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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to shout at this bloody child..

437 replies

Wilberforce2 · 24/06/2014 21:20

Not sure if I'm being a bit precious but this is driving me mental.

Every Tuesday my ds does rugby 4-5 and as they are only reception and year 1 all of the parents stay. I like staying and enjoy watching him but one of the little girls of another parent is doing my head in. I have a 4 month old dd and every week this little girl does not leave her alone, constantly plays with the hood on the pram (pushing it backwards and forwards), putting her fingers in the babies mouth, kissing her on the lips, takes her toys/muslin off of her, pokes her eyes it just goes on and on. Last week this girl had a heavy cold and was constantly wiping snot around her face then walked over to dd in her pram (I dared to take my eyes off of her for a second) and stuck her fingers in her mouth, Friday my dd gets an awful cold. The mum just laughs and says "oh she is so motherly" or "she just loves babies" but I want her to tell her to leave her alone for one fricking second. Today I told the girl no a few times and had a couple of looks from the mum who then said "oh *** come over here darling I don't think you are wanted" but I can't just watch her prod and poke her for an hour, she was trying to put a pine cone in her mouth then whipped her with a muslin!

Am I being precious or would you keep telling the girl no? Little girl is 2 years old. Older brother is in my ds's class so I don't want to cause an argument.

OP posts:
MrsBungle · 25/06/2014 00:29

Well it's not the 2 year old toddlers fault. Speak to the mum and ask her to keep her away from your baby. Or sit away from them. I don't see what's hard about that. Getting wound up by a toddler doing natural toddler things shoukd be directed at the parent rather than thinking you'd like to shout at the child.

SqutterNutBaush · 25/06/2014 00:31

YANBU!!

I get this in the playground (albeit with older children) and constantly saying "minisqutter doesnt really want to play that game", "minisqutter doesnt like to eat flowers" or "minisqutter is fine with me holding the pram thanks". It gets a bit tiring and tbh what i really want to say is "minisqutter is a person not a plaything who is entitled to personal space just like everyone so piss off!!" but i wouldnt do it :o

zzzzz · 25/06/2014 00:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

missbishi · 25/06/2014 00:47

Please don't mock a little baby o.p hence snot bubbles comment. In doing that you are being very very unreasonable.

It wasn't the little baby who had the snot bubbles, it was the toddler...

YANBU

ILoveCoreyHaim · 25/06/2014 01:25

I've got 3 dds and no way would I let them pester someone like this. Its rude, You should be able to watch your son without having to constantly watch what someone else's kid's doing.

Excuse me can you get your DD as she has a cold and I don't want xx coming down with one

Excuse me xx is poking my babies eyes and hurting her, can you shout of her please

Excuse me, xxx us waking he baby and she is not well today and I want to watch DS play rugby but can't if she makes her cry. Can you get her thanks

She will eventually get the message

ZacharyQuack · 25/06/2014 01:28

Lean down to the little girl and say quietly "Your mummy has got sweeties and biscuits for you".

Delphiniumsblue · 25/06/2014 07:10

Probably better to feed her with sweets and biscuits yourself and then the mother might remove her! Grin

InSpaceNooneCanHearYouScream · 25/06/2014 07:25

I can't believe all the people saying 'she's only 2 ffs'.
Oh fine, so then she must be allowed to do exactly what she likes? Crap! My 2 year olds would NOT have fiddled with someone's else's baby, as soon as they started I would firmly teach them to look but don't touch. If they persisted I would take them away and sit somewhere else. OP you are not being unreasonable. Tell the sappy mum to keep her kid under control.

pluCaChange · 25/06/2014 07:54

Whipping with a muslin? Poking in the eyes? Taking toys away? Feeding pine cones and snotty fingers?

Is your baby as afraid of confrontation as you? Why is your DD not screaming her head off at this outrageous interference? Why are you not? Get the kid to leave your DD alone!

Mrsjayy · 25/06/2014 08:19

Just tell her to leave the baby do it so her pare nt can here it is ok to tell her off gentely dont shout at a little girl,

Mrsjayy · 25/06/2014 08:19

Hear

Pimmsoclocknow · 25/06/2014 08:23

My four year old dd does rugby

KirjavaTheCat · 25/06/2014 08:37

I always assume that if a parent has allowed their small child to wander off out of sight and become attached to me, they mustn't mind me telling them off if they're behaving badly.

In my opinion you lose your right to be outraged at someone for daring to tell your little darling off, if you're using them as free childcare whilst you relax and have a nice chat.

