AIBU to not want to see grown adults defecate in the park?

[ResponsibleAdult]

This evening. Lovely mild, light, spring evening, decide to go for a gentle stroll in the park with DD and dogs. See charming young couple walking hand in hand in front of us, no small children, no special needs, no mobility issues. "Ah, loves young dream" I think.

Shortly, the couple separate and walk slowly in different directions. "Ah, going to pose for a softly backlit photo to show their romance blossoming" I think.

Couple remain, separated but squatting in bushes. "Ah a simple game of hide and seek to show spontaneous nature of loves young dream" I naively think .

On approaching, as walking the dogs, I am able to see she has her trousers down and is weeing/pooing in the bushes. Turn back to see squatting shatting boyfriend is now standing and weeing against a tree.

I got the rage.

Me loudest voice with tone of righteous indignation "EXCUSE ME? EXCUSE ME? There is a public toilet 100metres over there" I was ignored, and given a shrug of the shoulders by little Miss Holly Golightly.

So I repeat, my volume rising "EXCUSE ME? There is a public toilet, that is OPEN just over there. I suggest you go and use it as I DONT WANT TO SEE YOUR BARE ARSE!". Point at Golum boy, and repeat same phrase.

Loves young dream ( Golum boy and Golightly) pull up their trousers and shuffle off, muttering "alright! alright" under their breath. Was it a dare, a FB craze, a bizarre fetish, extreme sport dogging???? I don't care.

DD gives me a , I give her a , we carry on our walk.

AIBU???

That's coprophagia, Bewitched.

What rabbits and cows do, the double stomach thing, is that called ruminant? The scat jazz singing I knew.

But honestly, in the park yesterday, my first thought was "Dirty bastards" not "Good heavens there appears to be some sort of sex act occurring".

If I had realised I think I might have had second thoughts about my loud reprimand. Really, I thought scatological interests were the stuff of urban myth, not reality. Not what young people did in daylight in parks.

[puking emoticon] brain bleach again

Cows chew the cud.

Oh yes, thanks Grunt.

I didn't ask for details ShredMe! Actually I was just concentrating on arranging my face appropriately

Sorry, meant to say, that's a bit different to what rabbits do. Dogs eat the faeces and vomit of other animals as well as themselves. That's very difficult to understand from a biological point of view.

Revolting an' all.

I still can't imagine how one person broaches the subject with another, to see if they are into the same thing.

Well,I worked at a third party billing agency for porn sites in Amsterdam, so if a member couldn't get their password to work, and had paid, I'd have to get them into the site, and holy shit there's some weird stuff out there.

Make a couple shitting in a park look tame

In the animal kingdom, between animals of the same species, they can do what the hell they like. I've seen David Attenborough and if he says so I believe him.

On MN we are open minded individuals, trying not to be to judgey, except when we are hoiking judgey pants live and let live, each to there own lifestyle choices and so on. So when I thought they were just being dirty bastards, the AIBU thread was appropriate. Now aware of the wider context, where on earth would you put that kind of thread .

Please don't answer that, on a need to know basis, I don't need to know

Threadworm must be even more prevalent among scatters than the average nursery class.

Hmm. I think it's kind of not acceptable to shit in public places for your thrills, but if people want to do it in their own homes and/or anywhere private and clean up afterwards, I can't say I'm terribly bothered by the idea.

Did they have any toilet paper with them?

This makes me think of the Amateur Transplants dogging.

The fact I know such a stupid weird as hell song tells you I'm under 30.

But yes this is absolutely disgusting.

I don't know if I'd have had the guts to tell them how sick the dirty gits were.

I'd take a photo and shout, 'This would be perfect for my online website" mind you these types would probably get off on that.

I agree absolutely SGB, and he was a very sensitive, fragile bloke; I really didn't want to upset him by showing any disgust. He was obviously trusting me not to.

I could have done without the descriptions and drawings with my marmite toast though!

MN is a bit like going to school. You learn lots. Though perhaps you don't actually want/need to know it! Am shocked! I'll be going to Bushy Park in future!!

This is one of the most disturbing threads I've read ever or at least today . People are weird.

any word ending in 'philia' is something to do with sex.

Will someone explain the frozen turds mentioned up thread to me please?

Also where would they be frozen? In a domestic freezer? Like sausages? Imagine getting them out for your tea one night..

People freeze poo in condoms and then use them as poo dildos

No!!!!

hahahahahahahahha

HOW do people think these things up? The only thing I want to do with a turd is avoid it! Why oh why, would anyone shove a frozen turd back from whence it came?

Oh, fucking hell. Why did I click back on this?!

Now I'm wondering how they get the shit into the condoms and can't unwonder.

With a funnel, I presume.

Don't think that'd work. Would it?

Icing sugar nozzle maybe? Or a teaspoon. But that would mean tamping it down.

Piping bag?