To tell Dh it is not ok to leave 10yr old ds and 6 yr old dd alone in the house?

[StartRight]

Dh is making me feel that I'm making a mountain out of a molehill but I came back from work today (later than usual as had a meeting) to find Dh in the car on the drive about to take ds2 to beavers.

He was going to leave ds1 and dd1 in the house while he dropped ds2 off! They are only 10 and 6.

Dh says they were both settled watching tv and he would only have been gone for 5mins.

However I am appalled and feel shocked that he has considered doing this. I'm really upset and feel cross but can't be cross as Dh is making out that I'm over reacting.

Am I?

I think it's Ok if you time it such that they have got their beans out, are in chill-out mode and can be placed in front of some sort of electronic device for the 3-4 minutes you'll be out. Obviously it wouldn't work to leave them if they are chasing each other around the house or squabbling over hot-wheels.

I think is IS sometimes an older siblings responsibility to look after their sibling. Older siblings get some bonuses such as a later bedtime....more pocket money...there has to be balance. I'm not going to treat my DD as older in one way and not in another....her little sister is also aware that your sibling comes first...always...that they are a team and both must support the other. Siblings DO have responsibility.

Yabu. They will be fine for a short while at 10 and 6.

I definitely wouldn't have left them at age. They would have to come too.

I was honestly expecting lots of outraged responses about leaving a 6 yr old without an adult.

I'm obviously far too over protective.

I do this when I pop to local shop - it's near the end of my street. Wouldn't do it if I was in the car in case I had an accident.

My first reaction was no way would I do that. But come to think of it, at age 10 I used to walk my 6 or 7 year old brother home from school, let us both in and wait until our older brother got home (he was 13 and was usually home about 45 mins after us). Then we'd all be home alone until Mum got home at 5.30ish. I don't remember it being an issue, I don't think I'd do things that way though.....

I would for 5 mins if they were engaged in something. I have done.
My 11 & 6 yo are sensible.
It's not illegal, but it is your (or dh's) responsibility. If anything untoward happened you'd be the one in trouble iyswim.

U kno yr bubs Hun.

I would certainly leave them under those circumstances. Only you know the children and how they are together but it is very unfair to drag the 10 yr old out, even if you take the 6 yr old.

I think it depends on the children. I often look after my 10 year old niece and I wouldnt be worried about leaving her (i wouldnt as shes not mine!) With my 7 year old dd1. Especially if they have just huddled down to watch a film.

I've left my six year old for five mins while I go to the corner shop. I can see the house from the shop, and I know he will just carry on reading his book. he is sensible, and knows he mustn't answer the door or go into the kitchen.

Slapperati Dh is normally fine, not the most hands on of dads but not normally wildly irresponsible

Brianthemole - yes 5 mins, the hall is just across a field from us

I wouldn't leave my 10yr old responsible for my 6yr old and I also don't leave my 6yr old with my 12yr old (I have 3 DC)

I leave the. For short burst on their own or together at 12 and 10 but my 6yr old stays with an adult.

It'd does depend on the child in some way but I would want my v sensible 12 year old to feel responsible for her 6yr old sister if anything went wrong

Id leave the 10 year old but not the 6 year old

I don't think you're being over protective at all.

A 6year old and a 10 year old left alone for however long seems unacceptable to me too.

Accidents can happen in the blink of an eye and it's a parents (or other adults) responsibility to be there just incase!

Plus, isn't it actually illegal to leave children alone before the age of 12?

YABU and also a tad over-dramatic about it all. The kids are old enough to follow a plan / make contact if there was an issue.

Your DH was looking after them and he thinks it is OK, I don't see how you change it unless he agrees.

Becles, I'd disagree.

Children of this age may know the drill but they lack the maturity to act calmly enough to follow the drill in stressful/dramatic situations.

Why should they be potentially put in such a situation anyway, they're little kids!

Thanks MommyPolis that is what I'm worried about - no one being there in an emergency.

I probably am bring over dramatic it seems. Maybe I owe Dh an apology.

I've got a 10 and a 6 year old. No WAY would I leave them alone. YANBU.

What do you mean Delphin?

Jeez, I let my 10 year old walk home from school alone, use his own key to get in to the house and look after himself until the 13 year old gets home about 20 minutes later. Is that unusual??

I mean that if I am looking after the children and think it reasonable to do something then I will do it. You have obviously discussed it and he still thinks it reasonable,so I don't see how you change it.

StartRight, I really don't think you're being over dramatic.

As a Mom always go with your gut instinct. It told you that it was unacceptable and I agree wholeheartedly!

I really think that it's not you who should be apologising. My husband would have been sleeping in the shed if he'd left ours alone at that age!

You are over reacting massively, unless your children are very immature or badly behaved... OF course you -(plural, you and/ or DH, ideally in co-operation) should have gone through with them what to do in various emergency situations, who to call etc. etc. - that should be hard wired by age 10!