To hate faffers everywhere!

[Freshlysqueezed]

Why are there so many faffers -buying cinema tickets, going to the Post office etc - someone in front always has to have an issue and take twice as long as they should, drivers taking 10 minutes to get in a space 4 times the size of their car, people taking forever over a simple food order - I could go on!

King faffer.....not facer.

Every morning without fail as soon it's time to go to school ds disappears to the loo for a number 2

daisychain Loving your work.

froome I guess I'm your worst nightmare in bars, then. If it's one I don't know, I try to peer into fridges behind the counter or at the bottles on the shelves to see if they've got anything I like. But if it's crowded or I can't see, then most often it goes "I'd like an x" "We don't stock that" "Ok, well a y then" "We've run out of that" "Well what do you have?" "There's a, or b, or c..." "I don't like any of those. What else?"

I don't drink beer / lager and only certain ciders. Most wine served in pubs is horrible. If it's a good bar with a wide range of drinks there will be lots of choice for me. But smaller ones or pubs with a very limited range, it takes a while to find something I like. What am I supposed to do?

Metro Centre today was full of faffers
I'm quite restrained in my frustration but my friend just gets this look of quiet amazement/indignation on his face when someone' faffing causes a hold up. I had to hold the laughter in a couple of times.

My dh is a dreadful faffer at the airport security conveyor belt check in. He waits until it's his turn before he takes off his jacket, belt and shoes, sighing deeply all the time to show his displeaure at having to do it. He then stands at the end, while he puts it all back on again, getting in the way of everyone. It really annoys me.

Can I add work faffeurs? People who have a 2pm meeting and instead of gathering their stuff in good time wait until dead on 2 to faff about finding their pens, paper, finding the meeting room and choosing their seat at the table.

Also, getting people out of the workplace to go to the Christmas do. You know you won't get your grub until at least an hour after the scheduled time because of the faffeurs who leave late!

at the train station a broom has been left leaning against the wall and someone must of knock it down so now the handle lay across the floor. As I am walking through the barrier this guy starts trying to explain about how its a H&S issue to some train staff. I wondered what he was going on about and then as I walked round te corner saw the problem, bent down picked it up and put it against the wall again.

I didn't think what a faff over nothing couldn't he have just picked it up [hmmm]

Is a female Pfaffer a Pfaffeuse?

I will admit to getting 2yo ds to pay for stuff in shops - but only when there's no queue, and only in the "proper" shops (butcher, baker, market) where they recognise us and chat anyway. And he's usually got the money in his hand while we're queuing - I'm determined he'll grow up at least marginally efficient!

I am the anti-faffer. I am the most efficient person I know. I am surrounded by a world of faffers. My partner is one of the most hopeless faffers in the world. He makes a cup of green tea, goes to the toilet and checks all the doors are locked whilst I am sitting in the car grinding my teeth with impatience waiting to go.

I live in a town with more faffers than anywhere I have ever been. It is a ridiculously pleasant town and has a very aging population. The pavements are filled with affluent old people, leaning on walking frames or stopping their mobility scooters for a chat. Trying to buy anything in a shop, order at a cafe or just get on with your business is almost impossible. Cash points are jammed with confused oldies staring hopelessly at the screens. The fish stall forever has a little old lady who wants to know the finer details of every single different type of fish before she finally buys the smallest morsel that wouldn't feed a fly.

The roads are jammed with the slowest drivers, who are confused by roundabouts and never know when to give way. I know I will be old one day, but when does it happen? When will I become like this? I panic at the thought of it. Is it a sudden thing or does it slowly creep up on you?

mitzi I think, in all honesty, you should probably stay at home

I have no idea what other ladies are up to, there are never enough publc loos normally to be fair, but as i stand in the queue i often want to murder the others in there.. What is going on ? ? I think they are out the back in a tardis or gone to Narnia..

I hate and abide faffers. can we extend the faffing thing to people who can not make a decision about the simplest of things.

I'm thinking the kind of the kind of person who can't decide where they want to meet for coffee, what film they want to see. This really winds me up.
I have a lovely friend, but she drives me to distraction, as she always wants me to decide or take the lead about wht we do/ where we go.

I don't think she even realises she does it most of the time!

Oh Christ. I'm with you. Faffing just gets my goat. People being inefficient also bugs me. Thanks to a ridiculous lifestyle I get really frustrated with people who waste my time. I try to be more zen about it as it is my reaction and I should be in control of it (but why do the slowest people insist on spreading out and taking up the entire pavement? Or just randomly stopping?)

