To think this wasn't offensive?

[CasioBlues]

I work in an office, and after meetings, there are often spare sandwiches that are offered around.

I work in one group. A group of people of a similar level, all friends, were talking today and someone mentioned these sandwiches were brought to their group by a female member of staff, and also friend. A friend in another group mentioned sandwiches also came around to their group by a female member of staff.

A male friend in my group quipped about the member of staff who brings them around "what a slag!". A few of us laughed, one friend found it really offensive.

I think among friends, it was obviously a joke on the "promiscuity" of sandwiches, but I'm prepared to admit I was wrong to think it wasn't offensive. It wasn't very professional, but among friends?

Do those of you who find it offensive find the term 'media whore' offensive too, when that is applied pretty much equally to men and women?

Just interested.

Yes, I do.

I can't believe I've spent the time to read all these posts but I have. And I'm not going to bed without saying a few things (actually looks as if I have run out of time to go to bed at all - I really must learn to switch off MN):

First: how good are these blasted sandwiches that your friend wanted them all for himself (or his group)? The ones in my office were really not worth being upset about if they were shared a bit more thinly around, certainly not worth insulting your so called friend, especially not when she is NOT THERE to laugh WITH you...

Second: OP talks about being FRIENDS and talks about a JOKE. If he had meant and/or he had said TO the colleague: Oh but I thought those were just for us because we are so special (like a couple of people before me have suggested) THAT would have been a sweet, friendly thing to say AND mildly funny. Calling someone - anyone - a slag is just nasty, not funny, not at all ridiculing-the-sexist-connotation-of-the word-because-it's-about-sandwiches. It's just not NICE. It's NOT a joke. Certainly not appropriate at work. She might have said she wasn't offended but do you think she would have actually LIKED the joke? I mean in the admiring "how witty and funny" not in the "what a moron you are but I am your friend and I'll pretend I don't mind" way...

Third: I don't buy the post-doc lecturers crap either. I bet half of what people write here is made up to protect anonymity, anyway, and this one smells so wrong to me... Or maybe I just DON'T WANT TO BELIEVE the academic background. Please please please tell me there isn't a uni in the UK that PAYS morons who can have this kind of ignorant, crass, retrograde attitude to TEACH any kind of subject to our children (where's the emoji for "I want to cry" when you need it?)

I would've found it hilarious. Some people just have a dark and un-PC sense of humour. The more outrageous the better for me. :D Po-faced lefties in Academia always want to tell people what they can and can't say or find it funny.

Dark and un-pc sense of humour? Nope. That's what what you tell yourself when you are immature and think it's cool to be rude, or you are not prepared to understand the real value of words. Words can inspire or oppress. Is this site not populated my mums? Don't we all teach our children the power of words? Don't we all warn (or try to, at least) that once you say something nasty it becomes easier to say something nastier? Haven't you guys watched 'Love story" for goodness sake?

by mums, even.

If I had a "dark and un-PC" sense of humour I suspect it would take more than somebody calling a woman colleague a "sandwich slag" to have me rolling in the aisles!

What people find rude is entirely objective. You can't please everyone. What one person finds offensive another will find hilarious. Prefer someone who says what they feel even if it divides opinion than someone bland who's censoring themselves constantly and being fake. Even if someone's massively racist I'd prefer if they were open about it so at least people knew their true colours. Censorship does no good at all.

"What people find rude is entirely objective."

I think you mean subjective. And no it isn't.

Birdo the 50s called and they want you back.

I have heard the phrase 'play date whore' used before and thought that amusing. And never considered that the phrase was remotely likening the mother to being a prostitute!

Why is no one getting the context here?? Calling other people names at work?

I really hope he has to get his own sandwiches next time

Oh Zombies I think a lot of us are ...

Saying this weak joke appeals to a "dark and un pc sense " of humour" is hilarious. Although I'm sure unintentionally.

You are all nuts and I would never want to go to the pub with you all. The smug worthiness and dissecting every word would be soul destroying.

Voting. Op was BU at the time & BVVVU on this thread.

I cross posted with Cobalt Crow. I caught the Frankie Boyle Adlington nose "joke". I'm ashamed that the shock value made me laugh. Posters here have tried to explain to the Op better than I can. I d

Voting OP wasn't BU to find it funny. I don't know if she has been on the thread.... I've skipped some. So I'm BU :)

Posted too early. I don't want Frankie Boyle educating my kids, and Op was unreasonable.

Maybe read the thread or the Op? The question wan't "was it at all funny". The question was "am I being unreasonable not find it offensive?"

Cobalt I reckon the feeling is mutual.
Also. Pub. NOT. EQUAL. to. workplace.

And some groups who work together are very good friends - not just colleagues. Many of my best friends are work mates, we don't just sit talking about the latest project.

I would never want to go to the pub with you all

But this was at work, not the pub. And supposedly in a work context in which adults are educating young adults although actually I don't think the OP has ever been anywhere near a university

I hadn't heard the Frankie Boyle comment about Rebecca Adlington but have Googled it and it's pathetic. Not funny, not edgy, not shocking just pathetic.