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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think friends staying shouldn't have two twenty min showers a day

232 replies

suziepra · 10/08/2014 09:47

If got some friends staying and they keep having 40 wish mins of showering a day. A part from anything this can't be great for their skin but this is costing 1.60 a day in water with the meter and 1.40 in electric per person. Should I say something? Staying with for a week

OP posts:
SirChenjin · 10/08/2014 10:21

Bloody hell - that is expensive Shock.

I presume your guests don't live in SW Ingerland? We live north of the border and don't have water meters so would have no idea that water costs so much - I'd be mortified and would far prefer that you said something to me.

SinglePringle · 10/08/2014 10:28

I love it when someone behaves in a way that is different to others and deems any way but their 'ridiculous'!
Seriously amuses me!

I spend 20 mins in the shower every day - wash and condition hair, shave legs as armpits, wash, rinse and then apply body oil.

I often have another shower in the evening / after I've been to the gym - don't shave during this one but will wash my hair if I've got really sweaty.

Wouldn't dream of curtailing a guests time in the shower.

HaremScarem · 10/08/2014 10:34

I think it is perfectly ok to mention it. If they are your friends they won't mind. It's the type of thing you could easily not think about. I usually have two showers a day.

I would just say something like...

I am sorry I forgot to mention it earlier but can you try to keep your showers and water use to a minimum as I am on 'green' drive. Its no problem if you want two showers a day but if you could make them quick I would appriciate it

I really believe that people should be less nervous about raising subjects that are bothering them. It might be a bit embarrassing for you to raise the issue but as long as you are polite then why not. You would mention it to a family member.

HaremScarem · 10/08/2014 10:35

You forgot about the cost of washing the towels.

SinglePringle · 10/08/2014 10:38

Harum if I were a guest and my host said that to me, I'd be mortified.

I'd feel so embarrassed and as if I were an imposition.

scarletforya · 10/08/2014 10:39

wheresthelight

Shock FORTY MINUTES!? Isn't your bill through the roof?!

londonrach · 10/08/2014 10:39

No idea you had to time people in the shower. Two showers a day in this hot weather is a good idea..

SirChenjin · 10/08/2014 10:39

I'd be mortified too - but I would respect their position and curtail my showering to a time that fitted their budget. What about you Single?

Pico2 · 10/08/2014 10:42

Are they from the SW? I'd have no idea that water was that expensive anywhere in the UK as it is no where near that expensive here.

Original poster
suziepra · 10/08/2014 10:42

And I'm not really timing anyone, I just need to go to the loo a lot and have noticed they were pretty long showers while I'm desperate for the lol.

I usually do have a 4 min shower, using the timer the water company provided and never leave the tap running while I'm cleaning my teeth.

OP posts:
Janethegirl · 10/08/2014 10:45

I'd consider 20 mins in shower as excessive. 5 mins is plenty, even including washing and conditioning long hair. I do not however think 2 showers a day are excessive in warm weather.

Twooter · 10/08/2014 10:46

Do they know you are metered?

Original poster
suziepra · 10/08/2014 10:46

They are not from the sw, I have said before that water is my most expensive bill. I just don't think it occur s that two showers long showers a day is excessive to them. If I lived up north with gas heated water and no water meter these showers would be more like 30p and not 300p

Maybe I'm just not cut out to host. They keep spraying perfume after every shower, I think I'm allergic to that and is giving me a bad throat but seems too weird to ask someone not to spray perfume but the whole house stinks of this nasty artificial stuff too.

OP posts:
Salmotrutta · 10/08/2014 10:47

I can completely understand you OP.

If I was budgeting and not wanting to find myself back in a situation where I was very short of money I would be pretty hacked off about someone racking up big water and energy bills too.

We are very lucky not to have metered water up here in Scotland - we have more than enough pouring out of the sky Hmm

Llareggub · 10/08/2014 10:50

Is there something about your house that is making them feel like they need a shower?

My mate has dogs and I hate the smell. I'd want to shower a lot.

arna · 10/08/2014 10:53

We stayed with friends who warned us that their hot water tank was small so that it would run out if we took a lengthy shower but that was the truth and it did!

ilovesooty · 10/08/2014 10:54

As by your own admission you're not short of money I think you have hit your own nail on the head - you're not cut out for hosting.

I personally wouldn't take two 20 minute showers a day but your attitude to and monitoring of someone's teeth cleaning indicates that you're feeling resentful of your guests and it might be better not to invite them again.

wheresthelight · 10/08/2014 10:58

Luckily we only have them EOW so it's not as awful as it sounds but luckily we live in an older house and we aren't metered. May feel differently if we were!

If it is bothering you so much then just have a quiet word and ask of they would mind having a bit shorter time as you are metered. Do you have a smart meter so you can show them the cost?

specialsubject · 10/08/2014 10:58

very entitled behaviour - 2 showers a day may be needed if people get sweaty but 20 minutes is a ridiculous time. I can do the whole hair wash and shave thing in 5 and I have long hair.

running the tap while tooth brushing is also waste for the sake of it. This is as bad as leaving litter everywhere, using plastic bags once etc etc.

hope they are leaving soon. And their stinky perfume.

Wigglykitten · 10/08/2014 11:00

I live in SW and have a water meter, and between us we average about 5 15 min showers a day, plus a zillion loo flushes and handwashes. Dishwasher and washing machine are on daily, sometimes twice. I have a mega deep bubble bath a few times a week too in addition to showers. We honestly don't scrimp on water at all and our bill is £50 per month which isn't too bad I don't think. It was £96 per month before we went onto the meter. We do turn off the tap while we're brushing our teeth though.

If it's bothering you that much then do what a friend of mine confessed to doing when she was in a similar situation. She fiddled with the thermostat and pretended her hot water was broken so they could only have cold showers!

Thenapoleonofcrime · 10/08/2014 11:00

I think as they are guests, you have to suck it up. For one week it is an expense but not a terrible one if you don't have money problems.

However everyone saying have 2 20 min showers a day- that would come in, by the OP's rough calculations at about £90 for two people- then you have the rest of the household to keep clean/washing/waste to pay for. If you live in the SW, then a bill of £2-300 is not unusual for a household- a month. All those 'I shower as much as I like'- fine if you have the budget but many people simply can't afford several hundred pounds a month on water and I don't think they should be derided for that (as our friends found out when they moved there they stopped flushing the loo after every single use as well!)

Original poster
suziepra · 10/08/2014 11:03

I didn't really invite them,they asked to stay the weekend. Then i had to rush home as they decided to come on Friday and they've asked yo extend it to a week here. I like having friends stay for the weekend now and again but a week is just too long for me.

The house has damp and they never open the window and leave the bathroom door open after they've finished so I've had to turn the dehumidifier on. Sorry I'm just ranting here..

OP posts:
Original poster
suziepra · 10/08/2014 11:06

How is your water so low kitten? Mine is 20 a month but its just me, I never have a bath and I only shower at home on the weekends, have a modern dishwasher and washing machine.

OP posts:
Cereal0ffender · 10/08/2014 11:08

They invited themselves? Tell them about the water then, they sound a bit usey

Original poster
suziepra · 10/08/2014 11:10

Its not particularly hot here, I put the heating on yesterday as they were cold. No animals here - house is very clean and no carpet with solid wood floors everywhere.

OP posts:
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