To want to know what sort of crime someone's dad committed?

[Twentythree9teen]

My son is friends with a nice little girl in primary school, and I talk to her mum from time to time. After she got to know me she volunteered the information that the girl's father was in jail. He's out now, and I've met him, and he's a nice enough bloke, though some people might find him a little scary. He's tall and muscular and gruffly spoken.

He was in jail for roughly three years. When I asked why he was in jail the mother said only "he got in a fight" but claimed it wasn't really his fault.

It occurred to me the other day that I know the family name (a highly unusual one, not Smith), and his case and sentencing must be a matter of public record. I could probably google him right now.

Would you do it? Can any good come of it?

I'm torn between curiosity and feeling I might be better off not knowing. Next time I run into him at the school gates I might not be able to look him in the eye. After all you don't go to jail for three years for "a fight"...

If your daughter is ever likely to be in his care I can see why you are concerned but how would you use the info you gained? What sort of violence would make you feel ok with him looking after her? If it is just a playground friendship then you are just being nosey. That's fine, people are but at least be honest with yourself as to why you are doing it.

I would Google, people tend to down talk bad things and if he was too have anything with my child then I would want to know. I would certainly not tell anyone else though, that's gossip and Im not one for adding to any

Why do you need to know? It's none of your business unless you were thinking of asking the man to look after your child.

Yes it's nosy, but then again curiosity gets the better sometimes. So Google it if you want, if you haven't already, but it's purely because you want to know even though it's not your concern

I'd google it, if he'd gone overboard and battered a burglar half to death, I wouldn't hold that against him, if he attacked someone who was minding their own business then he's dangerous and I wouldn't want him near my kid. There are different types of violence, defensive is natural and can be a good thing, aggressive is not.

I'd have to know tbh.

Ummm, of course I'd google it!

He was in jail for roughly three years. When I asked why he was in jail the mother said only "he got in a fight" but claimed it wasn't really his fault.

This made me laugh! Only because I was imagining my own reaction in the same situation. In spite of being inwardly agog, I would probably have displayed no more than a raised eyebrow, and and "Oh?", before moving swiftly on to reading books or spellings

I'm afraid I probably would have googled as soon as I got home.

I would have googled already.

I'd totally Google.

Yes I would Google. Have you yet?

Google, then come back and tell us.

Google!!!!

Google!!!!

Google !!

I'd google too. I think the vast majority of people would if they're being honest.

'Getting' 3 years is quite a lot for 'getting into a fight', let alone 'serving' 3 years.

However, unless your DS is going there to play (without you) I don't see it as being of any importance and if your DS is going there, you should be upfront enough to discuss it with the Mum if it's worrying you.

I'd have whipped my smartphone out whilst she was saying 'he got in a fight but it wasn't his fault'.

I'd google but I wouldn't be proud of myself and certainly wouldn't mention it to anyone. I feel sorry for the mum and daughter tbh, and possibly the bloke too depending on what happened, it's easier to believe in second chances/clean slates when your kids aren't involved.

I would google, but I wouldn't mention what I had found out to other parents. When the mum told you, she must have realised you'd be able to google their name.

I would definitely google.

But obviously you must tell us what you find, as we don't know him.

If he served 3 years chances are his sentence was a lot higher, and not in line with 'getting into a fight'

Squoosh

Oh and I definitely wouldn't mention it to anyone connected with the school.

Google! !

It wouldn't occur to me not to google.