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AIBU?

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Bra-less at my BBQ?

551 replies

BioSuisse · 21/09/2014 09:59

Last night DH and i hosted a BBQ for newish friends whom we had never hosted before. DH invited a female colleague whom i had never met before. She turned up with her boyfriend but not her bra. She was wearing a thickish cotton white top. You could see the outline of her boobs and nipples if you looked.

After the party i mentioned it to DH. He claimed to not have noticed.

MN jury?

OP posts:
ernesttheBavarian · 21/09/2014 17:31

I am so sorry Bio. :(

How outrageous and bold-faced of both of them to invite her and to attend Shock

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 21/09/2014 17:32

Middleton... No, it's got nothing to do with that, there must be plenty of braless women who go about without taking up with somebody else's husband and it is wrong to call that inappropriate. No need to jump on them for somebody else's infidelity.

The timing is all out of whack anyway, well it doesn't make sense to me.

papercliplover · 21/09/2014 17:33

Oh tell him to get to fuck and go live with her in the company apartment then.

It isn't your fault. Do not let him blame you. None of this is your fault.

CharlieSierra · 21/09/2014 17:33

Sorry your instincts were spot on OP, and really sick at the treatment you have received here. Hope you're ok. Flowers

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 21/09/2014 17:34

What does she do in Switzerland, OP? Does your husband run this company?

... and no, you are not to blame for what your husband does. That's down to him.

KatieKaye · 21/09/2014 17:35

Bio - you are not to blame. This has nothing to do with you and everything to do with the fact your husband is a lying cheat and is trying to assuage his guilt. Don't listen to him. You know you can't trust him so don't believe a word he says

Immigration services might be very interested in the lack of visa if someone was to contact them

MiddletonPink · 21/09/2014 17:35

But paperclip how many women do you know who would turn up to their boss's house without a bra?

Or who would go bra less anywhere?

I don't know any. Not even the girls in their early twenties who are friends with 23 year old ds.

MyFairyKing · 21/09/2014 17:39

Re-post in relationships for support, OP. People won't read your latest post and continue to berate you.

BioSuisse · 21/09/2014 17:39

She doesn't do anything, she has only been here for three weeks. It was all a lie. DH runs the company, he doesn't own it, someone in Russia does.

OP posts:
Tipsykisses · 21/09/2014 17:40

Bio you are not the one at fault he is.

How on earth can he try & twist this on you ?

Do not listen , it is him who couldn't keep it in his pants .

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 21/09/2014 17:42

He's extremely foolish. It sounds as if he's told you many lies upon lies. Do you have somebody you can talk to in RL to get your mind settled about what you want to do next?

papercliplover · 21/09/2014 17:42

Middleton - for the nth time, I myself have gone braless. I went to the shop today braless and out to dinner on Friday night braless. If I'd had the bra sticking into boob thing on my way to a BBQ with my boss, I very probably would have gone braless.

but that's kind of irrelevant, the thread has moved on

AWimbaWay · 21/09/2014 17:42

MiddletonPink, I didn't wear a bra ever, not once, until I got pregnant with my first child at the age of 30 (and I actually needed one for the first time). I would wear a lycra cropped top when exercising. Didn't realise I was offending so many people, in fact I'd be amazed if any one even noticed or cared if they did.

Tipsykisses · 21/09/2014 17:42

I do think it's a good idea to re post in relationships .

noddyholder · 21/09/2014 17:42

So she doesn't work for him she is just living there? Who supports her financially etc

CharlieSierra · 21/09/2014 17:45

because she has been threatening to tell me about them for a while and this is why she came attired as she did - to draw the attention of his wife and force the issue.

SweetsForMySweet · 21/09/2014 17:47

'You could see the outine of her boobs and nipples, if you looked'
'After the party I mentioned it to dh, he claimed not to have noticed.'

Grin You ask your dh if he saw that his female work colleague had no bra on and did he see her boobs and nipples (which you would see if you looked) and expected him to admit that he was looking at his colleagues boobs. Surely, no man would be stupid enough to fall into such a big trap admit that he had seen anything even if she was practically topless. I don't think you need to worry about her anyway op, she had her boyfriend with her, I doubt she's interested in your dh in that way.

diddl · 21/09/2014 17:48

You might have invited her, but she could have declined, or your husband could have told you that she couldmn't make it!

what a shock.

I wonder if he wanted to be found out?

BioSuisse · 21/09/2014 17:48

I don't know. I imagine DH is paying for her. Good question, i will ask him. She didn't appear poor to me, but i imagine she has made a living out of western men. I noticed her shoes were Louboutin.

OP posts:
maddy68 · 21/09/2014 17:49

Why would that be an issue? I sometimes don't wear a bra and I've git big boobs if the straps show! You are most definitely bu

BioSuisse · 21/09/2014 17:49

He says he is relieved it is all out in the open now.

OP posts:
spanky2 · 21/09/2014 17:50

I would be embarrassed and not want to look. But tbh you knew that she was sending a message to your husband and he read it by the sounds of it. What a sh*t. I can't believe they were able to brazen it out like that!

Tipsykisses · 21/09/2014 17:50

Well that needs stopping !

You know now so your husband has no need to keep financing her .

KatieKaye · 21/09/2014 17:51

Yes, talking to someone in RL sounds like a good idea - if not in person, then by telephone. You need your support system around you.

And tomorrow morning, go and see a lawyer.

Remember - this affair is not your fault.

spanky2 · 21/09/2014 17:51

Well at least he is feeling better! How selfish. What about you?

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