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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think friends staying shouldn't have two twenty min showers a day

232 replies

suziepra · 10/08/2014 09:47

If got some friends staying and they keep having 40 wish mins of showering a day. A part from anything this can't be great for their skin but this is costing 1.60 a day in water with the meter and 1.40 in electric per person. Should I say something? Staying with for a week

OP posts:
SwedishEdith · 10/08/2014 11:59

Are they insisting on a clean towel after each shower as well Grin

DownByTheRiverside · 10/08/2014 12:00

Both DD and OH can shower happily for 20 minutes, it's the relaxation and the scrubbing that they enjoy. DS and I shower to get clean, but adore long baths.

scarletforya · 10/08/2014 12:02

They invited themselves?

Do you like them Op or are they a pair of freeloading users ?

WhereHas1999DissappearedToo · 10/08/2014 12:02

I would say something OP as it's costing an absolute fortune (I wouldn't mind it so much if it was v cheap) and they invited themselves.

HaremScarem · 10/08/2014 12:04

You NEED to tell them!! Ranting on here is pointless.

Go on you can do it.

fatlazymummy · 10/08/2014 12:07

I'm with you OP. No one needs to shower for that length of time. It's a luxury, and doing it in some one else's house is taking liberties .

DownByTheRiverside · 10/08/2014 12:09

They asked to extend their stay to a week and you agreed.
So deal with it, you need to say no next time, and accept that this is a situation you have created. You are going to have a dreadful time if you are this resentful all week, and they are unlikely to notice your seething.

almapudden · 10/08/2014 12:13

How the fuck does anyone spend 20 minutes in the shower? I wouldn't know what to do with myself!

NCOBVIOUSLY1542 · 10/08/2014 12:14

Alma you just kind of lather, rinse and repeat whilst singing along to the music (that's what I do anyway lol)

McFox · 10/08/2014 12:16

I'm just shocked that some people think a 20 minute shower is acceptable, never mind twice a day. In fact it makes me angry, especially when there are children being shown/taught that this ok. There's just no need, and I say this as someone with really long hair to wash.

Pobblewhohasnotoes · 10/08/2014 12:17

I'm a bit in disbelief that people have two showers a day? Is this normal? Unless you've been to the gym or you're particularly sweaty or have a grubby job why do you need two showers a day? To be clean whilst you sleep?

I personally am quite happy for my guests to shower but I can see how if you're on a water meter it may be a concern.

And actually you don't need to leave the water running whilst you clean teeth, it's incredible wasteful. I was always taught to turn the tap on only when I needed to.

fatlazymummy · 10/08/2014 12:18

almapudden I think some people shave and do beauty treatments in the shower, whereas other people just get washed and get out again.

backwardpossom · 10/08/2014 12:22

When I read your first post, I originally thought you were being unreasonable. But after reading the rest of the thread, I think YANBU and you should say something. I live north of the border and don't have a meter - our water rates are paid alongside the council tax. I would never have realised that you'd be on a meter if I were staying and I'd be mortified if I'd known I was causing such an expense to you. Please tell them, that's a lot of money whether you're well off or not.

But this: I put the heating on yesterday as they were cold

WTF? I live in the far north of Scotland and was outside all day yesterday without a coat on. It surely wasn't that cold in the south-west?! Tell them to put on a jumper. Wink

PopcornFrenzy · 10/08/2014 12:23

OP YANBU I also hate waste and due to being careful with our water/electric usage we have got our utility bills down to less than £90.

They are massively taking the piss and need to be told, I really don't think they should stay the week.

backwardpossom · 10/08/2014 12:24

The only time I've spent that long in the shower was when I had a raging hangover and the water running over my head as I sat on the shower tray was life-saving. Blush

DownByTheRiverside · 10/08/2014 12:26

I know, McFox, scandalous that childrena are taught that a shower can be a relaxing and destressing time. Too late now to change that in our situation.
Ah well, I'll have to offset it with our heating, car ownership and waste management achievements.

ithoughtofitfirst · 10/08/2014 12:27

I would say yabu.

But I recently had some family to stay with some absolutely bonkers behaviour/habits eg waking up at 11am, going into the bathroom together for an hour and then asking to be taken to my MILs (their aunt) every evening for food and staying til 11pm or midnight and wanting a lift home. Which thrilled me as I was pregnant, have a toddler and for half of their stay was organising ds's christening buffet.

Never been so glad to see the back of anyone.

WyrdByrd · 10/08/2014 12:38

I started off thinking you were BU and a bit obsessive, but having read the rest of your posts I'm thinking you may have a point.

Given that they've invited themselves at the last minute I think it would be perfectly reasonable to say something, maybe along the lines of:

"It's lovely having you here, but I'm still getting back on my feet after job issues last year & as the water is metered I'd really appreciate it if you could bear that in mind when showering. Morning & evening is ok but it would help if you could be a bit quicker".

McFox · 10/08/2014 12:41

DownByTheRiverside there are surely other ways of teaching your children to destress and relax that don't waste 100s of litres of water?

DownByTheRiverside · 10/08/2014 12:45

Probably.
We all have way that we can reduce, reuse and recycle and cut down on our carbon footprints, don't we? Most of us pick and choose what suits our lifestyles.
Mine usually shower for work in the mornings for around 4 minutes, but often have a longer shower when they come in from work having used public transport and walked a lot.

Original poster
suziepra · 10/08/2014 12:56

OK thanks everyone, going to say something. Going for a drive now, a friend wanted to drive so she is. But I was expected to contribute to fuel. I paid 5 for a trip, the journey usually costs me about 8 in fuel. Tempted to ask them to contribute to the water and energy costs...

OP posts:
Pobblewhohasnotoes · 10/08/2014 13:05

Oh my gosh, they're staying at your house as your guests and expected you to contribute to petrol?

Tiptops · 10/08/2014 13:05

I really don't think you should be a host if it makes you this uptight OP. Two 20 minute showers a day is far from excessive and it's not like it's forever is it?

backwardpossom · 10/08/2014 13:10

Oh dear, they asked you to contribute petrol money? Is this made up?! Grin

littlemissmaths · 10/08/2014 13:10

They sound like horrendous guests tbh Why are you letting them stay?

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