To truly hate being pregnant?!

[TheHermitCrab]

Arrrgh. Needed a rant.

38 weeks pregnant. I have hated every moment of it! but had very little reason to lol.

Never had morning sickness (Well I was queasy but nothing worth whinging about)

But the aching, pulling every muscle, general 9 months of feeling like shit. discharge (tmi!), stretch marks from my chin to my toes, waiting around for midwifes, hearing the same shit from people asking about my baby and bump..etc (I'm not a people person, can you tell)

Now I'm 38 weeks, and 4ft 11, I'm pretty much a walking bump. Getting out of bed is like a turtle stuck on its back. All arms and legs. My knees hurt, my legs hurt, my back hurts.

Strangers ask me how long I have. And people keep telling me how much I will miss my bump (no!) and the sleep (what sleep?! the 3 hours of pain I get on my side?) and how much they all loved being pregnant, I don't even like the movements, I feel invaded, haha.

They are lying to me yes? I didn't even glow. In fact I'm covered in blue veins, I look like death.

(Comments about how I should be lucky I'm pregnant at all need not be posted, I'm not looking for sympathy...etc)

I just can't wait for this little beggar to be out and then the "fun" can get started! ;)

YANBU I hated being pregnant!!

And at 5'1" I know exactly how you feel with the whole turtle moves in the morning. I resembled Violet from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory during my first pregnancy (apart from the blue).

I hated both my pregnancies. Both were easy pregnancies (although awful births) but I just felt like my body wasn't my own. . Which I guess it wasn't. And I hated that.

In fact I hate the whole baby thing until they get to about 2 too. Luckily I love them both regardless and from 3 onwards I realise why I decided to have them in the first place !

Gudgyx Glad you're enjoying it so much! most people IRL I know love/loved it!

Hey tell you what though you did make me think of a positive. I have/had terrible IBS. Used to plague me at least once a week, In so much pain I had to stand at my desk, come straight home and lie down and not eat, ever since being pregnant I haven't had one sign of IBS!

So thanks for reminding me of that :D

The notion that we should know how lucky we are to have a surviving continuing pregnancy is exactly why I didn't find any enjoyment in the eventually successful pregnancy I had.

I was a wreck emotionally before I even started on the physical stresses. I lived in the limbo fear of whether this one would survive or not, the feeling like I was betraying prior losses if this one did, the fear of bonding incase I lost it at the last hurdle.

I hated the unknown, the lack of garantuees. The fear. Hated it so much I had SEVERE antenatal depression and still having intensive therapy 3 years on just to try and live a normal life again.

How dare you suggest that there is no real battle for women who have successful pregnancies

Strawberrytot That is such a brilliant picture! Never thought of that comparison, I keep thinking I look like Patrick from Sponge Bob when I'm sat in the bath!

Its amazing Hermit - I didnt find out til I was 12 weeks gone, but thinking back all my symptoms must have stopped pretty much right away! Wish someone somewhere would link whatever it is that makes pregnancy help it and come up with some magic medicine for us!

Faffyduck xxx

'truly hate' being pregnant is a very strong statement, that you have to realise will affect people that have been through neonatal deaths and stillbirths

if you had worded it differently you could have had a rant and moan without sounding offensive to others

perhaps think on

Gudgyx I found it very strange! I thought "She's crushing my intestines, I'm constipated, why am I in less pain??" Very odd!

I mean I've traded it for different pains, but the IBS pain was a bitch lol!

I can't believe I would have to respond to how I worded my post.

In fact.... The fact I worded how much I hate pregnancy should encourage those offended by people hating pregnancy to not indulge in the thread. Or, if they are just argumentative it will encourage them to come and have a go at me, which, is their own fault.

Either way, my title was clear enough for people to know what it was about. Which I think is much better than it being vague.

I definitely didn't lead people into this thinking it was one thing when it was another. I said it how it was.

It wouldn't matter what I named it, the same people would make the same comments. Don't be daft :)

Next time I'll name the thread "I am so lucky and blessed I am pregnant but... "

And then have the text saying how much I hate it...

And then people won't make them comments right? lol

I'm not going to waste my time arguing with you
but I advise you to think on
saying you 'truly hate' being pregnant
is very different to say really struggling with this pregnancy

I don't think you understand what you've actually said really

perhaps just think about it

Well I'm going to say it again. I DID "truly hate" being pregnant.

I love being a mother however.

Think on, about how I titled a thread? No. It's not that important to me. It is to you.

Everyone bar one (And you) have taken it the wrong way.

So think on about how personally you are taking a thread title.

And think on about how patronising you sound while we are talking about how to word things.

You know what I think? When I read a thread title about something I know I won't enjoy? I don't click on it. For instance, I like Russell Brand, I know there is a thread a week on here about what a prat he is. So I'll have a read if I'm bored, but not take it to heart, or start an argument, or I just won't click on it. People can say things how they like. And sure, you can take them how you like. But I wouldn't expect people to change the way they communicate, just so a mere few are not offended by the type of words they use.

Just think on.

magicpixie just because she hates pregnancy doesn't mean she hates her baby so i struggle to see what your problem is. Those mothers who have had losses for various reasons have my sympathy but how one woman titles a thread on a forum won't make it any better for them.

And yes I truly hate being pregnant. Out of all the body problems I have had in my life. Or being a size 8 then a 16 then a 10 then a 14, my various medical problems, my life problems, my depression...etc. Pregnancy is one thing I have truly hated.

I am truly excited about being a mother, and my and my partner are truly happy about having this baby.

:)

nice attitude

all I am saying to you, is that if your baby was stillborn or died shortly after being born, you would probably find the way you have worded this offensive
and that perhaps you could think about this

anyway, I'm not wasting another second on someone like you.
so I am off

just try and think about others not just yourself

Chunderella

Very intelligent point, and something people will easily not take into consideration when discussing pregnancy and fertility. Not spoken about much but is something many women put up with for their lives. Child brides at 12 being turned into baby making machines, pregnancy through rape and abuse, the list could go on for people who are pregnant and have had the situation forced upon them.

That's why I never consider comparisons about my own health and wellbeing against others. Always people doing better, always people having it worse. We are all living our own experiences. And I can empathise or sympathise with those in all situations, while living and experiencing mine too.

I have lost a child. She lived for 47 minutes and i still don't find it fucking offensive However I find you offensive so take your own bloody advice!

magicpixie

Maybe I should think about the way I worded it in case I have a stillborn child?

Maybe I should never argue with my OH in case he gets run over by a bus?

Maybe I should call my dad daily in case he dies tomorrow?

Or maybe I should live for what's happening now and not live in fear.....

Anything we do or say today could feel so different tomorrow. But hindsight is a wonderful thing.

I'm not avoiding saying or doing things everyday in case something happens to counteract it. How stressful would that be?

Why is it offensive to hate being pregnant? In the absence of an unborn baby would anyone be expected not to hate heartburn, agonizing back and pelvic pain or vomiting up blood? I truly hated being pregnant, it doesn't mean I don't adore my new baby.

Blackout234

Well said. I don't think people realise they don't have the right to speak for a majority.

OP, I'm with you! Second pregnancy and 34 weeks and can't wait for baby to be induced at 37 weeks! Looking forward to baby coming but hate pregnancy and having to smile through clenched teeth when DH keeps going on about having the next one (this is his first).
I don't understand the issues from some posters? You read the OP, if you don't like it, don't read it.
Meh