specifically requested this in order to keep her comfortable before you get home they most certainly should be doing it.

If they don't like changing nappies, they are in the wrong job.

tomandizzymum · 28/01/2015 19:57

Either change her in the car or put a terry cloth on the car seat.

Viviennemary · 28/01/2015 20:00

I think the solution is to change her youself at the nursery. If the only reason she is leaking is because you have to do pick ups and so on then that isn't the nursery's problem.

MacGotFat · 28/01/2015 20:03

My nursery always offered to change DS's nappy if it hadn't been done recently at pick up time (and I tend to pick up at massively random times due to shift work!)
Perhaps they don't 'have' to, but I don't think yabu to ask...

sofatastic · 28/01/2015 20:04

What a bizarre set of responses! You are paying for childcare. You are the customer.

YADNBU

Tinks42 · 28/01/2015 20:05

Yes but you "pick up at random times" not when its bedlam/handover time.

Tinks42 · 28/01/2015 20:07

Yes, you are paying for childcare but you "arent" paying for one on one care here.

WD41 · 28/01/2015 20:10

I've never used cloth nappies, are they particularly leaky? As I can't imagine a disposable leaking within 2.5 hours.

Could you ask the nursery to put her into a disposable at the 1:30 change? If you're not able to change her until you get home I think that would give you more grace

foxtrotcharlie · 28/01/2015 20:13

Thank goodness for the last couple of nursery worker posters confirming you are not being unreasonable. Nursery always change dd or let me change her somewhere warm and comfy if i pick her up and she hasn't been changed in past hour. (also a cloth bum) No way would i keep her in a nursery that were unable to be flexible on something so easy to accommodate.

Toadsrevisited · 28/01/2015 20:14

I use cloth at nursery too but would expect to get 4-5 hours from a nappy. What kind of nappy and wrap are you using?

ChazzerChaser · 28/01/2015 20:17

I find lots of the responses quite odd too. My nursery would do that if I asked, they do all sorts of helpful things like that, never a sniff of it being a problem if it doesn't fit into their routine. Late for breakfast - they fetch some from kitchen, can't get there for standard lunchtime - they save a plate, collecting at a particular time and in a rush - they get him ready for me. That's normal at my nursery.

Tinks42 · 28/01/2015 20:19

The key word here was "expect" if everyone "expected" this then it would be unworkable. To ask whether a worker would "mind" doing this I'm sure the wouldn't.

Tinks42 · 28/01/2015 20:20

they

Goldmandra · 28/01/2015 20:25

The key word here was "expect" if everyone "expected" this then it would be unworkable.

No it wouldn't. It should be part of their practice anyway.

IndecisionCentral · 28/01/2015 20:25

I was amazed horrified by the first page of responses. Our nursery wouldn't blink at such a request. I've several times said we're going in a long journey at such and such a time and they'll sleep in the car, nursery had no issue adjusting meal time, dressing in PJs and new nappy.

DD has dreadful skin and needed extra nappy changes and they changed her 6x a day. They suggested it.

I'm sat here feeling v grateful for my nursery. That said OP, if this is an ongoing issue they can't contend with then I guess it's disposables for last nappy of the day or a change in the boot of the car.

Original poster
CrazyRainbowLady · 28/01/2015 20:28

toads mostly EF v4s. We used Gs for a while and they got very confused with them.. We also use 2 parters but some of the staff struggle with those, so we stuck to something nice and simple.

OP posts:
naty1 · 28/01/2015 20:28

Yanbu.
They should change- what if your journey home took an hour.
But then i picked dd up from nursery stinking and sat with her key worker. She couldnt be bothered to change her or ask someone else to - as she knew she would be picked up soonish.
Though in this situation i would give a disposable nappy for just that last change.