AIBU: MNHQ's thoughts and what you can do

[RowanMumsnet]

Hello there

We've seen a fair number of posts recently about AIBU, and specifically about whether there's a problem in terms of some posters being gratuitously aggressive, even if the posts aren't particularly guideline-breaking in any other way.

We've done some careful monitoring of AIBU over the last couple of weeks and... We agree. Quite a few threads in AIBU do seem to veer off into a pointlessly unpleasant direction with very little provocation.

So from now on, we're going be looking out for posters who seem to put the boot in a bit too readily, and we'll be dropping them "polite mails" asking them to draw their horns in a bit. (And then if they carry on, we'll take further action.)

We'll also remove the text from the header about AIBU not being a fight club, because it's possible that this was (perversely) prompting people to think it was a fight club.

We'd really, really like to enlist your help in making AIBU a more pleasant and constructive place to post.

First off, please don't feel you have wait for an MNHQ response: the MN forums are what you, collectively, make of them, and you can set the tone. If you think an OP is being rounded on, go on and post - and say (without making personal attacks) if you think other posts have crossed a line in terms of meanness or aggression. (Feel free to refer posters back to this thread!)

But also, please report. Not necessarily because you think a post is deletable, but if you think a poster could do with getting one of our polite mails.

To be completely clear: AIBU is exactly the same as all the other topics on Mumsnet, and the same rules apply. Ideally, we want MN to be a place where people can discuss, share, entertain each other, and seek advice and support. It's not a place for posters to take lumps out of each other for no reason, and with no intention of offering constructive/interesting/funny input.

Thanks,
MNHQ

Garlic; yes you're right & thankfully the posters who think it's big & clever to use the C word are few & far between.

Good plan. Off to read thread properly.

Cunt is a perfectly reasonable word .
It's not big and clever - certainly no more so than being snide and superior about not using it. Not using it is a choice bit being sanctimonious is just a pain on the arse.

It's just a word . No more powerful than that.
Although I prefer twat but there you go.

i think i would prefer it if they werent in subject lines iywkim = means no one can leave a laptop open ever

I swear like a trooper but as kids get older...

But, if people are posting on AIBU for traffic, doesn't that just decrease traffic on the other boards? If people had to choose a board to post on then it would increase the traffic of those boards. You can always bump a thread, it's not frowned upon here.

I think it might be worth trying deactivating it and seeing whether people really miss it or find there is a hole that it no longer fills.

Sorry QQ - is GF on this thread = goady fucker instead of SWMNBN?

I may have to start again from teh beginning if so

Otherwise - good idea Rowan (serial namechanger as you can see )

Twat is better to say out loud. Cunt works better sewn into a sampler.

I'm sure there never used to be swearing in thread titles. Lots in threads, but not in titles. Because I posted a thread about spilling marmite on the carpet entitled "Shiiiiit" and then felt really embarrassed about it and hoped it would just disappear quietly (I think it did).

AGree a week without AIBU
the place won't collapse

i just hide the sweary title ones without reading them

yes - ALtho it wasnt my cuppa tea.
still they just get zapped. My kids can read.

I actually wet my pants in shock when I see a sweary title.

I actually wet my pants in shock when I see a sweary title.

Twice. It is so upsetting.

Where's the fun gone? Somebody bring back having a laugh on MN before it's too late FGS.

agree. So much has changed.

come to twitter, its funner