Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder if a lot of people who are Christians have had a rather nice life?

292 replies

stilllivingbythesea14 · 02/05/2014 22:33

I know I phrased that clumsily but I know a few Christians. They are nice people but very devout and pretty much always have been.

They are all white, middle class, privately educated, university graduates, plenty of money, nice jobs, one SAHM.

It must be easier to have faith in God if you've had a nice life? Hmm

I'd like to believe but I'm not sure I can.

OP posts:
TucsonGirl · 02/05/2014 22:34

I think it's a combination of having a nice life makes it easier to have faith in God, and generally following the basic tenets of Christianity making it easier to have a nice life.

Annunziata · 02/05/2014 22:35

YABU, everyone has their problems.

Original poster
stilllivingbythesea14 · 02/05/2014 22:36

I see what you mean :)

I was going to say a lot of the advantages were class based/financial but I suppose they also have stable family units and so on.

OP posts:
Original poster
stilllivingbythesea14 · 02/05/2014 22:37

Oh yeah of course but just the same the people I am thinking of have stability and security which tbh would do me just now!

OP posts:
CheeryName · 02/05/2014 22:37

Actually most christians I know well have had fairly
Shitty things happen in their life. But you would have to know them well so it could appear differently to someone on the outside as it were.

Falconi · 02/05/2014 22:37

The most devout Christians I know are very hard working in low levels jobs and go through all challenges you can imagine in life. But they are always happy and hopeful, their willingness to help is astonishing.

FourEyesGood · 02/05/2014 22:40

I'm an atheist. Middle-class, white, university-educated, never experienced genuine suffering.

My neighbour is Christian. She's black and from a working-class background and has suffered loss and hardships in her life.

I'm not sure that your acquaintances or my data are enough to form a clear picture. I know where you're coming from, but many people who have a strong faith have lived extremely hard lives.

Annunziata · 02/05/2014 22:43

Stability doesn't buy you happiness.

I scare most people off because I am religious, but I've never needed to worry about my house or the bills.

Original poster
stilllivingbythesea14 · 02/05/2014 22:43

They have yes, although IME they tend to come to religion after (because?) of these sufferings, I became very religious for 4 years after a bereavement but I lost my faith.

OP posts:
Iyatoda38 · 02/05/2014 22:45

I tend to think it is the opposite actually. Most poor countries have very devout Christians and the richer countries tend to be more unbelieving.
Within the UK most people in the churches I have attended had difficult lives. Although there were a few well of people in the church. I think money tends to make you feel self sufficient.
I also agree with Tuscongirl that following the basic tenets of Christianity alone can make life easier. I

skinnyflatwhitetogo · 02/05/2014 22:46

YABVVU.

I am a Christian. I am white, middle class, privately educated, university degree, good job....which I have recently resigned from due to stress. I am coping with anxiety, grief and a number of other issues which have all contributed to mental health issues. I feel dreadful guilt every day for my DP and DS who also cope with this. At the same time I function as normal like lots of others in the same position....

But I still believe in God...and it has never entered my head at any stage in my life that being a Christian has anything to do with how 'nice' my life is. Or how 'not nice' my life is.

I think you are massively oversimplifying with your thread title. It's quite offensive really.

knickernicker · 02/05/2014 22:46

Throughout my teenage years I went to a Pentecostal church. Many people with difficult lives joined, particularly at the time of the Billy Graham crusades here in the 80s.
Thru Facebook I've been able to see which of them hgasver maintained their faith. Nearly all of the children of the christian families have maintained and strengthened their beliefs. Many of the converts with difficult lives have stayed in the church too. There were several adopted children. None other f them have kept it up.

Pinkandpurplehairedlady · 02/05/2014 22:48

I'm Christian and I've had a pretty rough life. Having faith doesn't stop bad things happening but for me it has meant that I've got through in one piece.

NCISaddict · 02/05/2014 22:49

My parents were very devout Christians and both came from very poor backgrounds and had very tough lives, they had been Christians all their lives as were their parents. They were white but there wasn't much they could do to change that.

I don't know any of the members of their church who are well off or privately educated.

