To think this wasn't offensive?

[CasioBlues]

I work in an office, and after meetings, there are often spare sandwiches that are offered around.

I work in one group. A group of people of a similar level, all friends, were talking today and someone mentioned these sandwiches were brought to their group by a female member of staff, and also friend. A friend in another group mentioned sandwiches also came around to their group by a female member of staff.

A male friend in my group quipped about the member of staff who brings them around "what a slag!". A few of us laughed, one friend found it really offensive.

I think among friends, it was obviously a joke on the "promiscuity" of sandwiches, but I'm prepared to admit I was wrong to think it wasn't offensive. It wasn't very professional, but among friends?

I really don't see what's wrong with the joke. It was just a joke.

Do you mean the FB joke or the one on this thread?

In either case at the very least what is wrong is neither are funny.

Here it is in a nutshell:

*I guess the male equivalent of a slag is a slag.

stud, player, Romeo, seducer, womaniser, alpha-male, Casanova, Lothario, philanderer, lady-killer, ladies' man

Yep. Totally the same cultural loading.*

Also, why the actual fuck would you feel the need to say that she was '(happily married, couple of kids' if you weren't aware of the cultural significance of the word 'slag'?

The one on this thread. Me and my DP laughed. I don't get why everyone's so cross with the oP. She sounds OK to me.

the frankie Boyle ones' a bit mean its true.

Up the chimney why do you think op "has never been near a university" the snobbery of that statement is astounding. I think people from all walks of life will hold views, opinions and yes find something funny that you dont agree with.

I think its snobby too happycourse. I didn't go to university but I'm not stupid.

I read the thread now and I get the bit about being a feminist, but I still do not understand why its not funny.

How strange! What part of the country/world, has this sort of strange humour? I cannot give an answer, as to me in any form, such a description/term is not humourous so i am simply left agog!

You need to get out more Iddi!

Iddi you're doing fine, and NBU.

I think its funny.

Iddi The United Kingdom perhaps?

I don't find myself self censoring in order to refrain from using words like this in the
workplace. I don't behave in a "fake" way at work either in order to behave appropriately and professionally.

Name change. I am a feminist and I found her sandwich joke very funny, actually.

Wonder why you felt the need to name change then

Plus the question was whether it was offensive. Which in a professional context it is IMO. Unless one isn't very professional at all.

Good question, Zombie!

I agree with feminist principles which probably makes me a feminist too, it was said amongst a close group - friends. Think folk lead very strange lives if they don't sometimes tease and say rude type things at times amongst friends. All makes me think that some of you live in a polite bubble and haven't mixed much if you are so convinced that everyone would be shocked and offended at this kind of banter. A real arrogance and lack of tolerance showing - especially with statements such as this,

"If you don't find the subtext funny, because you realise that women have died to overcome the stereotyping and discrimination that the subtext promotes, then you won't find the joke funny, no matter how clever the play of words." - talk about overplaying your hand and beating everyone over the head with smug outrage.

And the arrogance displayed here,

"Of course it's wrong no matter who says it. I don't think anybody is disputing that." - yes some have actually and some do find it funny but obviously if you say different.

Because I identify my profession on here. But, it doesn't take away from the fact that in a professional context, between close friends, I would find it funny. I'm not proud of it, but it made me really laugh.

I didn't find it funny. More like embarrassing.

Lougle's post above has it, I never really bought into the concept of slutdom.

... and was therefore not offensive, no.

I got the joke.

It just wasn't funny.

"Of course it's wrong no matter who says it. I don't think anybody is disputing that." - yes some have actually and some do find it funny but obviously if you say different

Apologies. I meant I hadn't seen anyone who objected to the statement saying it would have been more acceptable if said by different people. I got the impression that those who felt it was unacceptable professionally felt it was unacceptable whoever said it. Perhaps my perception was wrong.

I suppose it's covered by that modern catch all "inappropriate".

I understand the joke and the context and I find it offensive because I find the word offensive on its own. Perhaps you could view it in a similar way to a racially offensive word? No-one finds racist jokes funny these days, hopefully in another 10 years no-one will find these other kinds of abusive terms funny.