Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

Bra-less at my BBQ?

551 replies

BioSuisse · 21/09/2014 09:59

Last night DH and i hosted a BBQ for newish friends whom we had never hosted before. DH invited a female colleague whom i had never met before. She turned up with her boyfriend but not her bra. She was wearing a thickish cotton white top. You could see the outline of her boobs and nipples if you looked.

After the party i mentioned it to DH. He claimed to not have noticed.

MN jury?

OP posts:
noddyholder · 21/09/2014 16:55

But she probably just doesn't wear bras full stop lots of people don't and I am sure they don't have special emergency ones for work colleagues bbqs.

ILoveTurnips · 21/09/2014 16:57

PaperClip Of course you can wear what you like at home, you can't seriously be suggesting anyone has said differently. I certainly didn't Hmm. However this woman wasn't at home or even hanging out with her friends she was at the boss's BBQ with people she doesn't know well.

My examples of clothing that can not possible thought of appropriate was in answer to PPs sweeping statements about how people should wear what they like.

Boss's BBQ + big boobs + no bra + white tee = inappropriate (unless your boss is Hugh Hefner or similar)

papercliplover · 21/09/2014 17:03

But it was a private BBQ - you said "turn up to work" in your post ILoveTurnips Confused

noddyholder · 21/09/2014 17:04

The op doesn't mention size though and says you could see the outline if you looked. I have big boobs not firm enough for bra less anymore but even so no one is telling me what is and isn't appropriate when I am socialising I am relaying this to a friend who doesn't MN and she is really laughing

Original poster
BioSuisse · 21/09/2014 17:08

DH has been having an affair with the bra less Russian girl. About a month ago we were very close to moving to Moscow, but i put my foot down and said no (thread in living overseas). DH had an alterior motive to move, to be nearer her. This has been going on for a while. When we didn't move she "became very difficult" so STBXDH moved her to Switzerland. Anyway that is all i have for now. End of thread i think. My permit to live here expires soon and without DH, DCs and i are out of the country. Cannot believe i insisted on inviting her to our home and twatface DH let me do it. Cannot believe he is doing this.

OP posts:
MiddletonPink · 21/09/2014 17:08

Noddy the OP said they were ' Sam Fox size ' so I'm presuming large.

Original poster
BioSuisse · 21/09/2014 17:09

Oh and the boobs are fake and she is 2 years older than me, just to put you all right

OP posts:
MiddletonPink · 21/09/2014 17:10

Christ OP I'm sorry to read that update.

Your hunch was right it would seem.

JanineStHubbins · 21/09/2014 17:10

Oh dear OP. Sorry to hear that. Flowers Maybe repost in Relationships, you will get good advice there.

Tipsykisses · 21/09/2014 17:11

Bio I am so sorry that you've found this out &that you were treated like this on here today .Thanks

BossyLikeBungle · 21/09/2014 17:12

I'm sorry Bio Sad.
Pair of fuckers. Hope you're ok.

whataloadofoldshit · 21/09/2014 17:14

I am very sorry I hear that. What a shock for you, and what complete arseholes they are!

MissBeehiving · 21/09/2014 17:15

Shock Sad

Tipsykisses · 21/09/2014 17:15

And what a twat he is bringing her to your home !!!

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 21/09/2014 17:16

I'm sorry for your update, OP. I was hoping it wasn't true. Second the suggestion to post in Relationships if you want to talk about it away from this thread.

noddyholder · 21/09/2014 17:17

Well they are both dreadful regardless of how she chooses to dress. I am unsure whatbthis thread is about now as I thought it was just someone considered inappropriately dresses at a BBQ. And it is nothing to do with that and everything to do with his deception. You have had a lot of info to take in in 24 hrs esp as you have never met her before.

ilovesooty · 21/09/2014 17:19

I'm not surprised your husband lied to you quite frankly. And how is he now cheating? Have I missed something?
I honestly thought this thread was a joke at first.

ilovesooty · 21/09/2014 17:20

Sorry it seems I missed an update.

papercliplover · 21/09/2014 17:22

I too thought the thread was about her mode of dress at your bbq. Seems it was about something else entirely.

I hope you're ok. Thanks

KatieKaye · 21/09/2014 17:25

Another one who did not read between the lines and thought it was just about bralessness when there was a lot more going on. Very sorry to read he has been cheating on you with this woman and let you invite her to your house.

MiddletonPink · 21/09/2014 17:26

So the OP wasn't wrong to feel it was inappropriate for a woman to turn up to her boss's house without her bra.

There was a motive.

I mean in reality how many bra less women do you all really know.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 21/09/2014 17:29

It's better I think not to read between the lines because posters often do that, try to fill in the gaps, so the annoyance of the OP. A few of us alluded to it on this thread and were shut down in no uncertain terms.

It's disgraceful of him to invite this woman to the home he shares with OP.

papercliplover · 21/09/2014 17:29

The act of going braless to the BBQ was not, in and of itself, inappropriate.

The act of shagging a married man was. Although I'd put more of the blame for that on the Op's husband, since he is the one who made vows and promises. (Assuming braless Russian girl is single)

Original poster
BioSuisse · 21/09/2014 17:31

Apparently i am to blame for insisting she came to our BBQ and meet friends, my friends. And she doesn't have a visa she just turned up here and he has given her some bizarre fake job and the company apartment to keep her quiet because she has been threatening to tell me about them for a while

OP posts:
papercliplover · 21/09/2014 17:31

Middleton - I was a braless woman on Friday night and I have been a braless woman all day today.

The issue isn't the lack of a bra. The issue is the fact that the OP's husband was shagging her.