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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be so upset at being flat chested?

167 replies

alrighty · 23/01/2015 14:48

Can go for a boob job at the moment.i refuse to wear padded bras as they are so deceiving.
men would get a shock to find there's nothing there.i don't feel feminine,i had hoped that after having children things would improve but no,same as before.i actually feel like crying.the shame at going in a shop to buy a bra from "my first bra" selection.why there isn't some kind of hormonal therapy or something? This cant be normal.im a size 10/12 and couldn't stand to get any fatter,so putting on weight is not a option.

OP posts:
Original poster
alrighty · 23/01/2015 14:50

That should be "cant go for a boob job..."

OP posts:
SouthernComforts · 23/01/2015 14:54

Hi op, have you measured yourself the mn way properly? I was convinced I was an A/B cup until I did.

I was wearing 36A When I'm a 32C! I'm a similar size and when I lie down they disappear.

I wear padded bras! Its not deceiving anyone if it gives you a confidence boost and makes you feel better in yourself.

I would have a boob job tomorrow so I sympathise, but I've learned to accept my shape for now.

CheeseBored · 23/01/2015 14:55

YABU. small boobs are youthful, look way better in clothes therefore making you look more stylish and supposedly are more sensitive than big knockers. You can be feminine and have small tits.

ElectraInExcelsis · 23/01/2015 14:56

YANBU - your feelings about such things are entirely personal. I'm sorry this is getting you down.

StatisticallyChallenged · 23/01/2015 14:57

Please don't be offended, but may I ask what size you are wearing and where you have been fitted?

The reason I ask is that there are a lot of very very bad bra fitters about (I've run in to plenty) who use an old fashioned method which overestimates band size and underestimates cup. Might not be the case here, but it's worth checking as it would maybe give you a better selection?

fitting advice here

I know how shitty it is to feel an odd size - I'll be honest and say I'm actually busty, but looking back about 10 years it was almost impossible to get bras which fitted me. They made a tiny handful, and none really fitted right as they were the wrong shape. It made me feel like shit!

Original poster
alrighty · 23/01/2015 14:57

Look better in clothes? No,a size b/c looks good in clothes.no tits doesn't look good anywhere.unless there's a scarf or cowl neck covering the chest.

OP posts:
SacredHeart · 23/01/2015 14:57

I would love a flat chest (I'm 34E), sometimes we just have to accept what we have.

I bet there's loads of clothes that you can wear I couldn't dream of getting away with plus swimming costumes and bikinis are much better for smaller busts and you won't trip over them when you're old.

Keep your chin up.

Original poster
alrighty · 23/01/2015 14:59

I don't usually wear any bras.i feel rodicplous with a empty bra on
only one that would fit is first bra kind of brand.i definitely positive that the issue is not wrong measurement.but thanks anyway.

OP posts:
LadyLuck10 · 23/01/2015 15:01

Yanbu, it's personal to you and therefore a valid concern. Have you discussed this with your doctor?

GotToBeInItToWinIt · 23/01/2015 15:02

YANBU, you feel how you feel. But just wanted to let you know that I'm a size 10-12 and a size 32G and they make my life an absolute misery. I cry every summer when I realise again that I can't wear 95% of the clothes in the shops as you can't wear a bra with them or I literally just can't fit my boobs in. And I cry in the winter when my chest looks like a shelf in jumpers!

SaucyJack · 23/01/2015 15:02

YANBU. It's your body and you are entitled to your view.

Are you sure going braless helps tho? A t-shirt bra would probably give you a better shape under clothes.

originalusernamefail · 23/01/2015 15:03

I would gladly give you my post baby 32GGs! I literally trip over them if I go to the loo at night Blush. I look fatter in clothes (can't say fat cos I'm fat anyway - but they make me look fatter) and matronly.

If I was brave enough I'd get them reduced to a b/c cup. However I think feminity is a state of mind, check out Kendall Jenner / Kate Moss etc. They are small of nork but held up as the "perfect woman" by the fashion houses.

Original poster
alrighty · 23/01/2015 15:03

Its quite embarrassing.and don't see how gp could help,unless they do something about it on the nhs?
would they be able to offer any therapies?

OP posts:
originalusernamefail · 23/01/2015 15:04

Feel your pain re: summer clothes GotTo

Chillyegg · 23/01/2015 15:04

Aww love I'm sorry it gets you down!

I second what others have said about getting refitted!

I'd love to have smaller boobs! I'm rather busty and can't fit into certain shops clothes ontop that are my actual size or I look terrible!
It's one of those tricky ones I know I've been there in the past wanting what I can't have (small boobs and white blonde hair) and I'm stuck with my saggy spaniel ear boobs and my crazy curly hermione granger hair.

Original poster
alrighty · 23/01/2015 15:06

I hear all those that say they would want smaller breasts.but i really know you mean small breasts rather then no breasts/completely flat.even tshirts don't look good.and bikinis,lets not even mention it.

OP posts:
chockbic · 23/01/2015 15:07

Bear in mind that breast enlargement is a lifetime commitment, with scarring and other risks.

Original poster
alrighty · 23/01/2015 15:07

The only good thing is that they made a lot of milk.but i honestly feel bad for DP,every time he touch me i think he must be wishing for something more to touch.

OP posts:
BitOutOfPractice · 23/01/2015 15:08

I feel quite annoyed with the people saying "it could be worse, you could have massive boobs" because that is tantamount to telling you that you're not entitled to feel how you feel. If that's how you feel it's how you feel and it is perfectly valid

Why is a boob job out at the moment. I think I would consider it if it is making you feel this miserable

nannynannynannynanny · 23/01/2015 15:08

Have you tried the combined pill? I only ask because I go up a good cup size whenever I'm taking that. I'm pretty much flat chested without it. It makes my bum bigger too (which is why I won't come off it no matter how hard the doc tries to persuade me! I'd be an ironing board without it)

But I completely sympathise. It's so hard to feel sexy when 12 year old boys have more curves.

SaucyJack · 23/01/2015 15:08

I really don't think telling the OP how massively big your own tits are is helpful some of you.

Original poster
alrighty · 23/01/2015 15:08

Not sure why its bothering me so much lately

OP posts:
chockbic · 23/01/2015 15:09

I doubt he's feeling that but it's easy to put your feelings about it onto him.

Look at yourself as a whole, amazing person who is loved.

Sorry if that's a bit fromage.

StoneFoxMama · 23/01/2015 15:10

Yanbu. I was exactly like you, had nothing to speak of and was miserable so I totally understand what you are feeling.
I was lucky enough to have surgery, and I am now a very natural looking 28dd which is sounds big but they are nice and small (the surgeon refused to use anything bigger as there was no room for them) and pert but more importantly they are actual boobs and no one would ever know.
The op was expensive, around £8,000 7 years ago with a highly regarded surgeon. But looking back I wonder if I'd have been eligible on the nhs as my surgeon told me my breast tissue was virtually non existent. It might be worth speaking to your doctor. If not, I think these days it can be done for a bit less and many surgeries offer payment plans, if you are serious.

PersonalClown · 23/01/2015 15:10

Would you like some of mine?
I've got more than enough to spare.

I've started a diet to try and get my BMI down to be considered for a reduction. 36K. Sad