To wonder why people are so often against co sleeping?

[pigluscious]

Maybe I'm a silly lentil weaving hippy, but I really don't understand why people are so obsessed with getting little babies to sleep on their own, and to settle themselves. What on earth is wrong with rocking/feeding to sleep and then tucking your child in (following all the safety advice) next to you?
AIBU?

www.amazon.de/gp/aw/d/B009WQFONG/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?qid=1398702136&sr=8-1

And I think it's the Ikea Gulliver cot that can easily be turned into a co sleeper. I just found the thread on mnet about the cots from Amazon etc but can't get my phone to cut and paste the link.

It was in the pregnancy topic.

I agree co-sleeper cots are a great idea but not talked about a lot. I wasn't really aware of them for DC1 but I might consider them for any future DC, they look very safe.

The one thing that always amuses me about co-sleeping is how it's held up to solve so many sleep problems. Not that I'm disagreeing that it doesn't probably solve a lot of them, but sometimes it is suggested for much older babies, and safe co-sleeping often requires moving all the furniture around etc. Not everyone is in a position to just safely plonk a baby in their bed and hope for the best.

Taking the side off a normal cot is not as safe as a co-sleeper.

If it's one that is equally as sturdy with 3 sides as it is 4. Bore off hobnob, I get it, I've got one kid, I'm not allowed to have opinions on parenting, all you people with several older children actually know everything, those of us that are new to it know nothing, yawn. And it's me who's been accused of being superior!

Why dr? A co sleeper is just a cot which has been designed for that purpose. They don't have any extra testing or anything. As long as you pick one which is suitable and know what you're trying to do there's no reason that it's less safe. In fact I'd always go for a custom made converted one because then you can get an exact match for the mattress height whereas with co sleeper cots they tend to have graduated settings for the mattress base which means that it's likely to be slightly above or slightly below your bed mattress. And they often need special sized mattresses which means people are probably more likely to reuse an older mattress (though that's splitting hairs a bit).

Any of the ikea cots which are designed to turn into a three sided bed, which is I think three out of four of the currently sold models, will very easily and safely convert because they are very sturdy with 3 sides on, being designed to be set up this way. They also have nice straight sides all the way up which don't taper, meaning you can drill holes as far up as you like.

Any cot bed will also be sturdy with 3 sides because again they are designed to be put together that way, but you'd have to watch out for the way the base attaches.

Most important thing to remember is to make sure that there is no gap which means pushing the cot mattress flush with your bed and plugging the other side with something that cannot act as a suffocation risk, and also making sure that the cot and bed can't move away from each other, which most likely means attaching the cot to the bed securely, but also checking it every night, checking what happens when somebody gets in or out of the big bed, when someone turns over, and checking it every night when you go to bed or put the baby to bed.

"I agree, thebody - parenting advice is generally a fashion and it does change."

I think you'll find that for 99.9% of human evolution, baby carrying, bed sharing and breastfeeding were pretty much ubiquitous.

In the days before formula, prams and cots.

Much of the world still lives like this.

The Ikea cots are designed to be used with one side off so they convert to a sort if cot bed so fine to use as a co-sleeper.

On the contrary pig I have four dc's all very different and have realised that there is no one magic bullet and parenting is a marathon not a sprint.
Parent as you see fit but don't be surprised when others do differently and find your tone annoying.

It also has to do with the height of the mattresses and the gap between them. If the regular cot does not have a very adjustable height mechanism i.e. there are large gaps between the possible heights, the co sleeper could end up at the wrong height. Most people here saying "oh just take the sides off a regular cot" don't know that most cots aren't stable with one side off (I have looked at the Ikea one and I know it is) and also seem to be implying you can just pick a random height that is vaguely near the bed height, not getting one custom made.

AIUI the co sleepers have been tested to see that a baby cannot roll between them and the adult bed. Ordinary cots have not.

Um aren't co sleeping cots just the same as a Moses Basket or cot next to the bed with a side missing?Not seeing the difference myself.

