To think swans have no business having teeth?

[ArsenicFaceCream]

Well?

MNHQ? What? Where??

Just seen a story on line about a swan committing suicide because it's mother had been killed.

oh no it was not in The Mail on Line

That's sad

I'm going to adopt sad looking swans now just in case.

Do you know that when a greyhound smiles they make a snarling rottweiler look cuddly.
You see Greyhounds are all teeth but as soft as butter (cuddles pointy hound lying next to me on the sofa)

A swan rescued me from an evil goose that was trying to mug me in St James Park, I had run out of bread to feed them and the bastard goose snatched my toy cat, Midnight, out my hand and waddled off with it til Super Swan attacked the goose, making him drop Midnight, then chased him off.
Midnight was covered in crumbs and half eaten quavers, probably some ice cream/icing, maybe some half chewed sweets, as all toddlers toys are on a picnic with Grandma so they were probably fighting over about a weeks worth of food hidden in her fur but poor Midnights ear was hanging off.

Point is, its not the swans with teeth you want to worry about, its the damn geese!

In Britain, a swan's only predator is the Queen. Wear a crown. It keeps them away.

"Penguins, now they're pretty perfect imo."

Erm.... not really. I went to London zoo and the keepers had to put one of the really naughty rockhopper penguins in with the big penguins because he was making life miserable for the other rockhoppers.

He was tiny compared to the big penguins but he just stood there glaring and looking belligerent like a stoppy toddler having a massive sulk.

Huge Galapogos tortoises are perfect. I defy anyone to say anything a huge Galapagos tortoise has done that is any way bad. OK living 100 years refusing to procreate and then dying into extinction is pointless but not actually bad. They don't have teeth either.

Our local zoo has a rockhopper penguin that always wears a jumper.. Maybe the naughty one was just miffed at being cold?

I, for one, welcome our toothy swan overlords.

I, for one, welcome our toothy swan overlords

Galapagos tortoises smell very very very bad!!!

The toothy swans are our overlords?

Should we bow down to them?

We live in a village in a Norfolk valley, next to a chain of small lakes and a river. The water birds arrive in droves, all sorts, and fly over our house at dawn and dusk (often pooing on our blessed car and windows. How on earth does a bird poo sideways like that onto a vertical surface??)

I get up very early, and often see a skein of swans going over. Their necks are stretched out straight as they fly, and the rosy dawn light on their wings makes the sight magical. They do indeed make a whooshing noise with every wing beat. I get quite choked up. Especially when I have to wipe the poo off the windows

I get quite choked up. Especially when I have to wipe the poo off the windows

Well that would do it, I suppose.

It turns out that swans don't eat fish they

I didn't realise that MNHQ people just...chatted.... Like real people do...

Yes, but mostly undercover, I think.

Lweji - that is really strange watching the swans feeding the fish.

I think it must be a natural response to the 'gape' of the fish that triggers a feeding instinct like they would do with a cygnet.

A swan attacked my friend's toddler once. Bastard thing came bursting through a row of shrubbery like an assassin. Friend swung her handbag at it while yelling 'Come on then, you shitstick!'. I was unable to assist due to losing all ability to function through mirth.

I think it must be a natural response to the 'gape' of the fish that triggers a feeding instinct like they would do with a cygnet.

Probably. :)
It is still looks weird, though, I agree.

@APotNoodleandaTommy

I didn't realise that MNHQ people just...chatted.... Like real people do...

Do you know that MNHQ ARE real people????

Cygnets don't gape at their parents for food though, they feed themselves from day 1.

Real people and The Borg

Some are more real than others that Olivia , except when they bugger orf to have babies by the litter.

What about deer? They'll attack you for a sandwich. At least the ones in Knowle Park do.

Make that Knole Park.