to wibu to ask the doctor to give me something?

[extremepie]

Bf and I broke up yesterday as I found out he had cheated on me :(

Feel like my heart has been ripped out and emotionally I am a wreck, crying most of the day etc.

At the moment though what is really affecting me is the physical things, I feel so sick, like a have a lead weight in my stomach which is making me not eat, which is making me feel more sick etc. In the last 24 hours I have had about 10 spoonfuls of soup and half a yogurt, I honestly could not force down any more than that, tried to eat a banana took one bite and almost threw up!

My whole body is shaking, especially my hands, probably from the hunger and my chest aches like I've been punched. Have extremely bad headaches from all the crying and I got about 3 hours sleep last night!

Now I know that the only thing that can really heal me is time and I just have to wait for it to pass so to speak but can I ask the doctor to give me anything to help with the physical stuff in the meantime? I was planning to see the doctor anyway to get a check up for sti's etc so thought maybe I should ask while I was there?

Honestly feel like I wouldn't feel quite so shitty if I could get some rest but at the moment I cant :(Part of the reason I couldn't sleep last night was because my stomach hurt so much :(

I don't want to take anti-depressants because I know this is only temporary and it will pass but if I asked for sleeping tablets or something to help the nausea would they give it to me? I know there's no pill for a broken heart sadly but I'm worried I won't be able to look after the kids for long in the state I'm in I can hardly stand up straight :(

FFS!

I've read the whole fucking sorry thread thank you.

I was the wine and fags comment early on. I suggest you RTFT before getting judgemental of others.

Oops you meant other threads?

Well hey, we can't all be so genned up on every poster.

And I say again, this is AIBU.

What a really fucking horrible thread

I hope the OP is OK

Please just try to eat! Hopefully that will eventually try put things into perspective. Easier said than done, but don't let someone's actions define who you are.

What a nasty thread.

I don't think people like the OP are responsible for the crisis in the NHS. However, the one-size-fits-all, trigger-happy diagnosis going on here is exactly why General Practice is in turmoil :)

Of course the OP will have to process what's happened like anyone else in her circumstances. That doesn't mean that help is inappropriate - a mental health episode is often triggered by circumstances! We don't know what the lead-up has been and even if we did know, we're not qualified to judge if the circumstances justify intervention. Mental health doesn't work that way. Pulling yourself together can be too tall an order and the person with the pills should recognise this.

This is one of the times that I feel the appropriate term for a gathering of women should be a 'bully'. Almost makes me wish I had a penis...

The GP on this thread is just awful. I have a lot of close family who are GPs and going through the stresses of cutbacks etc., and they would never speak about OP like this (I have asked them). There is still time to feel compassion even if there is not always enough time to show this because of the pressure of work. It's the GP's true feelings coming through here. Worrying.

FFS nobody is saying that break ups cannot trigger off mental ill health but 24 hours of distress does not make a person mentally unwell.

It later transpired that the OP has a massive backstory and other continued to attack macdoodle and others for not remembering. I had not even seen a post from the OP before and apparently that means I lack empathy. Fucking bonkers.

myfairyking: '24 hours of distress does not make a person mentally unwell.' Depends on the person. If there is already emotional fragility - something none of us remembered/knew about at the start of the thread - it may well be appropriate to manage the situation via some form of monitoring/medical intervention within that time frame.

Whether or not macdoodle knew the OP's backstory or not, her response lacked awareness that there are always of range appropriate responses to mental illness in the context of patients' ever-different life circumstances. Had she been aware of this, she would not have attempted to defend an indefensible position - i.e., that it would be inappropriate for OP to seek medical intervention, based on a cursory knowledge of her present situation. The absence of a backstory and clinical notes should really have prevented her from speaking 'as a doctor'; it was unprofessional. But since she did, and also showed a very short-tempered, judgemental and arrogant approach at the same time, it can be no great surprise to find that nobody on this thread would choose to be treated by her.

I think a number of people said they would choose to be treated by me and have emailed me as well, my 3 week waiting time would bear that out as well. However there are certainly some arrogant rude and frankly ill informed demanding people on this thread I would not be very grateful to have as my patients.

Then you need to read again because selective reading doesn't help anybody. People were supporting macdoodle.

...her response lacked awareness that there are always a range of appropriate responses to mental illness...

Without the back story (which was not mentioned or linked to AT ALL by the op) we are still talking about ONE days upset following a break up. FFS how on earth is that a mental illness. Please show me where that is in the DSM. So bloody insulting to those who actually suffer a mental illness.