I have never known anyone to faff as much as DH. In the time it takes me to get 3yo DD ready (pee, wash hands, shoes on, jacket on, water bottle ready, snack ready, stand by door), and myself ready (same) he will just about manage to put his jacket on. Then he will go check himself in the mirror, come back, put his shoes on sooooo goddam slowly, find his wedding ring, put that on, hunt around for his phone, check his blackberry, wipe his head, have a glass of water... The whole time I'm standing there silently divorcing him in my head. EVERY SIBGLE FUCKING TIME.

And the killer is that he then moans to me about how he hates being late.

The only thing that makes me angrier is people in front of me at the checkout at the supermarket with stuff that isn't labeled or priced up. I know it's not their fault but it makes my seeeeeeeethe and hiss with fury each time I see the cashier ring up for help. FFS people!!! Just get on with it!!!

mitzi I proper belly laughed at the thought of you at the bar. And now have a very unimpressed baby lying on my chest.

All us faffers are children of organised neurotic non faffers who took charge of us.
In turn our children will become organised and independent, It's a cycle I'm sure!

My DH is a faffer of the greatest ability. No matter where we are going he finds time to faff.
If going out for the day I pack lunch, organise tickets, satnav, dress child, ensure phones are charged declare we are ready....and he suddenly has to go the loo/move something from his car/make a call/faff around doing nothing.

Our DD gave him away 'I prefer you to take me swimming and to school mummy as dad always makes me late'...because of his bloody faffing .

Oh and as a aside to DH's faffing = when he offers to make a cup of tea, it either ends at putting the kettle on, or I get a cup of lukewarm liquid because he started making it, forget then uses water boiled 30mins ago. Sheer frustration!

Ha. The most ridiculous situation is when they are trying to be quick though. They are so out of practice it's almost comical sometimes.

We are on holiday at the moment. Over breakfast we decided what to do for the day. I mention baby DS needed bfeeding as well as his porridge. DH (king of faffers when anything other than work is involved) started getting huffy and said I should do it in the car while he was getting a paper 'or we'll never get out before lunchtime'.

I got everything else ready (5mins) whilst DS was finishing his porridge. Put shoes etc on.....DH disappears into the loo.

Had DS fed and waiting in the time DH took to have a dump.

YANBU. Faffers are so infuriating. The worst are (IMO) top of escalator faffers - keep moving FFS, where do you think the people behind you will go?!!
Also petrol station faffers. It's simple: get out of car, pay at pump, put petrol in, get back into car, drive off. Don't piss about rummaging in your handbag, or checking yourself in the mirror, or buying your whole bloody week's shopping in the tiny but overpriced shop (which is 500 feet from the main, big, cheaper shop).
And supermarket dawdlers/faffers drive me insane too. I do not wish to spend my entire day in the supermarket. I want to get in, buy the things I have on my list, pay for it and get out. If you want to spend all day wandering around aimlessly and looking dazed/bewildered/moronic, that's fine. Just don't do it in the middle of the aisle, or in front of what I want to buy, move out of the bloody way.
Aargh!!

My OH is a prime faffer too. As is his dad. If we need to be somewhere at 2pm he starts to get ready at 2pm.

Then when he's ready suddenly needs to lock the back gate (which has been unlocked for over a week as I use it daily) then go for a poo then suddenly become fascinated by something on his desk which has been there forever then he will rush out to the car and imply he's been waiting for me all the time !

We were going to the theatre and he was doing his "walk like a toddler" ie stopping to look at a snail on the pavement, a road sign which has been there since forever etc and I said, "we need to get a move on it starts in 10 minutes" he replied, so we'll be a bit late (still looking at the river ) and I replied through gritted teeth"if we are late we don't get in until the interval and these tickets cost £20 each and I have wanted to see this for a long time" so he says, "why didn't you tell me we had to be there on time?"

Err because that's what you do!

Done to death on MN but I hate people who wait 15 minutes for a bus and then when it arrives and it's their turn to pay, spend 5 minutes searching in their massive bag for their purse/ticket. Same at checkouts, makes me go It's not like it was a surprise that they were going to have to pay.

Dh is a faffer, kids and me all waiting at the front door to leave, dh , no coat on ,etc , eventually gets coat on , goes back to close all internal doors , takes off coat , goes for a wee, goes back closes all doors rpt ... Pre dc I did actually just walk out and go without him.
I did get the rage at an airport once when I have done all packing etc had tickets and dcs passports , auto checked in et al , he handed me his passport to mind , I did say to him are you actually incapable of looking after this yourself now, mind it yourself you are not a child !!!!! And breathe

This thread has cheered me up no end. I thought I was a horrible intolerant bitch (well I am, to be fair) for feeling so much fury at how fucking uselessly inefficient other people are when out and about/in the supermarket/on the roads. Especially on the roads! I feel vindicated by all my fellow faffer-haters.