Purely on the basis of my personal experience YABU

hedgemoo · 02/05/2014 22:49

Been lurking for a while on this board but felt I had to post on this.

I think a lot of visible Christians, such a people who run churches, work in Christian organisations etc can often seem like that. I used to think so before I became a Christian. But actually the more you scratch the surface the more you find people in churches who've not had a nice life. Not all are live long Christians from devout families. Some are poor. Some are abuse survivors. Some have messed up careers or relationships. Personally my life has had its very un nice moments.

Mind you, I also find middle class people with apparently nice lives generally have plenty of skeletons in the cupboard whether they are Christian or not.

Original poster
stilllivingbythesea14 · 02/05/2014 22:49

I really don't see what's to be offended by with wondering to be honest although obviously I regret it if you have been offended by my thread title I honestly feel it's an overreaction.

I don't know ... I suppose I think it's easier to have a faith if you've got loads to be thankful for.

OP posts:
Annunziata · 02/05/2014 22:52

Why? Why would you hope and work to get into heaven when you've got everything you want here?

Iyatoda38 · 02/05/2014 22:55

I don't know about easier, but the bible does say it will be easier for a donkey to get through the eye of a needle than a rich man to be saved. Of course this does'nt apply to all rich people.
I do know from experience that people get closer to God or find him when they have been stripped of everything

Original poster
stilllivingbythesea14 · 02/05/2014 22:56

I suppose because as a Christian you praise God and thank Him a lot?

OP posts:
skinnyflatwhitetogo · 02/05/2014 22:56

I wasn't personally offended, but honestly, to wonder if 'a lot of people who are Christians have had a rather nice life' is just plain naive. On re-reading your post, I assume you are basing your views on your knowledge of just three or four Christians? Because honestly, its just not a balanced view, IMO. (I'm not a devout Christian or easily offended).

manicinsomniac · 02/05/2014 22:57

I think YABU

I know many Christians who fit your description. And many more who don't. On balance I think the groups are about even. Christians (and probably all other religions) come from all walks of life and all levels of health, wealth and happiness.

Anecdotal I know but strong Christians I know include the following:

  • family whose daughter died aged 5 from a heart condition
  • family with 4 boys all with ADHD, ASD and/or EBD
  • single lady with depression, emigrated to UK to try and provide for her disabled mother and sister. Earning NMW and sending half of it back home.
  • lady who lost both her parents before she was 10 years old
  • countless people who have lost husbands, wives, parents, children or close friends to cancer
  • many people who don't know how they're going to manage financially from one month to the next.
  • several with a variety of mental health conditions incl depression, bipolar, self harm, eating disorders and schizophrenia

My Dad died when I was quite young. Many friends assumed that I would lose my faith after that. I remember saying:
'if I believed in God when countless children starved to death in Africa or were killed by a Tsunami or when whole countries were decimated by war then how can I stop believing in him just because one person that I love dies too?'

Alambil · 02/05/2014 22:58

I think it's harder actually.

Our friends in Africa are FAR more faithful and real in their beliefs, every single day. They're thankful to God for everything - living past 40, having healthy children, sending them all to school and further education, having jobs and money coming in - every little thing in their lives is provided for by God (they believe). Their answer for anything is "Pray - God will provide" and so far, he has...

It's far harder for Christians here where you have to almost consciously remember to be thankful and faithful

Iyatoda38 · 02/05/2014 22:58

I know a Christian couple who seem to have it all. They are so nice and very dedicated to their faith. I do admire them and wish I could be more involved in the church as I was when I was single and struggling.

Original poster
stilllivingbythesea14 · 02/05/2014 22:59

Quite a lot more than three or four! I was in the Christian Union at university, went to Spring Harvest, went to church for years, plus the few I know now. Most fit the bracket I described in my OP, especially those raised in Christian households. In my experience those who find religion later in life sometimes have more troubled backgrounds.

OP posts:
Annunziata · 02/05/2014 23:00

But He isn't there to give us 'things'. God exists to love us, not to give us a house and a car and pretty face.

Swipe left for the next trending thread