Also, no it does not depend on the person. You cannot dx a MH condition based on emotional vulnerabilities and 24 hours of distress. It's different if that person already has a diagnosis.

I suppose I should have not expected any less out of MNers who love to play armchair doctor and pretend they know more than they do.

I'm sure there are, macdoodle! Imagine if you saw us in your waiting room in the morning :) I do think you went in pretty harsh and got some backs up. I also think that out of respect for your profession, you shouldn't give idle opinions on half the facts unless you're going to keep it quiet that you're a doctor.

As it turned out, the OP was in a very bad way and had been trying to articulate that in the only way she could manage. She is now/about to be being seen by a crisis team with very good reason. Reaching out for that help was very difficult for her, particularly because she had been spoken to in an impatient, shaming manner on this thread. Without blaming anyone on this thread - there were lots of factors at work - I think this has been one to pull a veil over and learn some lessons from.

Sorry AIBU on mumsnet is not the place to reach out for help. But there we go I am glad she is getting help. I think there are some ridiculous resentful doctor hating harridans on here and I have been around MN for many years.

No, but it's what she did and it shouldn't have been akin to being thrown to the wolves. You said some people supported you - great. Others didn't, but that doesn't mean they are 'ridiculous resentful doctor hating harridans'.... Most people expect compassion from a GP, that's all it comes down to I think. When they don't get it, they're hurt and alarmed - not hating or ridiculous - though ridiculous is a term I have a long and reluctant association with, so I'll accept that part of it as a good will gesture :) Night!

Myfairyking: Leaving aside your unpleasant comment, I will make the point again: Nobody is suggesting that a mental illness could or should be diagnosed on the basis of emotional fragilities and 24 hours of upset. However, medical intervention is often appropriate for patients who, despite not having a diagnosis (yet!) are still having difficulty coping. Medication is only one option available to the GP in such a situation. I agree that the response is different again if this was a patient with a known condition, the management of which would be an ongoing process (and probably dictated to the GP by the psychiatrist. There are also situations where a seemingly manageable trauma blows up into something much bigger for a patient. That might be the moment that raises a question about the possibility of a diagnosis being needed. But it can be missed so easily by doctors who are so sure they're correct that they refuse to listen.

Unpleasant? Just because I think it's wrong for people on the internet to diagnose. Someone suggested Anorexia for crying out loud! Again, you're not listening, I never said that people who are struggling should not be supported. In the original post, she gave no indication of having other life stressors. Can't make that any clearer!

My beef is with people armchair diagnosing and suggesting benzodiazepines when they have no medical knowledge.

Anyway, no point in engaging with this anymore. OP is clearly having a hard time which wasn't made clear at the start of the thread - not blaming her in any way - it is what it is. Why drag this on and on? I'm out.

Extremepie I wish you all the best of luck and hope you are now receiving some RL support.

Op, I've been through similar to you in regards to having a lying, cheating waste of space boyfriend and struggling a lot after the break up.

I also have disabled children and I know a lot of the reason he was so awful was because of my children.

But that was HIS failing, not my children's.

He had children of his own who he rarely bothered with so why on earth would he be any good with mine?

Unfortunately in my case I wasted three years of my life with him. He was emotionally abusive to me and at times physically and made me feel worthless.

I was so downtrodden that I actually believed my life was awful without him. I felt so lonely and so afraid.

I didn't take any pills as it's my belief that they only block pain that you are one day going to have to face anyway.

I need you to know that you WILL get through this.

I'd recently moved when my ex and I split up and knew nobody in the area and had nobody to talk to. It was due to him that I knew nobody, his extreme jealousy and his bullying of me left it impossible for me to meet new people.

It's been nearly a year now since we split. In that time I've got a new job that I love, I've made friends in the area and I've experienced lots of new things I'd never have tried before if I was still with him.

My children are so much happier too and doing really well now he's gone.

I can honestly say that I'm 100% happy. In fact I'm enjoying my life right now so much that I've decided to remain single and just focus on myself and my children.

It will take time op, but you'll come through the other side. Plus he HAS done you a favour. At least you won't waste anymore of your time and energy on someone who isn't worth it.

This is MN at it's finest, a random post in AIBU about a boyfriend breakup and people concluding anorexia, suicide, suggesting a need for barbiturates, and those who diasgree are manner or monster.

Only on MN.

I'd see mac any day.

Another vote for mac here.

Good luck op