Mrsjayy · 25/06/2014 08:40

Is the little girlwrestling the pram from you I dont understand how she is pushing the pram,

ThrowAChickenInTheAir · 25/06/2014 08:53

Good point Kirjava Grin

The problem is the mum in this. Don't be too concerned about giving her the hump. Sooner or later someone else will be saying the same thing to her if she can't keep an eye on what her dd is up to.

HappyAgainOneDay · 25/06/2014 09:17

The OP has to act quickly if she wants to stop snot being fingered into her baby's mouth. It would take time to get the mother to do something about it and, by the time she does, it will be too late and the OP's baby will be too full of snot to digest her next meal.

Please may we have an emoticon displaying disgust?

HazelBite · 25/06/2014 09:36

OP I feel your pain, when my twin sons were babies/in the double buggy, being identical, they were a source of fascination to both adults and small children. The adults were more "restrained" in their attentions but not so the small children. I was a bit of a wimp and used to say "I think yourMummy is calling you!" however their older brother (aged 3 at the time) used to straddle himself across the double buggy, over the twins and shout "Leave our babies alone!"
No-one used to argue with a cross 3 year old Grin

Original poster
Wilberforce2 · 25/06/2014 10:04

Thanks everyone.

I didn't say she was pushing the pram I said she constantly pushes the hood backwards and forwards, she pushes it back I say no and push it forwards and she pushes it back this goes in the whole time we are waiting for the teacher to open the door in the morning.

This morning we were waiting for the teacher to come out, little girl was pushing the hood of the pram I was saying no, she was putting her hands over the babies face and near her mouth so more no from me and asking her to go see her Mummy (who was only a few feet away) and then while I was giving my little boy a kiss goodbye she lent in and pinched the babies face so hard the baby screamed. I said loudly "no don't do that, that's not nice" then the Mum came over picked up the child told her to say sorry to hysterical dd little girl said no do Mum put her down looked at me and said "sorry, kids eh" then walked off!

If she comes near her at pick up I'm going to ask the mum to keep her away, this morning was horrible I'm not going to carry on having my dd poked and hurt.

OP posts:
pluCaChange · 25/06/2014 10:17

Good for you! Parents of in-your-face children need to helicopter and reinforce! I say that as mother of DC1, who's quite physical and needs monitoring!

VampyreofTimeandMemory · 25/06/2014 10:23

It wasn't the little baby who had the snot bubbles, it was the toddler...

so it's alright to mock a toddler? OP, I wonder how you would feel if a bunch of people were saying this shit about YOUR baby one day?

I can't believe the first person who you felt like shouting at was the child, rather than the mother. I think that's weird. Your child may behave similarly one day.

VampyreofTimeandMemory · 25/06/2014 10:25

just to clarify, of course yanbu to not want your baby poked and hurt but yabvu to start a bitchfest about a 2yo.

CeliaFate · 25/06/2014 10:32

I think the person who needs to be told is the little girl's mother.
The 2 y.o. is only being naturally curious with a younger child.
The mother on the other hand is letting her dd wander over to you so you have to parent the 2 y.o. as well as your own.
It's lazy parenting to assume you don't mind, but some people are happy to sit there watching other people parent their kids.
Can you leave the baby with someone this afternoon and say to the mum that the baby has a mark on her cheek, so could she stop her child going so close?

Bunnyjo · 25/06/2014 10:44

OP, YABU. The title and your subsequent description of the 2yr old child are just plain unpleasant. She is a toddler and not being deliberately horrible to your DD.

However, if you had said your title had been "to want to shout at this bloody mother" and your focus more on the lack of supervision rather than the toddler, then I'd be more inclined to agree with you.

Your problem is with the mother who isn't supervising her DD, not the child who is doing what many 2 year-olds do!

Poppet1974 · 25/06/2014 10:47

That's bloody disgraceful, she comes near you or your baby today or any other day be blunt and tell her to go back to her mum immediately and gesture to the mum to take her away! !!
I'm furious on your behalf!!
The nerve of some people ( and before anyone gets on their high horse, I'm talking about the mum)

Original poster
Wilberforce2 · 25/06/2014 10:56

Ok maybe the title was wrong but not sure what you mean by my subsequent description of the child as I have just written down what she does to the baby? I haven't slated the child or called her names..

I have felt like shouting at her but I wouldn't, haven't you ever felt like shouting at an annoying child? I appreciate it's the mum I need to be angry with and trust me I am but I also feel like telling the child to just go away but again that's how I feel I wouldn't actually shout it at her.

OP posts: