To be stunned at how deluded some parents are.

[Moonfacesmother]

Ds is in reception and occasionally I speak to one of the mothers of a little boy in the other reception class. She's very nice but since September I've had chapter and verse about how her ds is reading chapter books and writing at the level of an 8 year old but the school are useless and have been keeping him on really easy books, not sending him with the group of children who do phonics with year 1 etc.

I must admit I was confused by this as couldnt understand why if he was as far ahead as she said the school hasn't recognised this. Anyway I listened, sympathised and suggested things that she could maybe do (mainly speak to the teacher or head teacher).

Last week I went on a trip with ds's school and this little boy was there. Whilst there the children were given a few tasks and a couple of them included doing some drawing and a bit of writing if they were able. This little boy is mark making, he wasn't able to write his name etc. this is fine, it's reception - my ds isn't much different I was just a bit taken aback. I suppose I expected him to be writing War and Peace. I feel a bit sorry for him and also for playground mum. And also for the teachers as I know the mum has been in numerous times about the fact she doesn't feel the school have him at the right level.

I must remember in future to take what people say with a pinch of salt.

I used to be a primary teacher.

I think there are two kinds of delusion...1. Lovely kind where parents are bowled over by every little thing their child achieves. But aren't at all using that to,put down other children. Just genuine delight at their own child. Lovely for child to have parents like that, I always thought...someone to big you up whenever you learn a new letter sound etc. 2. Horrid kind where delusion leads to child being pressured and miserable, and parents use the 'information' to put other children down whilst trying to unfairly advance their own.

There are lots more of the first kind, fortunately.

my daughter was recognising written words at nine months and asked for a reading scheme at 2 years 4 months. after that, she could read. true. she can still read, now, come to think of it, and that's nearly thirty years later. i'm not deluded. she's just good with words. but carrying sneering at people, if it makes you happy.

Oh hang on actually she can't fully dress herself. She still needs her nappy put on first

We had a 2 year old at nursery who could dress and undress herself perfectly.
Also a toddler who had learnt to say .'H E N R I, Onree!' To people who addressed him as Henry.

Rabbitlady, wow!

I've posted this before but this daily mash article sums it up
www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/genius-children-somehow-becoming-average-adults-2014021283518

It's something I can always predict on Mumsnet. If someone comes on here saying how their child is really clever and can do XY and Z, The very next poster will always put them down and say their child could do that years earlier. Why don't people just enjoy their children the way they are?

i was deluded too my daughter told me about a competition for the gifted and talented students in her school she then said they were opening it up to other students if they had room i said if they do will you have a go? she was all MOM I AM one of the gifted and talented students

H E N R I - Onreeee

As I teacher, we have to deal we these types of parents all the time! Anything you say is not good enough for their gifted child despite the fact that in reality they are just Joe average! Their usual response is to remove their child from the school and then you hear that they have move their child on another 2 occasions because they aren't satisfied there either! Poor children :(

DC's BF's mum always talked about their DC being very good at Maths. The DC in question did not get level 5 in the Yr 6 maths (no level 6 then).

3 years later, that DC is in the top Maths set at secondary and getting fab marks.

So it turns out the mum was right after all.

My dd has received great reports from school and is in top class for Maths. I would never discuss this with anyone other than dh, dm and siblings.

Why parents would boast about their dc to other parents who do not care is beyond me.

I agree that children memorise stories which is why at times I pick out random words for my dd. Of course she does not like this!

Creasing at the poster upthread boasting about her now 30 year old daughters reading skills when she was 9 months old. Good grief. If that's the only thing of note she's achieved in 30 odd years....

Now my 8 year old has gotten a pretty bad report card that is not a reflection of his work and I'm not certain I'm willing to talk to her about it. Because I don't want to be tarred with the same feather as Oscar's mother.

I am 41 and can read like a 45 year old.

The sad thing is that any boasting doesn't do the child any favours really. If they are super clever, it'll be evident enough sooner or later, if not, that'll also become evident.
But its also pointless. I've never really cared either way how clever or not a child is, but I have noticed if they are kind and good company. If you want people to be impressed by your child, those are probably better things to focus on than trying to prove their academic credentials imo.

I did a lot of thinking on this before going to the parents evening, I was so convinced I was going to be told ds was way behind his peers I got defensive in advance

I have a friend like this, one minute her DS is top of the class for everything but the next she complains the teacher has put him into the bottom groups - crazy stuff. She slates anyone's DR'S who are bright as they 'clearly' are made to do 2 hours work a night a 7 years old!

Not all parents are lying though - my 2yo DS could dress and undress completely and knew all letter and numbers out of sequence. I don't think the dressing thing is particularly impressive as he is just well coordinated and also he has a good memory hence the letters and numbers. I would not discuss DS in RL though.

A reception child writing like an 8 Yo is pretty unusual though and I would be dubious about it even though it's not impossible.

we also get the competitive mom with the reading book he had not had a new book to bring home she sent him back in at three to get a new one as they read every night she stands at the door yelling get a RED one you KNOW your level its RED!! he is five years old fgs i don't put any pressure on my child he is the level below if i pushed him to read every night he could be but with his behaviour problems its easier to not do that in reception its better to read when the CHILD wants not you

Presumably "Onree" had heard his mum (understandably) repeating that little phrase an enormous number of times whenever anyone had to write his name down so it's hardly surprising that he mimicked it. DD used to ask for "my M I L K" from a very young age, having seen through our subtle adult plots - didn't mean she could spell.

When DD was doing ballet as a four year old I used to turn up and grin all the way through the half hour of her poncing about.
Her friend came too one week. Her friend was not desperately light on her feet and as she thundered around the hall her mum rushed up and said
'she's so good at this - just look at how she moves through space!'

'twas fab

hiddenhome my DS at 2 could fully undress and dress himself and was already potty trained so I don't find that statement unusual. Plus he could recite the alphabet and count to 30. Some kids can and some kids can't. I never boast about it though as I never realised it was unusual. The same goes for the fact he can tell the time again ever realised this was unusual and never boasted about it until some friends were gobsmacked when he told them the time.

Every child is different. Mine can't ride a bike even with stabilisers unlike most of his peers.

met someone a few years ago at a school reunion. she had always been full of tll stories, but insisted her 8 year old ahd read romeo and Juliet and Macbeth.
Fuck off I thought and rambled off for more cheese on a sick and white wine.

You are so right lettheriver. The kids who do 'best' overall are the ones who are cheerful, polite, helpful and kind to adults and other children, and work hard. These children have good friendships, do as well as they can academically and get given responsibility around school.

She hasn't said which 8 year old her DS's writing is similar to though, has she? It could be that he is writing in a similar way to a really thick 8 year old.