So angry and upset I may explode

[Edenviolet]

A close family member has obtained information regarding some medical issues/procedure and tests I have had/will be having done.

Its private, REALLY private. Something dh and I wanted to keep to ourselves.

The information was in paperwork (a letter and some general info) at my house that this family member has obviously snooped through. Now, for whatever reason she thinks it is appropriate to divulge this other members of the family/friends.

I feel heartbroken and also extremely angry. I don't want everybody to know and I actually feel violated. What sort of person goes through other people's paperwork then lets out private medical information?

AIBU to be this upset, and is there anything I can actually do (apart from hiding away and crying like I want to)

If she'd saved all the money she spent on her 'bottom drawer' she'd be closer to having her deposit. My SIL, who is an alcoholic, spent so much on cushions that she couldn't afford the sofa she wanted to scatter them on ... I'm not suggesting your sis is an alky, but does she have some sort of problem with cognitive function, ie, planning? Or is she just entitled with no boundaries? Either way, I hope your mum gives her a stern talking to.

Good on your dh! and . He sounds a gem and a keeper!

Good luck with it all. Don't let it sour things for you. Put it 'over there' and look forwards.

OP, did your DH or DM challenge her about going through all your papers? How on earth can your 'D'Sis think that's acceptable?

Both of them told her how out of order it was to read and divulge private information, as did a couple of other family members, the rest are appalled but were so shocked at what she said I don't think they said anything to her as wondered what on earth was going on.

Dsis is just one of those people, its all me me me with her which up until now I thought was just an unfortunate personality trait, never imagined it could develop into this though.

I am glad that others are on your side, well she has really put herself in a wonderful light to the family. Basically she is coming across as a spiteful, cruel, nasty individual.

I just can't get my head around what a total bitch she is. Disrespectful and careless to tell people and downright fucking rude to express her opinion on what you spend your money on.

This has to be the worst thread if this type I've ever read in MN. It just keeps getting worse !!! She is unbelievable.

Sending you shed loads of baby dust and hoping you are very successful in your ivf

To echo the hundreds of others on this thread, as if you need to be told, your sister is a fucking bitch of the highest order. I am totally agog that she can really think that way.

and for you OP. I feel for you. I would hate it if anyone read anything at all that was addressed to me even if it were just the window cleaners's bill.

I wish I could insert a horseshoe here.

Wow. Just wow. How spectacularly has she shown her true colours? Not just to you but to your entire family by the sounds of things.
The bit about 'knowing how it feels to not have something you really want' was accompanied by the sound of my jaw hitting the floor. How jealous and petty can you be?
One day she's going to wake up and realise how awful she is.

Good grief, your sister seriously is a fucked up individual, isn't she? I do hope she's not going to constantly drip poison in your mum's ear and that your mum gives her what for, if she does)

Your DH has been excellent, though.

Oh OP I'm sorry, you're sister really is a pustule of nastiness isn't she? Are you planning to see her again or write her off?

OP I'm so sorry this happened to you - it's quite shocking when you finally realise what someone who is so close to you is like.

I'm glad your DH and your family are rallying and also telling your sister off! Good luck with everything

Speechless, really, I am speechless.

Good on your DH! And you both stay strong and keep her out of your lives. She obviously has no boundaries and cannot be trusted anywhere by anyone!

What a stupid nasty excuse for a woman.

I can't believe none of the family told her to shut the fuck up.

What.a.fucking.bitch

Utter, grade a, out and out bitch.

Self centred, selfish, thick and downright nasty.

I'm very glad your DH told her exactly what he thinks. Perhaps one day what he said to her will actually penetrate that thick skull of hers.

Fwiw I would never, ever speak to her again. Disgusting individual

Fucking hell. I start IVF for a second child in March and this thread has really upset me, how fucking dare she. The only thing I can think of to motivate her is jealousy, does she have no partner or children and resents your happy family?

You're doing the right thing cutting her out. Her actions were appalling but then encouraging the rest of your family to unite against you is borderline evil. You don't need someone like that in your life. If I was your mother I would be cutting her out too.

Oh op. I've read all your replies - you poor thing.

Just want to say I'm sorry. You sound lovely and really shouldn't try and justify her horrid behaviour at all and stick up for her.

She is disgusting. Your DH sounds wonderful though so just make sure she knows you don't expect to hear from anyone else that she's told them and wash your hands of her.

Wishing you lots of luck.

Good grief, Waiting, how awful she has been. I'm glad the rest of your family understand this.

Does she have a mental health condition? Am not saying this to excuse her, just wondering, as one of my siblings has a long-term severe MH conditions, often presents as perfectly neurotypical (she isn't, has proper diagnosis) , but everything, just everything, is about her - and I've tried to learn to walk away from when she does this, as nothing I can do or say will change this.

(But I wouldn't be able to walk away from what yours has done to you. )

I have read the entire thread with my gob hanging open in total disbelief!!! Who the hell does she think she is??

Just want to throw in my support for you op x

Snooping and broadcasting bad enough, to tell you that you're throwing away your money was cruel. To brazenly try and justify her actions - awful.

Very best of luck with the treatment.