There is another issue. Just as there are different denominations of Christianity, different branches of Judaism, there are different kinds of Islam. There are differences between Sunni, Shi'a and within Sunni there is Sufi ( which could be described as mystical and spirit led; ultimately reliant on God's mercy.) and Wahadi (more hard line of literal interpretation, certainties of black and white; following the letter of the law; ultimately good works are weighed and count for or against you.) They are quite different.
Then in the UK there all kinds of interdenominational crossovers, intergenerational play, people from all kinds of backgrounds coming together and their children having to find their own path. What is a 'good muslim' to an extremist is to make a stand against compromise.
So OP I wholeheatedly agree with you. Discussion is needed between us all, in calm and friendly ways, casual settings. It is no good to come to the discussion telling others they are all wrong or to change.
The little things and the slightly bigger things that make up our lives are good to talk about, good to share. Good to come to a shared solution that works for us all and brings reconciliation and a greater understanding and real peace for all (not just some).