AIBU to my boyfriends cats

[Random1999]

Basically my boyfriend has 3 cats, all 3 go off for days on end (all female have had the snip so thats why they're allowed to), 2 of 3 are quite aggressive and scratch, bite and hiss at me. The longest theyve gone off is for a month we see them in the local woodland sometimes. I'm concerned because of what they might be bringing in, such as toxic plasmosis (which can cause miscarriage and im 15 weeks), they're semi wild as 2 of them were raised on the local farm and never indoors until now they only come in to eat and/or terrorise i cant stand them if im honest but put up with it until i caught pregnant now im asking my boyfriend to keep them out 24/7 and only bring them into the back porch for food at night i dont want them near me and FIL agrees its best.
my boyfriend however doesnt think its fair and is constantly throwing his toys out of his pram because of it yeah i know he loves them but seriously they've been seen licking slugs for christ sake and are always fighting with wild cats (lots of them around here) so who knows what they might have and pass on to me if they're around me all the time, AIBU? I might sound a bit precious but seriously theyre disgusting, they lick slugs, jump in the toilet for a drink and are always fighting with other strays and wild cats so who knows whats being passed around...

Cats are naturally clean though. Seems odd that they spend so long outdoors but still shit and piss on the cooker.

I can take the cats and find them a home if op is okay with that. I've pmd her.

Random I am pleased that your DP has come to his senses. I have 4 cats myself but they are lovely cuddly fluffballs that either poo/pee in their litter tray or outside (mostly outside) and they are lovely loving family pets.

No way could I cope with the hell that you have and be pregnant. How on earth would you manage when you have a demanding newborn? If all three need to be PTS than so be it because they sound bloody horrible.

Taking an elderly, probably unhomeable cat to the RSPCA is the very opposite of someone coming to their senses.

Tbh, I find it very hard to believe any cat, especially a feral one, would climb up above floor level to defecate on a cooker.

How does cat poo "escape" you, OP? Do you not smell it? How did you not smell the cat poo behind the fridge?

Your attitude regarding these cats disgusts me, and I do not think you clean up as much as you say you do....

I agree with you that this situation is not tolerable OP. I disagree with you that your DP is a good pet owner though, things should never have been allowed to get this bad, regardless of whether the pg was planned or not.

Pets messing all over the family home is no way for any children to be brought up. It is grim.

I hope you get sorted, and soon. And good luck with the baby!

*suburbanRhonda" Good call.

I have problems with my sense of smell yes, but usually do smell it. And if im not in the living room rather bedroom and kitchen but theyve fouled the living room no i do not smell it, Yes actually I do clean up all the bloody time there piss and shit is not left to fester unless im busy and unaware of it (due to it being in a separate room where I dont smell it) this thread was made for advice ive gotten some (very helpful!) advice so lets just leave it at that, my decision is made. thank you to all that commented.

Your decision is made, is it, OP?

Then I hope you and your DP also make the decision never to have any more pets, as it's clear that neither of you is cut out to care for them.

Haven't read the whole thread but I would suggest the first thing your boyfriend needs to do is worm, de-flea and toilet train his cats. And instigate a bit of routine, because they sound chaotic.

Actually I have pets that arent feral, house trained, clean, wormed, flead and friendly :) These 3 cats arent mine and arent my responsibility It was stupid of him to take in WILD cats, not domesticated. Yes he didnt try hard enough which is his own fault but its unfair to both to keep wild cats here when hes only capable of looking after domesticated animals. I want them to go to someone with a shed and other utilities so they CAN look after them but if the only other option is RSPCA so be it ive even said i'll be trying with the younger two and keeping them until november if theres no improvement then they'll have to go simple as!

The above is all very basic pet care stuff.

My decision is made the oldest will be rehomed either by someone with the utilities to look after her or sent to rspca where she is likely to be put down. if i cant handle the other two either they go too.

Only on MN would 3 feral cats' needs be put above a mother-to-be. They are feral they won't starve!

Quite frankly Random you deserve a medal the size of China for putting up with their disgusting rank behaviour for as long as you have. Get rid. Do not feel guilty.

Your decision...?!?

Nice.

Big cat lover here, but I think the OP is getting a very hard time. We had an indoor cat with digestive problems and the never ending clearing up was wearing and that was before DD. However she was lovely and snuggled up on a lap not semi-feral. It is very difficult to clean up if cats have been prolific in their toilet habits as if there is even a hint of a smell then they'll use the same spots and they do use toilet habits to help mark their territory.
Hopefully the OP will take up Sunflower's offer if she and her boyfriend don't have any luck rehoming before resorting to the RSPCA.
OP good luck, I'm guessing this isn't easy on either of you.

I think the OP is getting a hard time too.

I'm a cat lover, have 3 and one of them was really pretty violent when we got her, not trained in the slightest and didn't know her name (think she had been abused as missing teeth, gum disease, slit in her ear, missing whiskers) . It was a tough job but she's now the most lovely cat ever.

I would never have allowed a cat like that to be near a baby though, we've had some pretty awful cuts in the first couple of years and very unpredictable.

She now lives really happily with a 3yo and 1yo and she's lovely with them but I definitely couldn't have kept her if she had still been the way she was previously. Cats like the OP describes are dangerous.

Dont worry pp's im cruel and should never have pets ;) sunflower is quite a way from me (have spoken to her) so sunflower is my new last resort above rspca

I'm with Piper the only concerning bit is having semi feral cats around a newborn. I wouldn't want to have to worry about keeping the baby and cats separate all the time. The other stuff (toilet drinking etc) is just normal cat stuff.

out of nosiness interest, OP, what pets do you have and are they all now living in the same home with your DP and his cats?

I think thats irrelevant, sorry.

Hi OP the shed doesn't necessarily need to be expensive - I've seen loads on ebay (local to me anyway) that literally go for 99p - until I realise that part of the deal is that you as the buyer have to dismantle the thing, but still very much so a bargain for some graft

I hope if needs must you get something sorted with Sunflower.

Also your OH needs to get the cats sorted for fleas etc and checked out by a vet, they could be ill with something that leaves them incontinent, hence the wee/poo everywhere.

YABU.

Pets are a lifetime commitment and you clearly knew what the cats were like before making the choice to have a baby with your OH.

The risk of toxoplasmosis is negligible if you practice good hygiene. You are more likely to catch it from undercooked meat than cat mess. Use gloves and clean up cat mess immediately. I believe a toxoplasmosis risk isn't present until cat mess is over 24 hours old.

Once your baby is toddling he/she will be putting all kinds of germs into their mouth, I think you need to put some strategies in place to help cope with your fear before that stage.