Not getting the need for the fancy name.I guess if you want to give a label to your parenting for whatever reason they're worth spending money on.Personally I loved our Moses baskets- next to bed,baby cries,you lift out- simple!

Of course they were, minifingers. That doesn't change the fact that different decades see different practices recommended.

5mad we were on verge of converting cot, but saw our co sleeper for £70 just in time, DH nor I very good at that sort of thing!

Or want to do things differently.

There are a lot of things in all aspects of life I'd rather not do as they did in previous centuries or third world countries- gives thanks for c/s,buggies,clean water,lovely shiny tins of formula,Calpol........oh and the IVF that gave them to me in the first place.

retro No its not same at all. With first I had moses, with second I had a section so looked into ways to make it easier and came up with co sleepers. I got one to help with the twisting and sitting up, all the sleep benefits were an un expected added bonus.

If you do research on them Like I Did extensively you will see from reviews people who have had moses say they are very different, much easier.

Many people who have had them with subsequent pregnancies also say like me, I wish I had had this first time round, I am evangelical on them because they are amazing.

No you have to adjust the height by drilling extra holes or attaching some kind of extra support shelf underneath the mattress base - of course it's not as simple as literally just taking the side off. I think that's just a simplification. I don't think I've ever seen anyone say "Just take the side off!" as you say there are usually 2 heights for cots so it would be far too low or far too high, presumably, and that would leave a big gap. I've seen people advise others to convert a cot though, or say "You can take the side off - google for instructions".

I don't think co sleepers are subject to any extra legally required testing. There is no British, European, American or Australian standard that I know of which covers co sleeper cots specifically. Plenty for cots in general, which cover things like distance between bars and possibly also height of bars, and definitely also drop side mechanisms (although those may have been banned entirely, not sure, it was after DS was born, his cot had one until we removed it!)

Whether individual manufacturers have tested their co sleeper cots is up to them but I would imagine not, because how could they test every single possible bed frame? There are hundreds if not thousands of differently designed beds on sale at any one time, not to mention that people will have older beds which aren't on sale any more and different designs of bed will be produced in the future.

I don't think they're any more or any less safe but I wouldn't spend out big £££ on one when the ikea cot is fit for purpose and so much cheaper.

I had a dream I was being buried alive. As I was struggling to free myself in my dream (asleep,) I punched my DH in the face in real life. He is a loon in his sleep too. One night he shook me awake screaming "don't move, there's a knife in the bed aargh! You're on the knife!" And promptly fell into a quiet sleep. I don't think any baby/child deserves that!

Just remember you dont need to spend £££ on one, you can buy second hand.

Inspite of being one of the longer BF eeders I was the only one in my BCT group getting sleep, because I was being disturbed the least.

I feed my baby to sleep and put him down in his cot. I do not co sleep because I am afraid that my DH or I might roll on top of him in our sleep. I also worry that he might suffocate under duvet. I am not against co sleeping per se, and know that there are ways to make it safer, but it just does not feel right for our family.

The main reason I'm scared of / don't want to consider co-sleeping is that it is has been shown to increase five fold the risk of death from the number 1 cause of death for healthy under 1s.

300 babies die from SIDS each year bbc article already referenced. This article also cites the study showing the increased rate.

For comparison in the most recent year data is available ONS 24 under 1s died in accidents. Not a single one died in a traffic accident.

It might be nice but it's a big risk.

I freaked out one night when DH had fallen asleep in the bed, he was lying on his side facing away from me & I woke up frantically trying to turn him onto his back, as I thought he was the baby!

The extreme tiredness freaked me out, I didn't trust myself enough to co sleep, I fell asleep sitting on the end if the bed one night DS was drizzling in his cot, I've never known exhaustion like it.

The total exhaustion stopped for me when the co-sleeping started - right from the first night, which was a bit of a desperate experiment. That's one reason it felt safer to me - if I'd carried on being exhausted and doing that deep sleeping due to extreme tiredness I don't think it would have felt as safe.

Sillylass79

There is no proper mattress, the lady we brought ours off had brought the proper makers, soft mattress otherwise its hard.