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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To hate faffers everywhere!

317 replies

Freshlysqueezed · 30/10/2014 19:32

Why are there so many faffers -buying cinema tickets, going to the Post office etc - someone in front always has to have an issue and take twice as long as they should, drivers taking 10 minutes to get in a space 4 times the size of their car, people taking forever over a simple food order - I could go on!

OP posts:
ZingOfSeven · 04/11/2014 16:01

have

it was faffing. she did and re-did her hair. took forever. re-did it again.
made my uncle wait for her for hours, unnecessary.
ridiculous

CaptainJaneSafeway · 04/11/2014 16:21

I sing to my DC:

Do XYZ (insert action of choice, like put on your shoes), do XYZ, do XYZ today,
Do XYZ, do XYZ, before I'm old and grey.

Oh god felix yes about the multitasking! DP will take about an hour and a half to make some pasta with sauce out of a jar, it's unbelievable. He cannot get one thing started (like boiling the water) and then get on with something else meanwhile. It'sd do thing A, then stand around till it's done. Then start thinking about thing B, like where to find the pasta. Once the pasta is cooked and ready, start thinking about the sauce. GGGNNNNNNHHHHH!

NotCitrus · 04/11/2014 16:54

I am an anti-faffer. I think going everywhere by train and bus as a child helped. I may procrastinate but that doesn't affect other people.
MrNC is a faffmeister extraordinaire.

After 20 years I've got him down to bearable levels. The most annoying thing he does now is claim to be "all ready to go" smugly when I'm still getting dressed. I've learnt to respond "No you aren't" as invariably he claims to be ready, he "just" needs to put his shoes on, go to the loo, get a drink for each child, find a tool, make a sandwich...

He is dyslexic and his parents are 10x worse. These are the people who kindly offered to drive to my workplace where I had bought a futon, and drive it and me to my new flat. They arrived 2 hours late (MrNC had warned of this), but it hadn't occured to them to empty the estate car first of the tool box, picnic chairs, hamper, and so much junk that the futon couldn't go in. So we spent the next two hours using the tools to dismantle the thing so it could fit on top of it all.

Once in, I left and got the tube. They arrived three hours later (about an hour drive). There would have been at least an hour of debate about which way to go. They also used to regularly miss flights but now drive to France as ferries are much more understanding. At least they are lovely people and very nice apart from the faffing!

MrNC can do a few one-pan tasty meals, and now has a dyslexic-friendly cookbook that spells out Find these ingredients, a saucepan with lid, and a pan. Put kettle on to boil. Turn on hob. Put x in saucepan, on hob, and add boiling water. Now chop y and z while x cooks, until they look like this picture. It's great!

tiggytape · 04/11/2014 17:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FelixFelix · 04/11/2014 17:57

tiggy what on earth! Grin

HaveToWearHeels · 04/11/2014 18:24

tiggy that is a classic !

fuckmeblindiknowthatcat · 04/11/2014 18:33

Key faffers drive me mad. I leave my keys in the same place every time so I can easily find them. My friend, however:

Me: Let's go
Friend: Hang on, where are my keys?
Me: Where did you leave them?
F: Ohhh...... (leaves room to search for keys)
Me: Are they in the bathroom/bedroom/balcony/under sofa/in your bag?
F: Errrr.......
Me: Do you want me to help you look for them?
F: No, they're here somewhere (rummages through huge bag and tips contents onto floor)

Every time, every fucking time.

stayanotherday · 04/11/2014 18:50

Thanks for this thread! I hate people blocking the barriers at train stations finding their ticket holding up the queue. HAVE IT READY! People who stand in a shop queue for ages then when they're asked for the money acted shocked. People who keep shop assistants talking when there's a queue. People who spend more time messing around than doing whatever it is.

WitchWay · 04/11/2014 19:10

DH faffs & is invariably late - he messes about doing irrelevant stuff until nearly the time we are due to leave before getting ready, upon which he will zoom out of the house with us trailing behind, as if we are holding him up.

He also does the careful selecting of parking-space thing - drives me wild - it's to try to keep his precious car away from other parkers, but of course someone will be right next to his car when we return to it.

WitchWay · 04/11/2014 19:12

My mum faffs with choosing from a menu & always waits till I've chosen, then has the same as me Hmm so sometimes I pick things I think she won't like which I find infuriating!

SonorousBip · 04/11/2014 20:55

I'm still laughing at the term "King of Faffghanistan". Grin

batgirl1984 · 04/11/2014 21:37

Notcitrus is the cook book marketed as dyslexia friendly? Which one is it? Thank

CrohnicallyAnxious · 05/11/2014 03:06

The chip shop near my in laws has just been taken over by new owners. Unfortunately the new staff member who was on last night is a complete faffer so we won't be able to go ever again. DH left just after 5 o'clock to pick chips up, the shop is 2 minutes away, he was the only customer (wonder why), and he didn't return till 6!

Apparently nothing was precooked so he had to start from scratch, frying fish and chips etc. He waited till the food was cooked, wrapped and bagged it, and only then did he start putting peas into pots and buttering the bread rolls!

On the plus side, at least DD's food was cool enough for her to eat by the time it arrived (having sat in a bag on the counter while the bread was buttered etc).

NotCitrus · 05/11/2014 08:04

batgirl it's called What to Cook and How to Cook It, by Jane Hornby. Not marketed to dyslexics in particular, just people not good at cooking who don't know how to follow a brief recipe effectively. It does lead to special supermarket trips for the right ingredients and lots of washing up, but with a dishwasher it's well worth it for a treat.

BertieBotts · 08/11/2014 10:52

Jamie's Ministry of Food is very like the sound of that book too.

batgirl1984 · 09/11/2014 07:27

We have the Jamie book. Will look at the other one.

batgirl1984 · 09/11/2014 07:27

Thank you

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