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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

AIBU: MNHQ's thoughts and what you can do

980 replies

RowanMumsnet · 24/07/2014 11:19

Hello there

We've seen a fair number of posts recently about AIBU, and specifically about whether there's a problem in terms of some posters being gratuitously aggressive, even if the posts aren't particularly guideline-breaking in any other way.

We've done some careful monitoring of AIBU over the last couple of weeks and... We agree. Quite a few threads in AIBU do seem to veer off into a pointlessly unpleasant direction with very little provocation.

So from now on, we're going be looking out for posters who seem to put the boot in a bit too readily, and we'll be dropping them "polite mails" asking them to draw their horns in a bit. (And then if they carry on, we'll take further action.)

We'll also remove the text from the header about AIBU not being a fight club, because it's possible that this was (perversely) prompting people to think it was a fight club.

We'd really, really like to enlist your help in making AIBU a more pleasant and constructive place to post.

First off, please don't feel you have wait for an MNHQ response: the MN forums are what you, collectively, make of them, and you can set the tone. If you think an OP is being rounded on, go on and post - and say (without making personal attacks) if you think other posts have crossed a line in terms of meanness or aggression. (Feel free to refer posters back to this thread!)

But also, please report. Not necessarily because you think a post is deletable, but if you think a poster could do with getting one of our polite mails.

To be completely clear: AIBU is exactly the same as all the other topics on Mumsnet, and the same rules apply. Ideally, we want MN to be a place where people can discuss, share, entertain each other, and seek advice and support. It's not a place for posters to take lumps out of each other for no reason, and with no intention of offering constructive/interesting/funny input.

Thanks,
MNHQ

OP posts:
Thread gallery
10
Sparklingbrook · 25/07/2014 17:26

MrsV I sometimes think i have a rubbish sense of humour on MN, everyone is hooting with laughter and I am all 'What, what? I don't get it'. Blush

Thread taxidermy Beer? Grin

LineRunner · 25/07/2014 17:30

The other reason I don't like Classics is that I say stuff on Chat knowing it'll disappear, and then suddenly it doesn't because it's been embalmed for all time. And reporting one's own posts to get them deleted is a bit wanky.

Inabagdown · 25/07/2014 17:32

I like Thumbs idea.

I think Maryz has a point about "pages". If people were "educated" about customise, it might help a lot.

MrsVamos · 25/07/2014 17:37

Some days I am baffled too, Sparks.

I guess it depends what tickles you.

I am trying with my thread, but its hard.

Already been told off for not realising some people don't want to have a giggle.

Perhaps my title wasn't explanatory enough ?

AllMimsyWereTheBorogoves · 25/07/2014 17:37

Why can't it just be the default option that:

(a) there are no pages

(b) the OP's posts are highlighted so you can see if there's been an update

(c) your own posts are highlighted.

It strikes me as odd that you have to opt into having all of the above given how useful they are.

Hugelyouted · 25/07/2014 17:41

Nothing kills a great thread faster than going to the thread hall of fame, otherwise known as classics.
Keep a nominated thread where it is for 90 days, then stick in classics.

Maryz · 25/07/2014 17:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HotPinkWeaselWearingLederhosen · 25/07/2014 17:45

SneezeCake you said you generalised and Fanjo made it personal. I don't think you generalised by saying YOU were on threads were YOU were attacked. You then said you didn't generalise. Then you said you generalised and made personal comments. I can't help but find that contradictory.

What I did not do, contrary to your implication was attack, misconstrue or twist your words. I took them in the context they were written.

You've now since called yourself fumble fingered and it seems you magically expect people to know you mean something entirely different Confused

Also, I'm not terribly impressed with you thinking from one sentence I made I'm an example of the people you say have an agenda and are not nice. You have referred to me as one of those people. Sad thanks for that.

Hugelyouted · 25/07/2014 17:45

Or have a section for Weird /Mystery /Scary /Conspiracy Shit-
A personal fave

And a klaxon which alerts unashamed voyeurs like me to the latest bunfight

Sparklingbrook · 25/07/2014 17:46

I thought those sliders would have been good for bunfight alerts.

MrsKwazii · 25/07/2014 17:48

Aren't sliders an ice-cream sandwich. Mmmm

AllMimsyWereTheBorogoves · 25/07/2014 17:48

Bunfight klaxon! Oh yes please. I've found an image they could work from for the emoticon.

AIBU: MNHQ's thoughts and what you can do
Hugelyouted · 25/07/2014 17:52

Like this

AIBU: MNHQ's thoughts and what you can do
Inabagdown · 25/07/2014 17:52
AllMimsyWereTheBorogoves · 25/07/2014 17:53

I like Hugelyouted's too!

Hugelyouted · 25/07/2014 17:55

Think yours is easier to transfer into an emoticon mimsy!

Maryz · 25/07/2014 17:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hugelyouted · 25/07/2014 17:58

A wooden spoon emoticon when people are just generally shit stirring.

MrsKwazii · 25/07/2014 18:02

Looks more like 'bumfight' on that fella's knuckles Grin

Hugelyouted · 25/07/2014 18:04

Oh well that'll be something for the Friday night thread then, mrskwazil
Wink

ginslinger · 25/07/2014 18:06

I'm seriously considering a tattoo

MrsKwazii · 25/07/2014 18:07

GrinHugely An emoticon for everyone!

Jux · 25/07/2014 18:10

Automatically highlighting OP's posts is a great idea; I did it when MN first made it available, but that was because they posted a thread about it. New people don't know it's there, or just want to get to posting asap, rather than poking around the site seeing what things are available. Very few people have profiles these days for the same reasons, I think.

OhILoveAGoodNameChange · 25/07/2014 18:26

i would really like to see a quote option so its obvious if posters are actually posting what someone has said, or changing the words but still attributing them to a poster.

also I have just apologised on a thread for swearing. it would be good to mark the posts as 'the poster apologises for this post'. maybe that overly complex.

Hugelyouted · 25/07/2014 18:31

Perhaps an arse kissing emoticon for those at least bi annual love in threads where people nominate their fave poster?

Swipe left for the next trending thread